Some women proudly avoid domestic duties, while others, known as “trad wives,” openly embrace them as their sole purpose.
A “trad wife,” short for traditional wife, refers to a married woman who stays home to manage the household and raise multiple children, while her husband financially supports the family. The movement has surged online, fueled by stay-at-home moms who celebrate vintage homemaking, from baking fresh bread to wearing floaty, 1950s-inspired dresses.
Although the lifestyle has enthusiastic fans, the conservative, far-right “trad wife” subculture has stirred controversy: Is it empowering nostalgia, a reimagined form of femininity, or a flashpoint in the ongoing gender roles debate?
In this piece, we’ll explore the polished domestic aesthetic, rigid gender dynamics, and fiery online discourse driving the modern “trad wife” phenomenon.
Suddenly, Everyone Has an Opinion on Trad Wives Thanks to Alena Kate Pettitt
Alena Kate Pettitt, a self-described “trad wife,” is widely credited with sparking the resurgence of traditional gender roles online. She’s one of the earliest and most visible figures in a growing movement of women who proudly stay home while their husbands manage the finances (per The New Yorker).
Image credits: thedarlingacademy / Instagram
Pettitt rose to global recognition in 2020 after expressing her genuine desire to serve her husband in a BBC News video.
Her aspirations as a homemaker go back long before viral fame. Pettitt has often said she would prefer the postwar era of devoted wives to today’s world of “strong, independent women.”
“If you put me in a time machine back to the fifties, I’d have it made,” she remarked. “Everyone wouldn’t be asking me when I’m going back to work.”
The Cotswolds native believes the modern world overlooks housewives, unlike the past, when their domestic efforts earned them magazine spreads and advertising gigs. “At least she was seen,” Pettitt pointed out.
After leaving a marketing career behind, Pettitt embraced the role of household “CEO.” She says this lifestyle is more fulfilling than answering to a boss obsessed with “profit margins” (per The Sun).
“If my husband wants to ‘pay me’ to stay at home doing the things I need to do to make sure my child and I survive, and all I have to do is lay out one extra plate and make sure his underpants are clean, that’s a trade I’m more than happy with!” she said.
Outside her domestic duties, Pettitt runs The Darling Academy, a blog where she coaches other stay-at-home wives on everything from child-rearing to homemaking. She even shares tips on “how to dress like a trad wife.”
Image credits: thedarlingacademy / Instagram
Writing on her site about why she’s “happy and proud to be a submissive housewife,” Pettitt explained, “It swings in my favour nine times out of ten. I’m doing something I LOVE to do, and in a roundabout way, I’m getting paid to do it! Smart.”
She added, “Our laundry is always done, the fridge is always full, dinner is always on the table, and each of us know where we stand.”
Pettitt exemplifies the very definition of “trad wife,” as defined by the Cambridge Dictionary: a “married woman, especially one who posts on social media, who stays at home doing cooking, cleaning, etc. and has children that she takes care of.”
Hannah Neeleman Turns Farm Life Into a Pageant and a Lightning Rod
Image credits: ballerinafarm / Instagram
With more than 10 million followers on Instagram and TikTok, Hannah Neeleman has drawn massive attention for her idyllic life on a Utah farm. Her blend of rural charm and domestic content has helped shape both the aesthetic and criticism of the “trad wife” trend (per PEOPLE).
The mother of eight gained a massive following by posting scenes from her family’s life and from Ballerina Farm, the business she runs with her husband.
Though often linked to the trad wife phenomenon, Hannah insisted she does not identify with the term. Instead, she says she’s simply “doing what God wants.”
Image credits: ballerinafarm / Instagram
The former pageant queen and ballerina gave up her previous life to move to a 328-acre farm, where she now prefers cooking hearty meals, milking cows, and homeschooling her kids.
In July 2024, The Times dubbed her “The Queen of the tradwives,” a title Hannah rejected in an Instagram post that she described as an attack on her family.
“We thought the interview went really well,” she said. “We were taken aback, however, when we saw the printed article, which shocked us, and shocked the world.”
Supportive followers rallied behind her. One criticized the magazine, calling its publisher a “failed, envious creature with no family.”
Another fan wrote, “She is a free woman who chooses how to live her life. She has financial success, creates value through her content and products, and is generating even more wealth. She runs a business, has a large family, and balances it all in her own way.”
A third added, “Even if that angle was true, we’d still love you.”
Image credits: ballerinafarm / Instagram
Despite her curated life, Hannah acknowledged her sacrifices. “I gave up dance, which was hard,” she admitted. “You give up a piece of yourself.”
Still, she considers marrying her husband only months after meeting him to be “the best decision” of her life. They had always dreamed of raising a big family, so “we left it in God’s hands.”
Nara Smith Channels “Old-Fashioned” Into Influencer Gold
Heartfelt home cooking, tender family moments, and a calming voice have helped Nara Smith rise to influencer stardom (per Vogue Business).
Image credits: naraaziza / Instagram
In a sea of TikTok trends, Nara stood out by transforming retro-inspired homemaking into viral content and big-brand partnerships.
Her creativity caught the eye of Marc Jacobs, for whom she filmed a unique campaign that pulled in $966,000 in media impact value on TikTok and $285,000 on Instagram within just two days.
Despite her sharp business instincts, the 23-year-old wife of Mormon model Lucky Blue Smith has been targeted with unwanted “trad wife” labels.
On a July 9, 2025, episode of the Jay Shetty Podcast, Nara responded to the assumptions. “There’s nothing truly traditional about us as a couple, apart from maybe that we chose to have kids young and get married young. But apart from that, we split chores 50/50,” she said.
Image credits: naraaziza / Instagram
Nara, who has stated she is not a “hardcore Mormon,” continued, “There’s things that Lucky does that I guess traditional men wouldn’t do. Like do the dishes or get the kids dressed or do their hair, or whatever it may be that people don’t associate with a traditional man.”
She married at 18, has three children, and is now expecting a fourth “surprise” baby (per PEOPLE).
After five years together, the couple developed their own set of “unspoken rules,” including one firm line on driving.
“One thing I do is I drive, no matter what,” Lucky explained in a clip on Nara’s TikTok. “I really get bothered when I see girls driving a guy. I don’t know why, I just don’t like it.”
“I always do the dishes,” he added.
Followers flooded the comments with admiration and jokes. “This is why Nara stays pregnant,” one wrote, referring to the royal treatment she seems to receive.
Social media star Haley Kalil added, “I want this kinda unspoken connection,” punctuated with a teary emoji.
Regardless of whether she qualifies as a trad wife, Nara thrives in her role. She’s filmed domestic clips in Chanel and Rodarte, and has partnered with high-fashion labels including Prada and Isabel Marant.
Estee Williams Throws TikTok Into a Frenzy Over the S Word
Estee Williams has become one of TikTok’s most talked-about figures after declaring her life’s “purpose” is to serve and submit to her husband in a post.
The self-described “Stay at Home Mama” shared how she went from college-bound meteorology student and fitness model to full-time homemaker.
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“A couple [of] years ago, I was in college pursuing meteorology. That was considered great. I was into the bodybuilding industry and I was into fitness modeling. That was awesome,” she recalled.
“However, when I decide I want to drop out of college and become a traditional wife, and my only goal in life is to be an amazing wife and mother, that’s when eyebrows seem to raise.”
In early 2025, Williams and her husband appeared on Dr. Phil to debate the trad wife lifestyle.
“You actually go on social media and promote this, right?” Dr. Phil asked, highlighting the contradiction between her influencer success and housewife branding.
“Yes, I do,” she responded.
“And that’s kind of a job,” he pressed. Williams shrugged it off: “It’s more of a hobby.
@esteecwilliams Dress: MissCandyFloss on Instagram #tradwife #traditionalwife #traditionalmarriage #homemaker #traditionalvalues #tradlife #dollyourselfup #dressup ♬ Come and Get Your Love – Redbone
With over 100,000 followers on Instagram, close to 200,000 on TikTok, and 65,000 YouTube subscribers, Williams revealed she earns between $50 and $180 monthly from TikTok and about $300 from YouTube.
In one clip, she lip-synced to “Money, Money, Money” while confessing that her dream had always been to become a wife and mother. Red flag emojis poured in.
Image credits: esteecwilliams / Instagram
Some commenters took issue not with her message but with her wardrobe. “Put some damn clothes on!” one user demanded.
What It’s Really Like to Be a Trad Wife
The spotless kitchens and vintage dresses seen in “trad wife” posts rarely reflect the real grind behind domestic life.
For British Vogue, Paris-based journalist and influencer Monica Ainley documented her weeklong experience living as a traditional wife, and the outcome was far from romantic.
Her first day began with optimism but quickly turned into frustration. A “pang of jealousy and apprehension” hit as she folded laundry all day, only to watch her children immediately undo her efforts.
By day two, her kids behaved better than usual, and her husband “would be fed like a king.” Ainley wrote, “I feel deeply needed. Maybe it’s not so bad after all?”
Valentine’s Day landed on day three. Instead of roses and romance, Ainley faced emotional neglect. “He seems to be leaning into his role, happy to answer questions about his day but forgetting to ask me about mine. I feel dull, kinda dead inside,” she admitted.
She also found herself apologizing for forgetting to bring condiments to the table.
By day four, she poured herself a glass of wine at 4 p.m. to escape her kids’ foul moods. On her birthday, she couldn’t go out until she served a hot meal.
Reflecting on the experience, Ainley wrote, “Maybe I’ll amend my first rule of feminism to ‘don’t knock it until you’ve tried it.’ And now that I have, I know one thing for sure. If my daughter one day expresses an interest in the trad wife life, I will steer her in a different direction.”
What Online Fame Really Means for Trad Wives
“Jennie, you’re not gonna be the president when you grow up. You’re going to be a mommy, like me. Heavenly Father made you to be a mommy.” That was the message a former self-identified “trad wife” recalled hearing from her tearful mother when she expressed childhood dreams of becoming president (per NPR).
Though many online “trad wives” present a picture of fulfillment, Jennie Gage shattered the illusion by sharing the difficult reality behind the lifestyle (per PEOPLE).
The Arizona mother of five appeared on the Tamron Hall show in spring 2024, admitting she had been “gaslighting” herself before walking away from her traditional role.
@lifetaketwo Biblical marriage is not teh flex anyone thinks it is. #bible #tradwife #marriage #sahm #relationships #couple #wedding #home #family #mom #christian #mormon #cults #church #god #jesus #feminist #atheist #exevangellical #exmo #wife #sahm ♬ original sound – Jennie
“My kids were all beautiful and accomplished and it looked like the perfect life,” she said. “Instead of seeing this isn’t working, it was ‘Look how beautiful it is.’”
Gage revealed she left the church and nearly didn’t survive her mental health battle during that period.
Image credits: lifetaketwojennie and gigiandtheglow / Instagram
In a more recent moment of trad wife backlash, JoJo Siwa drew outrage for debuting a 1930s-style makeover.
@itsjojosiwaAfter performing this song live and then seeing the beautiful response to it, I decided to go record a studio vocal…. I’m undecided if I should release it on Spotify or not…. Would you want me to?!!!🤍 if you would, I’m thinking maybe end of this week?♬ original sound – JoJo Siwa
“If heartbreak had a portrait, it’d be this,” one user wrote beneath her video, which featured her cover of “Bette Davis Eyes.”
“She’s in her trad wife era,” another commented.
“This has to be the longest humiliation ritual ever,” a third user added.
The online world isn’t kind to perceived female submission. Parody accounts mocking the trad wife aesthetic regularly go viral.
“If heartbreak had a portrait, it’d be this,” one user wrote beneath her video, which featured her cover of “Bette Davis Eyes.”
“She’s in her trad wife era,” another commented.
“This has to be the longest humiliation ritual ever,” a third user added.
The online world isn’t kind to perceived female submission. Parody accounts mocking the trad wife aesthetic regularly go viral.
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from Bored Panda /trad-wife/
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