We could almost write the script ourselves. Person begs for open marriage, realizes it works both ways, quickly regrets it. We’ve seen the story play out so many times before, and still, some people never learn.
A woman has shared how her dad asked her very conservative, Christian mom to spice things up by allowing other people into their relationship. What he didn’t anticipate was that his wife would end up scoring more than he did. Now he’s suddenly furious, going as far as implying that she’s cheating. The daughter has spilled all the tea online.
A conservative woman was mortified when her husband asked for an open marriage
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She reluctantly agreed to it and ended up loving it. Now her husband is furious
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The daughter later revealed that things had taken a wild turn
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Open relationships aren’t as fun as they sound, the experts explain
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An open relationship or marriage is one where you and your partner agree to allow intimate encounters with other people.
“They fall under the ENM (ethically non-monogamous) umbrella,” explains Ashera DeRosa, licensed marriage and family therapist at Whole Stories Therapy, adding that these relationships are sometimes referred to as “monogamish.”
ENM, or consensual non-monogamy (CNM), is based on honesty, and that’s what sets it apart from infidelity, cheating, or any scenario where other intimate connections are kept secret.
Consensual non-monogamy is more common than many people might realize. According to research, around 1 in 5 single American adults have participated in a CNM relationship at some point in their lives.
But while it might seem like fun, games and freedom, experts warn that opening up your relationship can come with risks. Especially if boundaries aren’t clear or both partners aren’t equally invested in the idea.
Some of the pitfalls you could encounter include one or both partners feeling anxiety, fear or jealousy, the risk of sexually transmitted infections or disease and time management/partner commitment challenges.
Then there’s the issue of finances being stretched, with increased expenses for other partners. You may also find yourself in a position of dealing with secondary partners who suddenly decide they want more out of the relationship.
John Kim, aka The Angry Therapist, writes that for an open relationship to work, two people have to not only be on the same page but must truly be honest with themselves. They have to ask themselves if they have the ability, and the inner capacity, to be completely okay with their partner being intimate with others, he advises.
Kim says it’s not a matter of just handling it but it’s also about not allowing it to interfere with them loving their partner as much or even more with this new agreement.
“If you feel intimidated or less than because your partner experienced an orgasm with someone else, then you probably shouldn’t open your relationship,” warns the expert.
“Open marriage, but just for me”: People were quick to point out the man’s double standards
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