Family is pretty complicated. We love them deeply, yet we also hurt them—and they hurt us. In this cycle of conflict and connection, we can end up in messy situations that leave lasting wounds.
One teen took to Reddit to share his tumultuous relationship with his mom. According to him, she was a helicopter parent throughout his childhood. Then, after yet another fight, she sent him off to live with his dad and largely stepped back from his life. So when her engagement party rolled around, he reached his breaking point—and ended up ruining the celebration for her.
The community’s reaction was divided. Read the full story below.
The teen had been harboring resentment towards his mom for years
Image credits: NomadSoul1 (not the actual photo)
At her engagement party, something inside him snapped—and he ended up ruining her big day
Image credits: Pressmaster (not the actual photo)
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This situation is messy, and there’s no easy answer
Image credits: Kindel Media (not the actual photo)
The story reveals deep hurt on both sides. On one hand, the teen’s outburst at the engagement party was harsh—he called his mother a horrible parent and left her in tears. On the other hand, while his anger was real, so was the pain he caused.
There are two ways to look at this situation. You could argue that no matter what, the teen overstepped and ruined what should have been a happy occasion for his mother. At the same time, you could argue that no matter what, it was the mom’s responsibility as the adult and parent to work through the conflict despite the hurtful things her son said years ago.
What makes this particularly difficult is the years of distance between them. The teen felt abandoned and replaced, watching his mother build a new family while he struggled. She may have felt overwhelmed by her son’s rejection, leading her to pull away when staying involved might have been harder but more necessary.
The thing is, it doesn’t really change what already happened. It shows just how complicated family can be sometimes. From here, there clearly needs to be a lot of work done if the two want to repair any of the relationship.
What research tells us about parental abandonment
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Did the teen actually get abandoned by his mother? That’s hard to conclude definitively. But when it comes to parental abandonment and rejection, research shows the psychological impact can be significant.
One study published in Healthcare looked at whether feeling rejected by a parent is linked to guilt and shame in teenagers. The researchers found that teens who reported higher levels of parental rejection also reported stronger guilt, meaning they were more likely to blame themselves and feel like they’d done something wrong.
Shame showed a different pattern. In this study, parental rejection on its own didn’t clearly predict higher shame. Instead, shame was more closely tied to the broader conditions kids grew up in: teens raised in institutional care, and those who reported more difficult childhood experiences overall, tended to score higher on shame.
But the effects of abandonment don’t just stay in childhood. They can follow people well into adulthood.
According to the CPTSD Foundation, people who experience parental abandonment often struggle with trusting others. They may fear getting too close in relationships or push people away to protect themselves. Some become people-pleasers or feel deeply insecure in intimate relationships, constantly needing reassurance.
Mental health professionals note that therapists and counselors can help people recognize these patterns and work through the underlying pain. For situations like this one, professional support might be essential for both parties to heal.
Stories like these remind us that family wounds run deep, and making peace with them takes more than a single conversation or apology. It takes time and effort to rebuild what’s been broken.
What do you think? Share your perspective in the comments below.
Reactions were mixed. Some readers felt it was the mom’s responsibility to fix the situation as the adult
Many others, however, thought the teen behaved poorly and was out of line
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