Planning a wedding isn’t just about picking flowers or the perfect dress — it’s about navigating a maze of family expectations, old grudges, cultural traditions, and sometimes downright weird opinions about what kind of music someone wants.
With stories of parents trying to take over planning, unnecessarily nasty comments by relatives or just a bunch of petty disagreements, it’s no wonder people joke that “there’s no wedding without drama.”
Unless, you’re eloping, of course but we’re not talking about perfect weddings here.
A couple’s wedding reached peak chaos when the groom’s parents got drunk, stormed off the party over the absence of country music, and later returned to raise some hell.
The drama continued even a week after the wedding, with the groom and his parents still exchanging angry messages.
A couple planned a nice wedding at a campground, inviting all their close relatives and friends
Image credits: Mark Zamora / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
But soon family drama ensued, and continued even a week after the wedding
Image credits: jakerocks2433
The groom’s parents got drunk pretty quickly and chaos followed
Image credits: jakerocks2433
Family conflict is one of the most stressful parts of wedding planning
When two people say “I do”, they’re not just blending their lives, but also their backgrounds and identities — even the wedding party reflects their preferences and traditions.
Decisions like what kind of music or what kind of food and drinks are served may seem like small decisions, but they touch on traditions and the tricky family dynamics.
Some family members might be scared of feeling left out or ignored. Some parents may feel like their opinions should carry more weight because they raised their child, or they’re helping pay for the wedding.
Suddenly, what should be a fun conversation about appetizers turns into a debate about who gets to have the final decision.
All of these little decisions can create a mess at a wedding, and while it might look like people are losing it over food or music, often they’re just trying to feel important — even though it’s really the couple’s day.
“There’s nothing like a wedding to bring up unresolved tensions in a family. Good moments can also make people recall their not-so-good ones,” says Bonnie Maslin, Ph.D, a psychologist and marriage specialist.
In a survey of 1,000 newlyweds throughout the UK, 37% of them said family conflicts were one of the most stressful parts of planning their wedding.
These and other stressors, especially the budgeting aspect during a wedding, are forcing more people to opt for an alternative by choosing small, sometimes surprise ceremonies over lavish, expensive weddings.
Weddings can be joyful with the right boundaries in place
Elopements, sans Vegas, are also on the rise, which has even made all-inclusive elopement and pop-up wedding businesses to swell in popularity.
A survey in the US found that 62% of engaged couples say they’d consider an elopement-style wedding.
“From what I know about millennials, things are tough financially. That’s one of the big reasons (for elopement), in general. People just want to start their life. They don’t feel like they have to follow any sort of traditional norms anymore,” says Jenny MacFarlane, founder of Eloping Is Fun, a New York City–based full elopement service.
But if elopement is not the solution for you, experts and even endless online archives have several tips on how to make your wedding day joyful.
Some quick tips include relying on a friend for counsel and deflection, setting clear boundaries with family members, and making sure you and your partner feel comfortable with all the decisions being made.
“Don’t have a single conversation with your family about wedding details in which you and your fiancé are not united,” says Bonnie Maslin.
At the end of the day, the weddings that usually leave people smiling and where guests can actually enjoy the party, are the ones where people let go of their egos.
And the most important part, everyone remembers what the day is actually about — celebrating two people choosing to share a life together.
The groom gave more updates after the whole wedding drama
Readers responded with empathy and told the groom he wasn’t overreacting at all
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