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You get make-up, then you get stage make-up. The latter is a beautiful lie. From the back row of the theater, the performer looks like they have flawless skin, chiselled cheekbones, and eyes that speak a thousand words. Up close? It’s a whole different story. At times, one that could belong in the Rocky Horror Picture Show or Ru Paul’s Drag Race.

The thing is, stage make-up was never made to be subtle nor to slightly accentuate your features. It’s designed to survive blinding lights, beads of sweat and be seen from far, far away. It’s loud, proud, bold and obnoxious. And it prefers an audience rather than a close-up lens.

A woman had the internet in stitches recently when she revealed her panel-beaten face on TikTok shortly after being on stage. “Why did nobody warn me about what stage makeup looked like?” quipped @theyluv.mckayla0. What followed was a string of solidarity posts from people showcasing their stage make-up artists’ theatrics.

Image credits: theyluv.mckayla0

Bored Panda has put together a list of the best pics for you to scroll through ahead of your next trip to the theater. From the utterly hilarious to the downright scary, all are reminders of what it really takes to look human (or not) from fifty feet away. We also speak to make-up artist and owner of The Make-Up Touch agency, Tammy Hardy to get her take on the dos and don’ts of applying stage make-up.

#1 The Teeth Stuff Tasted So Bad Too

If you’ve ever been on stage in a theater production, there’s a high probability that you had to wear makeup, whether you wanted to or not. It’s also not unlikely that you looked in the mirror afterwards and thought, “Oh, wow!” – and not necessarily in a good way.

It’s not always a look you’d comfortably sport while out shopping or on a date. And that’s because, unlike everyday makeup, stage makeup is bold, loud, and thick (for lack of a better word).

“Stage makeup is more dramatic, pigmented and exaggerated to ensure it is visible with the harsh lighting and audience,” explains Tammy Hardy during an interview with Bored Panda, when we ask her to explain the difference between stage makeup and “normal” makeup.

“It is also an important part of the character, defining the personality and role the actor/actress is portraying,” adds Hardy, an experienced make-up artist and owner of The Make-Up Touch agency.

#2 Tell Me About It

#3 Literally (I’m The Bald One)

“The basic concept behind natural makeup is to enhance a person’s natural features and even out skin tone in a way that looks like they’re not wearing much (if any) makeup at all. For street makeup, it’s all about light, subtle application,” explains celebrity makeup artist, Scott Barnes. “Natural stage makeup first neutralizes issues, then enhances features enough to be visible to the camera or viewer.”

While it may look over-the-top up-close, the intensity is often barely noticeable to the audience. There’s a reason people go all out when it comes to applying makeup for theater or stage…

#4 Embrace It

#5 Real

#6 Tell Me Abt It

One reason for big and bold stage makeup is because of the distance between the performer and the audience. Being so far apart means that your facial features, and therefore the emotions on your face, are difficult to see – unless you enhance your features with makeup.

“It needs to be dramatic in order to stand out from a distance, allowing all audience members in the theatre to see the character’s makeup clearly,” says Hardy, adding that lighting also plays a part in stage makeup application.

“It is more bold, exaggerated and thick due to the harsh stage lights that flatten the makeup and drain color,” Hardy tells us. “Certain color lighting effects are also factored in to determine what colors the makeup needs to be.”

#7 Say Less

#8

#9 Grandma In Addams Family

The experts over at JAM Cosmetics agree.

“Stage lighting can really ‘flatten’ your face and take away all of the dimensions that help the audience see your expression clearly,” they say. “Emoting is a huge part of any performance, so improper makeup can really diminish in the audience’s experience.”

Another reason stage makeup is much heavier than everyday makeup is because being under bright, intense lights can make you sweat. And the last thing you need is for your face to be ruined mid-show, or for your eyes to start burning and tearing if sweaty makeup gets into them.

#10 Tell Me About It

#11 My Makeup For Macbeth

#12 Girl I Know

“The makeup needs to be durable so will be applied thicker to withstand heat as it gets very hot under stage lights, sweat, movement and long performances,” Hardy tells Bored Panda.

“Most street makeup brands are not sweat-resistant, meaning you are almost guaranteed to have a mess of makeup when [you are] finished your performance,” JAM’s team adds.

#13 Had To Go Into A Store Looking Like This

#14 Guys Mmm

#15 Sometimes It’s Just Like That

We’re curious to know whether the same principles apply to makeup for film and television, so we ask Hardy.

“TV makeup is high coverage and anti-shine to also factor in strong lighting, but the makeup technique is more refined,” she replies. “The features will be less dramatic and exaggerated. Almost everything is shot in HD so the type of makeup product will also be finer/smaller particle size and the skin texture needs to be smooth, thin and natural looking.”

#16 Tell Me About It

#17 I Get It Queen

#18 Likeee

⁠If your production is running for a few nights, don’t forget about continuity. You wouldn’t want to look different from one show to the next.

“Create a face chart documenting exactly what your makeup will look like,” suggests Hardy. “Work directly from the face chart and take photos from every angle once you have finished your makeup. Also good idea to take a video to reference.”