Lying is a natural part of life. Truly, who hasn’t told a little white lie at least once in their lives? According to a recent study, people tell from zero to about two lies per day, and most of them are inconsequential, like saying you liked a gift when you really didn’t.

However, some lies are more serious. They can, in fact, get so serious that folks go on for years without telling other people the truth. Sometimes, that results in pretty hilarious situations; other times – in heartbreaking confusion. At least that’s what we’ve learned when we collected the most interesting answers from threads under questions like: “What is the longest running lie you have ever told?”

Scroll down to see the most inventive and insane reasons people spun the web of lies and the stories about how exactly they were able to pull those lies off.

Discover more in “Nobody Knows It Was Me”: 49 People Confessed Their Longest-Running Lies They’ve Kept Secret

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#1

I was working in a ski rental store at Whister (I’m australian) and we had an older American couple (from the south) come in.

They were amazed at all of the Aussies working there and that we were all on extended holidays. 3 months plus.

“Are you all independently wealthy or something?” They asked

Without a flinch I said, “well, we come from a great country that looks after its people. When we turn 18 the government gifts us $50k each, some use it as a house deposit, some use it to travel. We’re really pretty lucky like that. “

They were gobsmacked but fell for it hook line and sinker. So much so that when I told this to a friend a couple of weeks later, who worked somewhere else on the mountain she said, “you started that?? Someone asked me if this was true just yesterday and I told them of course it’s true.”

For all I know this is still circulating somewhere.

© Photo: anon

#2

In middle school I use to steal quarters from my Dad’s change box and go buckwild on the snack bar at school.

I always had candy wrappers, Doritos bags, and the like in my pockets when my mom did the laundry. When she confronted me about it I said I couldn’t stand litter and picked it all up. She believed it, and to this day still tells every girlfriend I bring home what s thoughtful environmentally conscious little boy I was.

I don’t have the heart to tell her I was just a fat kid and a thief.

© Photo: jacksrenton

#3

When I was like 11, I wanted to get out of school the next day, so on the way home from a superbowl party with my mom I started acting like my stomach hurt, she said she’d give me something at home for my stomachache. Knowing this wouldn’t get me out of school, I started fake crying and said it really really hurts, by this time we were already in the driveway of our apartment, she looked at me and said I’m gonna take you to the hospital but if your faking ,I’m gonna beat you! (mexican household ), so I stuck to my story and continued sobbing and saying it hurts, we get to the hospital and they don’t know what’s wrong with me so they wanna do a cat scan of me, my mom agrees and off I go, after the scan the doctor told us my appendix looked a little inflamed and that they wanted to remove it which means , my heart sank at the news, but I knew I couldn’t confess now I was to deep.

So they schedule the surgery for the next morning , the morning comes and about half my family is there for support and prayer.im super nervous at this point so when the nurse gave me a shot I accidentally tensed up and felt one of the worst pains of my life , they take me into surgery and everything thing went fine,the surgeon even came to recovery and showed me my appendix which was awesome!

I stayed in the hospital for about a day then I went home but before that the doc told my mom I couldn’t go back to school for about two weeks while cuts healed which was also awesome! Even better my church royal ranger group visited me at my house and brought me this big basket filled with snacks and candy. It was the best two weeks of my life, my mom made my brother get me what I wanted cuz she didn’t want me moving around ,I just played video games the entire two weeks,then I had to go back to school.

I’m 22 now and have not told a soul I was faking being sick, I like to think of it as one of my greatest achievements. The end.

TL:DR- faked being sick and went into surgery just to get out of school.

© Photo: anon

#4

When I was a teenager I had a group of friends who liked to just drive around and smoke. My mom would always wait up but since she’s the type who prefers to fall asleep around 9pm she was pretty groggy by the time curfew rolled around. One night I looked at the clock and was going to be late so I called home.

Keep in mind it’s the 90s and we have a landline phone. I have an extension in my room. Mom answers and without thinking-

Me: “Oh, I’ve got the phone, mom. It’s for me. You can go to sleep. Sorry if it woke you up.”

Mom- “you’re home?”

Me: “yeah… Have been for a while. Sorry I thought you were asleep. G’night mom.”

To which she grumbled and fell back asleep.

I snuck in a few hours later through the back sliding door. Did this a few more times throughout high-school. It’d never work now because of cell phones.

Tl:dr- took advantage of outdated phone technology to fool sleepy mom into thinking I made curfew.

© Photo: nowgetbacktowork

#5

A few years ago I was in college and the MLB General managers meetings were going on at a hotel nearby. Since I’m a huge baseball fan I decided to sneak in. I got to the hotel and hung around for a few minutes taking in my surroundings. I saw Bud selig, Nolan Ryan, Billy Beane and others. A few minutes in a was confronted by the hotel staff asking if I was media. As a semi scared 19 year old and lied and said I was part my college’s newspaper and I was reporting on the meetings. The staff immediately believed me without a doubt and we had about a 10 minute conversation how stupid it was for my college to not have credentials. They walked away and someone got my attention from behind and Bud Selig started to talk to me about baseball for 10 minutes. I was writing on my notepad and thanked him for his time. He then introduced me to GM after GM. It was a great experience. Never was extremely happy about lying before but I was this time.

© Photo: anon

#6

Not the biggest lie I’ve gotten away with, but still memorable.

In high school, a couple of my buddies, Mike and Mike came over to hang out while my folks were out. We were in my room, and as usual, they start wrestling. Right when I told them to quit it, Mike lifted Mike up in the air and body slammed him onto my brand new bed. To my horror, the wooden frame splintered and the whole thing came crashing down. Of course, Mike and Mike split.

An hour or so later my mother came home. I approached her and confessed, “Mom? I have to tell you something. Something important.”

“What is it, Tanman?” she asked, already concerned.

“I think you had better come up to my room..” We climbed up the stairs and entered my bedroom… to find it pristine, brand new bed and all. I closed the door and told her, “I think you had better sit down.” Now she was really scared. What had her son done? She tentatively eased down on the bed, when WHUMP! The whole bed splintered and came crashing down! “OMIGOD, MOM are you alright!?!”

I helped pick her off the floor and we stared at the broken bed incredulously. Mom was so furious about her sitting breaking the bed that she screamed bloody at the furniture store until, finally, they replaced it.

I got a new bed, Mom went on a diet and the Mikes got away scott free.

Fortunately, Mom never did follow up with me about what I was going to tell her…

© Photo: tanman1975

#7

My friend and I were ransacking a construction site for signs to decorate his room with (we were 15) and before too long a cop pulls up and asks us what we were doing. My friend freezes up in fear (he was too young for a license), but I found a talent I never knew I had. Without skipping a beat, I thanked the officer for coming and explained that my dad was in charge of the site and had received reports that people were stealing from the site. He asked me to come and clear out some of the signs to keep them safe. The cop agreed that it was a problem, helped us load some of the signs, and thanked us for preventing theft before it occurred.

TL;DR – I convinced the police to help me ransack a construction site.

© Photo: bradalay

#8

I told someone that I was a Norwegian exchange student and they believed me for 2 years. You should know that I’m Chinese and I’m from Philadelphia and I don’t speak Norwegian.

© Photo: LEIFey

#9

I have a hilarious cousin. It was near the end of high school and everyone had to do this business interview as part of his school’s requirements, and he completely forgot. You were supposed to be dressed in business attire, and he showed up in shorts and sandals. So he pretended to be a Russian exchange student, he talked with an accent and pretended those clothes were appropriate where he came from. The person interviewing him was from outside the school, so she didn’t know he was lying. She totally believed everything he said, and later when the administration found out, they were so amused that he didn’t face any consequences. I’m pretty sure he had to redo the interview, though.

© Photo: PM_ME_NICOLAS_CAGE

#10

I have a huge scar on my back from surgery in my childhood; from one side all the way around to my chest. It’s stretched and looks crazy.

Since I’m from the Northern California coast, the vast majority of people I’m acquainted with after high school think that it’s from a great white shark attack while surfing as a child. I’ve gotten so deep into the lie that I have formulated the entire situation in my head and can recite the scenario perfectly.

It’s now a lie I can’t undo.

© Photo: foreverhalcyon8

#11

After my freshman year of college, I took a road trip across the country with my friend Oliver. We never stayed in a hotel, we always stayed with distant relatives or slept in my car in Walmart parking lots.

One night, we stayed with my Aunt Eva. We were tired when we arrived at Eva’s house, so when she asked us how “Life at Harvard” was, we just smiled and said “good.”

The next morning she started asking us tons of questions about Boston and Harvard. I didn’t go to Harvard. I went to *Harvey Mudd.* I’d never been to Boston, Harvey Mudd is in California.

Not only did she think I was a Harvard student, but some how, she had gotten the idea that I was majoring in Psychology (I majored in physics), and she wouldn’t shut up about how I should Psychoanalyze her son (He threw the family cat out of the second story window).

Oliver and I both knew it was too late to correct her, and I didn’t think it even mattered.

Later that year, at the family Christmas reunion, *everyone* asked me about how life at Harvard was. and Eva had told *everyone* I was majoring in Psychology at Harvard. So I went along with it. My parents never caught on somehow and my whole extended family thinks I went to Harvard.

© Photo: IXaggerate

#12

I jokingly told all my friends and family I was gay so they’d stop bugging me about finding a girl… They believed it so I continued it ..

Been going in 2 years and they are all 100% convinced I’m gay.

© Photo: TannerTwaggs

#13

I never wear matching socks because I’m too lazy to roll them up together after laundry. This has been going on since I was in middle school. At age 14, my best friend (who is still my best friend) made fun of me for not wearing matching socks. I didn’t feel like explaining so I got teary eyed and told her I was color blind and really sensitive about it. After that I would ask her what colors are and what matches for a few months and then completely forgot about it.

Fast-forward to TEN years later. I’m 24 and in her kitchen and her mom says “sweetie your socks don’t match” my friend immediately snaps and goes “MOM, she’s colorblind!” I then remembered what I told my friend 10 years ago. Her mom asked me if it were true and I laughed and responded with “I can’t lie to you, I can see colors just fine.”

In retrospect, I guess she always has been super helpful in picking my outfits!

I also realize that women generally can’t be colorblind, she brought this up when I first told her and I said it wasn’t related to the receptors in my eyes, but a mutation in my occipital lobe.

TL;DR – Didn’t want to explain why my socks didn’t match, so I pretended to be colorblind for a decade.

© Photo: mmacaronnie

#14

“It’s not you, it’s me.”

It was her.

© Photo: rufusthelawyer

#15

I had everybody convinced I was straight for 20 years haha. Actually convinced though, not like the “well he’s probably gay but we will let him tell us” situation. My older brother by 3 years was the only person that actually had thought about the possibility in the past. But I think that was because we were a lot alike, but he was a ladykiller and I barely showed interest in romance at all. And I’m just as good looking as he is, so he probably figured I could have a decent girl if I actually wanted one. And of course teenage boys want one.

© Photo: CallHimFuzzy

#16

Since the age of 4 I’ve been telling people I have no sense of smell. My parents, friends and even girlfriends all think I can’t use my nose.

The reality is it’s been going on so long since I was growing up I can’t tell people I love the smell of sausage rolls and washing powder. People have no idea, in a way it’s the perfect lie.

© Photo: Dayvihd

#17

My work history on my resume covers some holes with companies that are “no longer in business”.

© Photo: dummystupid

#18

“No, Mom, I’m just holding it for a friend”.

© Photo: crimsonandred88

#19

I had my little brother completely convinced that I was one of Santa’s elves until he was about 16. Which is spectacularly impressive as he stopped believing in Santa when he was about 8.

© Photo: CodexAngel

#20

Back in the day I didn’t want to go to school, called my mom and told her the dog got out and I was out looking for him. She called me in late and I went to school for the last hour.

© Photo: 44in313

#21

I’m qualified for this job.

© Photo: anon

#22

Throwaway for obvious reasons, about ten years ago me and my best friend were out cruising around one night in his car when he spotted some people he used to know from high school hanging out in the mall parking lot.

He told me they used to bully him and wanted to get them back some day. So I was like “why not tonight?” Anyway we went out and found some of the best throwing rocks we could find and did a “drive by”, we hit one of them in the head and busted several windows, there were about three cars there. So they start chasing us, like a real high speed out for blood car chase. Blowing through stop lights, weaving through traffic.

Anyway, me and my friend end up crashing into a power pole, the transformer on top of it exploded, it looked like a lightning strike that lasted five seconds. it knocked out power in the mall (which was open at the time) and a few hundred houses. I guess when the guys saw the explosion they decided they wanted no part of that and drove away. Before the cops got there me and my friend decided we didn’t want to get in trouble for throwing the rocks so we would just make up [something] about a guy with a big beard in a blue dodge truck chasing us and running us into the pole for no reason. None of us knew anyone that matched that description. So that’s what we ended up telling the cops.

One week later there was a blue dodge truck involved in a homicide and when I saw the pic of the guy’s mugshot in the paper I couldn’t believe it. The guy had a big beard and perfectly matched our [nonsense] description, so the police call us in and ask us if it’s the same guy and we were like “ummm well it was dark so it’s hard to tell but they look pretty similar”. They guy ends up confessing to running us off the road as part of a plea bargain and his insurance had to pay for my friend a new car and all the property damage, including a lawsuit from the mall for lost revenue. The guy is still in jail to this day and no one knows what really happened except me, my friend, and his high school bullies…..

© Photo: thwawaybiglie111

#23

I once told some kids lighting fireworks at Devil’s Lake State Park that I was an off duty park ranger and that if they gave me their fireworks they wouldn’t get officially reported.

They gave them to me and let me search their backpack and I said they were good to go. And that is how I impersonated a federal officer for my own gain.

EDIT: It is in fact a state park.

© Photo: LeConnor

#24

This lie is still continuing, and I sort of regret it now. I speak relatively fluent French, and my friend Olyvia and I used to practice together, especially on CVS runs to the store down the street. I would speak only French, and she would have to interpret what I was saying (she had difficulty in the class, so it gave her some good practice with it).

At the checkout register, the cashier asked where in France I was from. Quickly lying, I adopted a French accent and replied, “Lyon, I am here for University.” (It should also be noted that I was a Theater geek in HS) She replied that she had spent some time bouncing around Europe, and that she knew a little French. She said “Merci, o, wait, that doesnt sound very good” to which I told her it sounded great.

tl;dr- I now have to pretend I’m a French girl in CVS.

© Photo: curvy_lady_92

#25

I travelled under a fake name because I got a free ticket interstate from someone and didn’t want to pay the transfer fees. I’d hoped that I wouldn’t be asked for ID but I was. By chance, the person who gave me the ticket had the same first name as me so I simply told the airline staff that I’d just been married and hadn’t changed the name on my ID yet. I invented this whole backstory of where my new husband was, why I didn’t have a marriage certificate etc all for a free trip.

Got away with it, too.

© Photo: anon

#26

I once told a girl I was a lion tamer to get in her pants.

© Photo: anon

#27

I was sentenced to 30 days in juvenile hall when I was 15 or so. I was completely dreading it and was supposed to start serving 2 days at a time on weekends.

So for 15 weeks, I would have no weekends at all, which as a kid seemed like an eternity, and completely unfair.

I got a new probation officer/supervisor sometime before starting my jail time, and we were going over the things I needed to do before I could get off. “Looks like you paid your fines, that’s good, and you’re attending the classes, that’s good. How about the 30 days, did you complete that?”

I looked him right in the eye and said “Yep, that’s done too.”

And that was that. Never heard another thing about it. I was amazed that it worked, but very relieved.

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© Photo: striapach

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