Much of what we think we know about prison comes from movies and the media, often reduced to clichés that paint a one-dimensional picture. But there’s so much to it that rarely gets acknowledged.

So, one curious Redditor asked former inmates to share what most people aren’t typically aware of when it comes to life behind bars. The question sparked plenty of responses, and we’ve gathered some of the most intriguing ones. Find them below—you’ll likely learn something you didn’t expect.

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#1

You’ve heard of for-profit prisons, but it starts well before and ends well after prison.

Everything has a cost: parole (you pay a parole fee), community service (you pay a community service fee), court costs, you owe the state for part of the cost of you being in jail. Restitution (paying back the people hurt by your crime). Ankle monitor, on your tab. Can’t pay? Parole revoked, back to jail with no chance of re-parole / you must serve your full sentence because you violated conditions of your parole.

The biggest scams are the halfway houses. They were about $1500 a month in my town to share a dormroom with, well, another ex-con. Can’t pay? Parole revoked, back to prison.

And remember that you’re supposed to be paying all this on whatever job you can get **as a felon**. Do you know how many jobs, like Wendy’s or even Kroger, tell you to [what the heck] when you answer that you have a felony conviction? I couldn’t work at a *library*. What, you think I’m going to steal a library book?

If you have a substance-related conviction (and sometimes, even if you don’t… eg me), you have to do regular d**g testing. You’re paying for that, of course. Can’t pay? Back to prison. It was like $128 a month for 2x month d**g testing. And again, my conviction wasn’t d**g related.

My roomie did have a d**g-related conviction, so he had to do three random d**g tests a week (that he had to pay for). He almost got sent back to prison (2 of 3 strikes) for testing “dilute”; that is, his urine was too watery. He was walking home in 95* heat (can’t have a car at this halfway-house) and was, you guessed it, drinking water.

I did the math and I owed about $2200 / month in mandatory court expenses, that if I did not pay I would go back to jail. That was something like 200 hours of work / month, *before taxes and not even considering food*. And I had a fairly good job, *especially* for a convicted felon.

But the best part was the judge that sentenced both of us **owned the halfway house**. He was a partial owner. Talk about cash 4 kids.

The system is absolutely, 100% designed to send you back to prison. There is simply no way a normal ex-con can get out of the “cycle” on their own.

edit: this was in one of, if not the most, progressive towns in the country. I cannot imagine what it would be like in the Sheriff Joe Arapaio places of the world.

© Photo: persondude27

#2

Here in Wisconsin, there’s a volunteer organization that trains guide dogs. All guide dogs in this program are housed at a prison an trained by an inmate for a portion of every dogs puppy raising process.

newsgroupmonkey:

In many prisons in the UK, dogs, particularly cute ones, are allowed in prisons as therapy dogs.
Apparently you can often take the hardest, most manly prisoner and they’ll become an absolute softy around a cute dog.
On the other hand, the security dogs, don’t muck about around them.

© Photo: X-Winter_Rose-X

#3

How loud it is ALL THE TIME. [darn] near deafening.

© Photo: 02217739

#4

A lot of people don’t realize how much trading goes on inside. It’s not just cigarettes everything has value, from ramen noodles to stamps. The barter system is huge, and sometimes it feels like an economy all on its own.

© Photo: oneidamorawiakikcii

#5

Not a former prisoner, but used to work in a job that involved the prison system:

1) The sheer volume of paperwork prisoners do every day. Everything they do, everything they request, almost every little interaction with the facility involves paperwork.

2) How *normal* a prison can feel, almost like any institutional setting — hospital, university, etc. — with people hanging around, shooting the s**t, going to work, going to class, until suddenly it very much doesn’t.

© Photo: User

#6

Never went to prison but got arrested before and spent a few days in jail. Chained next to a guy that was a repeat offender and taught his GF, who also got arrested with him, sign language. Neither are deaf; they use it to signal each other in between cells. I always thought that was pretty interesting.

© Photo: User

#7

From my husband/ best friend :

“From the color of the uniform to the color of the walls, every detail of a prison was thought about and placed to keep your mind numb and institutionalized”.

© Photo: AriasDNA

#8

Can only speak for Australian prisons, but the food can be incredible if you’re lucky and they let the prisoners cook.

Every chef is on d***s and will eventually spend time locked up, so you can have the entire kitchen of a prison be top class chefs.

Seriously, the best crumbed chicken I’ve ever had in my life was in Pentridge in the mid 90s. So crisp and full of flavour. 25 years and I’ve never had anything which has come close to how nice it was. Wish I know who cooked it so I could visit their restaurant, lol.

© Photo: Restart_from_Zero

#9

There are a lot of nerds in prison. Like regular DnD campaigns, magic the gathering battles, we played tons of board games, occasionally got awarded a game system for cleanest unit. (Only Madden and Forza tho, no shooters).

© Photo: igillyg

#10

Lifers get more perks than temp prisoners. They have nothing to lose really, so they are kept happy. (Ireland)

© Photo: AlienInOrigin

#11

It’s smelly and loud, the TV is fought over, but we all sang along to the commercials, the water is either way too hot, or ice cold. The food [is bad] a*s, I had like 3 pieces of fruit the whole time I was there. It made me not want to ever go back again, so I guess I learned my lesson. There was little to no mental health support, and half of the people in there just have undiagnosed mental illnesses.

© Photo: Ok_Speaker_3283

#12

Women’s prison is a pettier, gayer version of middle school. I got pretty much molested daily my first 2 months. Prison definitely helped me to have a backbone. They are nice to you if they can tell you’re not from the lifestyle. Most of the time I escaped the drama because my character and heart saved me, so if someone did try to start something the other girls would usually step up for me.

Everyone is allll talk and if fights do happen they’re not that serious and usually about prison gfs or mutual dudes on the outside. Yes it is as gay as it is the media. 90%, married or not, no matter how straight they claim to be, engage in sexual activities or heavy petting and hand holding lol. Even more definitely get into a weird emotional/romantic relationship even if they never cross the physical activity line. It’s boring.

Depending on the program you’re in there’s mandatory wake up at either 5am or 9am. I was in the 5am and you get written up if you’re caught laying down. It’s super hard to actually have any s*x unless you’re roommates especially in a smaller facility the guards really have no lives so they police even sharing headphones. I got written up once for letting my roommate use my mayo at cafeteria for dinner.

You get reallyyyy comfortable having to strip down and spread and cough. I had to do it usually at least 3x a week. Most women gain a minimum of 30lbs, everythinggggg is processed and any gym time you get is limited and has time constraints based on units. The food [is bad] so most of the time you have to rely on commissary. I’m a chef and the facility I was in had a toaster oven so the girls loved me because I taught a lot of them how to make some good food haha, but also the ones that have done a lot of time know how to get creative. It’s crazy. We had girls making egg rolls and Alfredo haha. No matter how nice the staff might be you will still always be put into place and reminded/treated like a subpar human being.

© Photo: besofrrn_

#13

If you’re on the spectrum it’s gonna be hella overstimulating. The fluorescent lighting, the celly that won’t shut [darn] up, the texture of the scrubs you gotta wear.

© Photo: User

#14

How creative every one is. People invent the craziest s**t to do mundane things that we take for granted.
I don’t wanna burn out the real creative stuff, but first thing that comes to mind is tv stands made of toilet paper and tattoo guns made of dismantled cd players and guitar strings.

JudgeJuryEx78:

My son’s father made some really cool beads out of plastic bags and sent me a necklace and a bracelet. I’ve never worn them but I kept them. It’s impressive.

© Photo: the_snowbird93

#15

I found it pretty relaxing to not have to think about what you are going to do for the day. Also no pressure to achieve something. Yes, there were those walls and barbwire fences. But I flourished as a person in prison. And that’s something I do not talk about with other people. That I liked it there.

Yes, prison can be good for you.

© Photo: VariousIngenuity2897

#16

The California department of corrections and rehabilitation is almost self sufficient. They make almost everything they use, food, clothing, all that.

© Photo: mooney275

#17

Cell phones are extremely easy to get, and contrary to popular belief, it’s not just the COs bringing them in. That’s actually less common than you think. Not a lot of people want to risk their job and benefits for their family for a bit of money. And inmates don’t want to risk being thrown in the hole for trying to proposition an officer. They also don’t want to be seen talking privately to an officer and looking like a snitch. There’s other ways contraband can get in.

Drones dropping contraband into the yard is common nowadays. There’s also the old walking up and throwing it over the fence. My spot let inmates drive cars for certain jobs, sometimes even off prison property. We also had windows that opened, and could be taken completely off by unscrewing some bolts.

Every night after count, a group of inmates would go out the window and grab alcohol, cigarettes, cell phones, and the big one was actually food. Usually dropped in a huge duffle bag in the woods behind the prison. A lot of them got picked up by their wives/girlfriends and hung out for a few hours. I know someone who got their girl pregnant while doing that. When COs noticed she was pregnant during a visit, he was put in the hole and investigated. Not sure what happened after that.

Eventually someone snitched and 4 of them got caught. Here’s the news article.

© Photo: DifferentPost6

#18

How much just 1 year inside will change you. I spent one year in, and now my anxiety has tripled. I can’t deal with large groups of people, even if it’s family, and I catch myself always watching people, especially at work.

© Photo: PaulCorporations

#19

There are a lot of talented people in prison. Artists who can draw sexual pictures are popular.

© Photo: AlienInOrigin

#20

I’m a CO, I will say that it’s interesting how a lot of inmates have their own “sky writing” sign language to talk to each other while we are in the block.

© Photo: User

#21

Trusted prisoners often work as counselors and get training by The Samaritans. They save lives by helping prisoners cope, especially new prisoners. S*icides happen maybe once or twice per year. (Ireland)

© Photo: AlienInOrigin

#22

Not prison, but I did some months in county jail and toothpaste is the go-to treatment for almost any skin issues.

jessipepper27:

Toothpaste is also a good adhesive. The amount of times I’ve escorted prisoners to fix up smashed up cells and there’s toothpaste being scrubbed off all the walls because they’ve used it to stick up photos and whatever else. No wonder they go through it like there’s no tomorrow.

© Photo: kickaguard

#23

Oh my God the corruption of the guards is SO prevalent!!! It’s right out in the open clear as day. Watching female guards crying when certain inmates were leaving. Female guards when serious bling all pretties up at work. Female guards disappearing into cells.

Respect is a joke. No one gives it. If they think or say your p**o, your f****d. Doesn’t matter if your paperwork shows you’re not a p**o. The inmates will say you made your paperwork and it’s fake, they got people on the outside saying you’re a p**o. I spent 4 1/2 years fighting because they said all that and that I looked like p**o.

EVERYONE snitches.

Inmates believe if you’re doing the f*****g or receiving head, your not gay. We all heard a guy who was married with kids being released in a week. [forced intimacy] his cellmate every night

Guards don’t give a c**p about you. A guard walked into the shower room and caught a bunch of inmates gangraping a small white inmate. The guard walked out and did nothing. It wasn’t until 2 hours later another guard found the inmate barely alive covered in blood.

© Photo: User

#24

It’s a lot more relaxed than people would guess, common knowledge of prison has come from media that dramatizes the conflicts and violence. There is conflict and violence, but unless one places themselves in a position to be targeted, it’s unlikely they will be.

© Photo: AgreeablePollution7

#25

Prison is mostly boredom, trading items to get by, and staying alert to avoid trouble. The mental toll and overcrowding make it harder than people think.

© Photo: MichelleZoeyGrace5

#26

You can make eyeliner from pencil.

© Photo: User

#27

Most of it has been said already, but a few off the top of my head. Im in the US:

If you dont have money or someone sending you money and you dont have a hustle, you are going to be hungry. The food is a*s, and will not fill you up. In my state you only get two meals on weekends.

Having a hustle is a good idea in general. Some folks write letters, make art, sell items they stole from whatever job they have(Clean/brand new clothes, bleach for washing said clothes yourself-in the sink so they don’t get mixed in with the ones with s**t stains and stuff, any sort of items used to make a tattoo machine are highly valuable, food from the kitchen smuggled back.) Any job where you have access to certain things and aren’t scared to steal can net you some good pull and money.

© Photo: kgore

#28

French prisons have all the d***s, all of them. The guards know it, the director knows it, the government knows it, they don’t try to stop it, stoned prisoners are easyer to manage.

Also everybody has a phone even if it’s forbidden, it reduces the pressure on the parlor wait list.

French prisons are horribly overcrowded.

© Photo: chinchenping

#29

Some prisons have Netflix etc. No choice as to what they put on, but still…

Some prisons even allow old xBox 360 or PlayStation 2 consoles. (Ireland)

© Photo: AlienInOrigin

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