Lady Gets Pressured By Ex’s New Wife Wanting Full Control Over Her Kids, Court Takes Mom’s Side

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Statistics are merciless and inexorable—no matter how sincerely we swear eternal love at the altar, the divorce rate nowadays is 2.5 per 1,000 population. That’s lower than a quarter of a century ago, but still a hell of a lot. And where there are divorces, there are remarriages and, of course, the problem of stepmothers and stepfathers to kids.

Children often have conflicts with step-parents, and there are many studies explaining this from a psychological point of view. However, there are also reverse cases, when, for example, a stepmother tries so hard to become a “true, decent mom” for the kids and perceives their biological mom as a “problem.” This happened in a situation with user u/InternationalTaro233, the author of today’s tale.

More info: Reddit

The author of the post is a mom of 2 sons, who she’s co-parenting with her ex-partner

Signing of a divorce decree, highlighting family dynamics and stepmom bonding challenges.

Image credits: Kaboompics.com / Pexels (not the actual photo)

The ex-spouses stayed on good terms but everything changed when the man re-married a few years ago

Text discussing a mom refusing sympathy to her kids' stepmom over bonding issues.

Text discussing a mom's refusal to allow their kids' stepmom to manage all communication.

Text message recounting stepmom's attempts to bond with her husband's children, shared out of annoyance.

Text excerpt discussing a mom's refusal to sympathize with her kids' stepmom about bonding issues.

Image credits: InternationalTaro233

A man and woman having a serious conversation in a modern living room, illustrating parenting challenges with a stepmom.

Image credits: Alex Green / Pexels (not the actual photo)

That lady always tried to push the author out of her kids’ lives, trying to impose herself as their “true mom”

Text about a mom's co-parenting issues with her kids' stepmom, discussing lack of sympathy and bonding challenges.

Text discussing stepmom's frustration over parental access restrictions and lack of bonding with her partner's kids.

Text conversation about a stepmom introducing herself as the mom at events, lacking sympathy from the biological mother.

Text discussing court ruling about children's stepmom not having parental rights.

Image credits: InternationalTaro233

Gavel on a desk with a person working on a laptop in the background, symbolizing decision-making and authority.

Image credits: Sora Shimazaki / Pexels (not the actual photo)

The parents ended up in court several times over this—and each time, the judge sided with the boys’ real mom

Text discussing legal restrictions on a stepmom who claimed to be the kids' real mom in front of a judge.

Text about mom not sympathizing with kids' stepmom struggling to bond, mentions co-parenting and focusing on the kids.

Text about family therapy failing to help kids bond with their stepmom.

Text describing a mom's interaction with her kids' stepmom about bonding challenges.

Image credits: InternationalTaro233

Two women in a serious conversation at home, highlighting a stepmom bonding issue.

Image credits: Kaboompics.com / Pexels (not the actual photo)

It turned out that the new wife couldn’t have her own biological kids, and they were rejected for adoption—so the issues went on

Text about a mom unwilling to show sympathy to her kids' stepmom over bonding issues.

Text exchange highlights tension between mom and kids' stepmom over bonding issues.

Text questioning maturity and seeking judgment about a reaction toward kids' stepmom bonding attempts.

Image credits: InternationalTaro233

Recently, after having a spat with the husband, the lady showed up at the author’s place, seeking her compassion—but was just brushed off

So, the Original Poster (OP) is now 33 years old, and seven years ago, she split up with her partner, leaving their two sons—now 11 and 9 years old—in a co-parenting situation. The author claims that they split up peacefully, and for the first few years, they were on good terms, sharing the responsibilities of raising their kids. Until a few years ago, when the man found himself a new wife…

This woman, as it turned out, was overly zealous in her role as a stepmom to the children, always trying to push our heroine out of the upbringing process. She tried to impose herself on the boys as “their true mom,” which, of course, they didn’t like—and she took any contact between the original poster and her sons to heart.

The case even went to court several times—and each time, despite the woman’s desperate attempts to present herself as the only real mom, the judge invariably upheld the verdict in favor of the OP. Things got even worse when it turned out that the new wife couldn’t have her own biological children, and they were rejected for adoption. The OP probably thinks that the spouses began having arguments over this.

So, one day, this lady went to our heroine’s house and, upset, literally demanded some compassion from her. But, of course, she didn’t get what she was looking for. The author didn’t want to support the person who had been consistently making her life miserable for years, so she simply rolled her eyes at her and left, leaving the lady to shower her with insults outside.

However, after some time, our heroine’s ex called her and said that she owes his wife an apology for rolling her eyes at her, and in general, in his personal opinion, she should grow up a little. The author, however, completely disagreed with this—so she simply decided to seek support online.

A concerned woman touching her forehead, illustrating tension in a conversation about bonding with stepchildren.

Image credits: noxos / Freepik (not the actual photo)

“Apparently, this woman felt insecure over her possible issues with having her own biological children – and tried to compensate for this by imposing herself as a mother on her stepkids,” says Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, who Bored Panda asked for a comment here. “It’s not surprising that nothing good came of it.”

“This attitude looks like an obsession, and one should distinguish between simply being a decent stepmom and trying to replace a real mom for the kids. And the subsequent events—when this woman tried to find sympathy from the person she had been pestering for so long—this is only confirmation that the problem is precisely in her emotional state.”

“I think it’s worth advising this woman to undergo therapy, to understand her own problems, what’s in her own head—and then try to solve subsequent issues. In any case, I do think it was not for nothing that the guardianship authorities rejected this couple’s adoption papers…” Irina ponders.

Commenters also supported the OP, assuring her that she had done the right thing all along by defending her sons and her parenthood. And that there can be no compassion for someone trying to push her out of her own kids’ lives. Some folks even felt it was necessary to get the police involved. “I think you need a no contact order against her,” someone added. And do you, our dear readers, agree with this?

People in the comments supported our heroine, also urging her to get a no-contact order against the lady

Text exchange about stepmom not bonding with kids and mom refusing sympathy.

Reddit comment discussing stepmom bonding issues and security, highlighting mom’s lack of sympathy.

Comment discussing stepmom's struggles with bonding with kids, reflecting skepticism and concern.

Reddit comment reads: "NTA, she's a fruitcake," with 2.2k points from User Turbulent_Ebb5669.

Comment addressing a stepmom's struggles to bond with kids and lack of sympathy from their mother.

Reddit comment discussing mom's reaction to kids' stepmom whining about bonding issues.

Comment criticizing sympathy towards kids' stepmom for lack of bonding.

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