Best Man Wrongly Assumes Groom Will Be Happy For Him To Propose At His Wedding

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Why someone would propose on another couple’s wedding day is beyond me. Not only does it take the spotlight from the newlyweds, who, by the way, paid for the celebration, but it also seems disrespectful and throws the whole party off its tracks.

Redditor Inside-Werewolf-3400 recently shared how his best man ruined his almost-perfect wedding by proposing during the reception. Fuming, he kicked the friend out of the celebration, later wondering if what he did was too harsh.

Proposing during someone else’s wedding is one of the things guests shouldn’t do

Image credits: Josh Kobayashi (not the actual image)

When this groom’s best man did it at his wedding, he immediately kicked him out

Image credits: cait00sith (not the actual image)

Image credits: YuriArcursPeopleimages (not the actual image)

Image credits: Inside-Werewolf-3400

Etiquette experts agree that proposing at someone else’s wedding is a big no-no

With all the love around, it might be tempting to take out the ring box and get down on one knee. However, etiquette experts agree that doing so at someone else’s wedding is a big no-no, especially if the couple hasn’t been warned beforehand.

“It’s in poor taste to announce your big news at someone else’s wedding or special event,” America’s foremost etiquette expert, Jacqueline Whitmore, tells People. “If you announce your own engagement while at a friend’s wedding, instead of focusing on the newlyweds and their relationship, you are choosing to focus on how the couple positively impacts your relationship.”

Even if the couple is already freshly engaged and is excited to share this news with others, they still should wait until the wedding is over, “In short, you are essentially taking the spotlight off the bride and groom and directing it on yourself. This can be perceived as rude, self-centered, and narcissistic. It screams, ‘Look at me. I’m important!’” explains Whitmore.

Besides, the couple put a lot of effort and finances into making their dream day come true, expecting everything to go smoothly, which some may not realize. “Couples and their planners spend months working together to plan and purchase all of these elements and essentials to create their perfect wedding day,” says professional planner Lea Rhynehardt to Knot.

“From a planner’s perspective when we work with our couples we ask the infamous question, ‘what do you envision for your wedding day?’ From experience I’ve never gotten a response where they share that they want their day to be about celebrating another couple or a proposal.”

Your partner deserves to have an engagement that is uniquely yours

In addition, your partner deserves to have an engagement that is uniquely yours. If planning a perfect scenario doesn’t come to you easily, it may be worth hiring some help.

“Contact an event planner to see if they could help you plan your perfect proposal,” Nephthali Ramirez, CEO of Wed With Sister’s Keeper, says. “Don’t just depend on an event that has already been planned so that you don’t have to do much of the planning. Your future spouse is worth the extra thought.”

If your partner doesn’t like public affairs, they might also not appreciate being proposed to in front of a large number of wedding guests. “If you are proposing to a quiet, low-key partner who doesn’t like the spotlight, you would plan a proposal that is special and private, perhaps at home or on top of an isolated mountaintop, as opposed to in front of a group of people or any large public displays,” Brett Galley, director of special events and owner of Hollywood POP Gallery, says.

Essentially, the only proposal rule is to focus on your relationship and what your partner likes (and avoid doing it at someone else’s wedding!). No one knows your partner better than you, so customizing the proposal to their preferences is the most straightforward and effective way to go.

“Find the perfect ring (you may be surprised, but not everyone likes diamonds), choose the location your partner likes, determine ‘your song’ and play in the background while popping the question, add the custom sign with a mindful phrase, add photos in the frames, choose their favorite color for flowers and decor,” advise Julia and Slava Di, owners of Cloud Nine.