Don’t let how fluffy and adorable cats are fool you. Behind their precious paws and adorable purring, cats are criminal masterminds, equipped with murder mittens and the capability of concocting diabolical plans.

If you’re a cat owner, this will come as no surprise to you. But if your fur babies are not of the feline persuasion, you might be surprised to hear about some of the most mischievous “cat crimes” that have ever been committed.

Premee Mohamed recently tweeted about how the crime rate in her home has increased exponentially since she adopted a cat, and many other cat lovers were inspired to share their own pets’ criminal records. So enjoy scrolling through this hilarious list that might make you want to handcuff (paw-cuff?) your own little kitty, and keep reading to find conversations we were lucky enough to have with Premee and cat expert Heather Svoboda Miller, Communications and Development Manager at Cat Adoption Team. And remember to upvote the responses that you think would earn a cat felon some serious street cred!

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To learn more about how this conversation started in the first place, we reached out to Premee Mohamed, the author who started this viral thread holding cats accountable for their crimes. First, we wanted to know if Premee has always been a cat person or if this is a new adventure for her. “I’ve always liked cats, and I’ve hung out with the cats of friends and cat-sat a few times, but Fiasco is the first cat I’ve ever owned!” she told Bored Panda. “I adopted him in July 2022.”

We also asked Premee what has surprised her the most about having Fiasco. “I’m so new to cat ownership that everything is a surprise,” she shared. “I thought you couldn’t touch cat bellies, but he loves being petted and brushed on his belly! Things going missing, I think I expected, but not to this extent. Not being able to go to the bathroom alone… People warned me about that, but I thought they were exaggerating.” 

“And I think most of all, I’m constantly surprised by how clingy he is! I thought cats slept most of the day and liked their own space, but he’d be attached to me with velcro if he could,” she added. “I feel like I might have to buy a pet sling, so I can work without interruption.”  

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When it comes to what Premee thinks all other pet owners should know, she says, “Get pet insurance! This is a very boring thing to say but I think it’s important!”

And as far as why we love these cats, despite their criminal nature, Premee told Bored Panda, “They’re such funny, affectionate little animals, it’s impossible not to love them! I swear I’ve learned something new about Fiasco every day, and laughed at him every day since I got him. He’s worth the world even though he REALLY NEEDS to stop STEALING MY SOCKS AND STUFFING THEM UNDERNEATH THE BED.”

Finally, she added, “Support your local animal rescues and shelters if you can! They always need money, volunteers, food, blankets, and towels if you can spare it.”

And if you’d like to support Premee the author, as well as the cat owner, you can find her website and all of her books right here!  

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To learn even more about these fluffy little felons that we know and love, we reached out to cat expert Heather Svoboda Miller, Communications and Development Manager at Cat Adoption Team in Oregon, and she was kind enough to have a chat with us. First, we were curious why we perceive cats as so mischievous. “Cats are intelligent and trainable, but dogs tend to be easier for humans to train so I think many of us consider dogs to be more obedient, while we might think of cats as naughtier, more independent, or even apathetic,” Heather told Bored Panda. 

“Cats are clever, small, and agile, so they can make their way into unexpected spots where we might not want them to go — into the home ducting, on top of high beams, slipping out of a cat carrier — which makes them seem like little deviants when really they are just acrobatic and prone to hiding!” she explained. “While I love to think my cats understand me, I doubt they have any idea that I think of them as ornery. And if they did know, I doubt they’d care!”

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We also asked Heather why she thinks we love cats so much, despite their lengthy criminal records. “In my line of work, I talk with a lot of cat lovers and in my experience, we seem to love them not in spite of their ‘criminal’ behavior but because of it!” she noted. “Cats surprise and delight us with their antics, bringing laughter to our lives. When your cat swipes a loaf of bread off the counter, for instance, it’s as hilarious as it is frustrating. Cat people just can’t get enough of cats being ‘naughty’ (though I do wish they wouldn’t eat all my cords!).”

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And if the cat crimes in your home have gotten a little out of control, we asked Heather how they can be prevented or managed. “Some unwanted behavior is inevitable from any pet because some of their most natural instincts, scratching for example, are behaviors we don’t always love in our homes,” she explained. “But with a little patience and effort, it’s possible to reduce the number of ‘cat crimes’ committed in our homes through positive training methods, like clicker training, and by better understanding our pets’ needs.”

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“As experts in cat care, Cat Adoption Team offers a wealth of cat care and training information on our website,” Heather added. “Fear Free Happy Homes, Jackson Galaxy, Kitten Lady, Pam Johnson-Bennett, and Karen Pryor Clicker Training are a few other great resources. Depending your cat’s personal brand of naughtiness, cat-proofing your home might mean putting valuable keepsakes in safe places your cat really can’t reach, using child-safe locks to secure cabinet doors closed, tucking electrical cords into protective covers, and making sure there are plenty of people-approved scratching surfaces like cat trees or cardboard scratchers in areas where your cat spends their time.”

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Finally, Heather wants to remind cat owners to be aware of changes in their pet’s behavior. “Always remember that a new or strange cat behavior could be the result of a medical condition, so check with your veterinarian, especially if your cat is eliminating outside their litter box, eating or chewing odd items, vocalizing more frequently, hiding more or less, having trouble jumping/landing a jump, etc.,” she told Bored Panda. “You might learn that their ‘mischievous’ behavior is the result of pain or suffering, so you can take steps to help them feel better and improve the situation for everyone!”

If you’d like to gain even more guidance from the experts at Cat Adoption Team, be sure to visit their website right here!

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Cats are also a quite intelligent species, which can contribute to their level of curiosity, and in turn their “crime rates”. “Lively minds are by definition curious,” philanthropist and researcher Stephen Grand, Ph.D. told Rover. “Cats frequently get themselves stuck up in trees, jammed in trash cans, or peppered with hedgehog quills—all in the name of curiosity.” We might consider these actions as crimes, when they inconvenience us humans or cause us to do some cleaning up, but to our little felines, they’re just following their instincts.

And similarly to humans, cats are likely to become less mischievous as they get older. “Kittens tend to be more curious because they are learning about things in their environment that they have never encountered before,” Dr. Delgado explained. “To determine if something is safe, a kitten might want to watch it, slowly approach it, and maybe touch, smell or taste it.” So if you’ve recently taken in a kitten with a penchant for committing crimes, rest assured. They should slow their roll, eventually. 

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When trying to keep a particularly rowdy kitten from wreaking too much havoc on your home, Dr. Kim Anderka and Dr. Christina Douthwaite at Ilderton Pet Hospital recommend ensuring that the little guy or gal has plenty of toys and interactive play sessions. “Rotating the cat toys to keep them fresh and interesting can also help to keep him engaged,” the doctors explain on their site. “It is important to avoid giving him the opportunity to engage in inappropriate behavior. When we try to intervene, we often inadvertently reward the naughty activities and accidentally reinforce them. Mental stimulation is equally important as physical play. Consider food hide and seek games, laser pointer play, fetch games and problem solving games. Be creative-hide a toy under a cardboard box or in a container and see if he can get it out.” They also added that rewards should be given to our cats after displaying desired behavior, such as verbal praise, petting, and giving treats to show them that you approve. “A tired cat is a happy cat.”  

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Are you feeling a bit scared of your feline friends after realizing the destruction that they are capable of? It’s important to know what you’re getting yourself into before adopting a cat, but as all cat owners will tell you, it’s totally worth the mayhem to get to share your life with a mischievous little fur ball. Keep upvoting the pics that you find most hilarious, or relatable if you’ve got some kitties of your own, and then if you’re interested in checking out a Bored Panda article celebrating cats’ adorable “murder mittens”, you can find that piece right here!  

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