Parenting is no walk in the park. It can sometimes feel more like a long marathon without any breaks, and a lot of bruises. You finally get to breathe again once your kids reach adulthood. But that’s not always the case, especially if you have a special-needs child.
Someone has shared how they’ve been “parentified” since the age of 13, and roped in to take care of their brother. He’s non-verbal and has the mental/intellectual capacity of a young child. Because of his violent meltdowns, his sibling is scared of being alone with him. But their parents don’t seem to care. Things took a wild turn when the sibling decided to call adult protective services and report her brother as abandoned.
Your youth is meant to be a time of innocence, freedom, and fun
Image credits: ASphotostudio/Envato (not the actual photo)
But one person has spent their teen years looking after their disabled brother, and has decided enough is enough
Image credits: GSR-PhotoStudio/Envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: NotTerrysCaregiver
Parents of children with disabilities experience higher stress levels than others
Image credits: Freepik (not the actual photo)
Raising children can be stressful at times. You’re responsible for an entire tiny human until they’re old enough to look after themselves. But studies show that parents of children with chronic physical problems like cerebral palsy or blindness experience higher stress levels than other parents. They also face a unique set of obstacles.
One of the challenges is dealing with difficult emotions. “You may feel guilty if you question whether you could’ve prevented your child’s disability. Anxiety and depression can set in if you see your child in pain or struggling with their condition. You may even feel angry or abandoned if you believe you’re not getting support from other family members,” explains helpguide.org.
The site adds that when it comes to parenting children with disabilities that are expected to get progressively worse over time, you may even experience anticipatory grief. In short, you grieve the loss of your child while they’re still alive.
Parents might also struggle to juggle everything. Caring for their child with a disability, work, home, other children, caregiving responsibilities, relationships and their own well-being. “You may be tempted to cut back on sleep, but that will only lead to a host of other issues, like fatigue, higher stress, and a weakened immune system,” warns the site.
Of course, you’ll also need to manage your child’s medical care. According to helpguide.org, navigating the healthcare system can often be an overwhelming experience. And you’ll likely spend lots of time researching treatment options and local resources. That’s apart from scheduling and attending medical appointments.
Parents of children with disabilities are also tasked with advocating for their child. That means speaking up for them at school, social events, or any other setting. And you’ll only be able to do this properly if you educate yourself on your child’s disability, and communicate effectively to others.
“It’s possible that you’ll have to deal with judgments from other people who don’t understand your child’s condition,” notes the site. “From occasional stares from strangers to insults from playground bullies, it can feel as if you have to defend your child from the world.”
For these parents, the challenges continue even when their children are adults…
Image credits: Freepik (not the actual photo)
There are almost one million families in which adults are being cared for by aging caregivers. That’s according to The Arc, a national community-based organization which advocates for people with intellectual and developmental disabilities. The organization adds that about two-thirds of these families have no future care plans in place.
“Parents and their adult children may have aged together and supported one another, but each have their own growing health concerns and limitations,” notes familycaregiversonline.net.
As the parents themselves age, they face increasing concerns about their adult children with special needs. These worries include who will care for their child, where their child will live and what types of services will support their child once they’re no longer able to. Or no longer around.
According to a survey conducted by The Arc, the most common concerns for these parents were related to a lack of quality support, increased social isolation, having no one to help, institutional placement, health deterioration, neglect and/or financial exploitation.
On top of all this, the aging parents might face their own health, well-being and care concerns.
Many people sided with the sibling, even those who work as caregivers
A few netizens disagreed and said the sibling needs a reality check
Some people felt that Terry was the only one not in the wrong
The sibling gave a brief update revealing that they’ve made some major decisions
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