Hindsight is, reportedly, 20/20 but there are always a few things people have gone through that stuck with them. More often than not, it’s the things that weren’t done or the people who weren’t spoken to that end up haunting someone in the long run. Regrets are painful, but a part of life all of us have to face.
Someone asked “What is your biggest regret in life?” and netizens shared what was on their hearts. So get comfortable as you scroll through, upvote your favorites and be sure to comment your own thoughts and experiences below.
More info: Quora
#1
When I was in my late 20s, my husband and I were living in St. Paul, MN. Around dusk one late autumn day we pulled up to a convenience store and I my husband ran in to purchase something while I waited in the car. It was a chilly evening and a cold drizzle was turning into a rain storm. I noticed a girl, about 15 or 16, shivering under the building’s eaves trying to avoid the now driving rain. She wasn’t wearing a coat and her jeans and t-shirt were soiled and raggedy. I tried to see her more clearly through the wet windshield and it looked as though there might be bruises on one side of her face and that she was bleeding from a cut on her lip. As I watched, she started to cry. I struggled with a profound desire to help this girl and an equally strong fear of not knowing what to do. I sat rooted in my warm, dry car unable to make the decision to get out and approach her. Then my husband returned. I couldn’t even articulate to him the moral impass I was in. He started the car and we proceeded on our way.
The memory of that young woman huddled against the plate glass storefront, looking utterly alone and bone-cold has haunted me for 40 years. How many evenings have I gone to bed wondering what was going on with her and what became of her? How my times have I asked myself what stopped me from getting out of the car? Perhaps I should not consider this as something to regret as it deeply affected the rest of my life. I am a much more empathetic person than I might have otherwise been and have never allowed myself to fear helping another person again. But still, I DO truly regret not going out into the rain that evening.
Image credits: Margaret Zahn
#2
There’s this girl. She was a smart, intelligent and caring soul. Every summer when we met, she would make sure I was the happiest person on this planet. She would talk to me for hours! She loved me and I loved her back.
Two summers back, she called me all of a sudden. She asked,”Why are you not here to see me? Come soon.” I had traded my visit for an internship half way across the country, so I coolly replied,”Very soon!” She calmly said an OK, and we hung up.
Two days later, she passed away. By the time I reached, her last rites were done with. The girl was my Grandmother. I wish I had gone visiting her instead.
Image credits: Akshay Goyal
#3
Long story short, I have a skin condition that results in white patches almost all over my body . All my life ,while in school, I tried my best to hide these white patches which i thought were unpleasant looking . Not with makeup but with full sleeved clothes , hair over my forehead and all other ideas that could hide or camouflage those white spots .
With years passed, the urge to hide them has faded now . I wear whatever I wanna wear , my hair is neatly done and not over my face . in simple words , I have grown out of that dark phase when I wasn’t confortable in my own skin.
Now I am 22 . I recently joined a swimming class for the first time in my life . And we know how swimming costumes are! My arms , legs and my back were quite visible in that costume . The first day when i stepped out wearing that costume , I looked for people staring at my different skin … I looked …and looked but no one seemed to be paying attention . All of them minded their own business . One girl complimented me on my costume and I have been swimming like that since that day without any kind of embarrassment or shame about my skin .
I felt relieved but something hit me hard . What about all those years of excruciating mental pain i endured in hiding my spots .
No one told me there was no need to hide them .
No one told me , there was no need to wear stockings in the month of June .
Sadly , I cant go back in time and tell my younger self all this . This is my biggest regret. Atleast . One of my biggest regret . It is a lesson I learnt late . Late like a sailor’s message that arrived when the sailor had already drowned .
But , if you are reading this and if you are someone going through a similar phase or you know someone who is going through this . Stop them . take a moment to tell them how redundant and unnecessary it is to hide something that is an integral part of them .
Image credits: Vani Mishra
#4
I started smoking at age 11. I’m now 66 and have emphysema. It’s a cruel way to die. There are so many things I can’t do anymore without gasping for breath. I’m glad I have no kids or grandkids as there’s no way I’d be able to spend time doing things with them.
Image credits: Mick P
#5
When my first son was a child, I was a law student and also the sole breadwinner in the family. So, I left him with caretakers and took off. I spent days away from him. Returning home exhausted and cuddling him briefly before passing out. He spent days planted in front of TV in his little walker, not going anywhere, not doing anything. As a result, he suffered a delay in his development that we are now working hard to undo.
My biggest regret in life is that I haven’t found a way to both provide for him and raise him.
Image credits: Elena Ledoux
#6
Not taking pictures.
Whenever I saw people taking pictures/selfies, I was thinking: “Oh how dumb they are, you have to enjoy the moment not take pictures”. Now I realise that I am the dumb one.
I never took my camera with me on any memorable event. Yes, I still can remember what happened but my memory is not perfect and memories do fade.
Now I want to remember how my great grandmother used to bake her special cake. How she used to watch my siblings, but I never recorded it, and she is no longer around.
I want to remember how my boyfriend and I used to feed squirrels that time we went to Bristol. But I didn’t record it, and now he is not around either. How we travelled around and explored. But all I have is memories that are fading.
See, I can’t remember how green was the grass that day in the park in Bristol, or what my great grandma was wearing. I have a vague idea but I want to see how it happened.
Now I understand why my dad records everything, but in the past I was ashamed of him taking a camera with him everywhere.
I think now its time to record my memories.
Image credits: Danna Bolat
#7
Not marrying my Girlfriend.
We were together for more than 2 years and she was the only girl i know that loved me more than anyone i have ever loved. Her love was unconditional and pure and we were so desperate to marry each other. Somehow we knew we were both perfect for each other and would be so happy together, always.
There was only one problem, the problem was me. My family is extremely orthodox and i loved my father so much that i had promised myself that i will marry a girl that he selects for me. Now don’t get me wrong, when my girlfriend and i came close, i explained this very clearly to her. We both were however so much in love with each other that we couldn’t stop and agreed that the relation would end when one of us gets married.
Unfortunately i got married first and those months were the most painful of our life.
After 8 years and a divorce later, that is the biggest regret of my life.
Image credits: Anonymous
#8
I made my mother’s Facebook account.
Image credits: Somya Aggarwal
#9
My biggest regret is not inviting my son’s father to our family photo shoot. The photo shoot was a gift from my sister. I guess I didn’t want to ask because I didn’t want to deal with the logistics of getting him and the photographer in the same place at the same time. Logistics was often frustrating with him.
Little did I know that he would die that same year. I don’t have single good pic of the two of them together. It would have meant a lot to my son.
My son’s dad was only 43 when he died of a heart attack. I thought I would have another opportunity. I was wrong. It’s definitely my biggest regret.
#10
I’m a single gay man. One of my life’s regrets is that I never had children. I don’t dwell on the subject because that’s water under the bridge, but I think I would have been a great father.
Image credits: FunGayGuy
#11
After a year in Vietnam, I came home and met a woman that I really grew to love, and I ended up marrying her. But without realizing I had PTSD, I pushed her and our sons away by drinking and staying away from home so much that she left me. Eventually, my sons also left me, and now I have no relationship with any of them.
Image credits: Charles Riley
#12
I never forgave my wife.
My high school sweetheart and I had a son when we were just 17. We got married at 19. At 21 she cheated on me. Because I wanted to stay near my son I stayed with her but I was never able to forgive her. After her infidelity she became a great wife and was always a wonderful mother but still I couldn’t let go of the past. It took many years but we finally divorced after my son was grown. Since our divorce, 5 years ago, I have been miserable. I miss her terribly. We are still friends and talk regularly but I hate that I could never forgive her. I am more unhappy without her than I was with her. I truly wish I could have found a way to get over it while we were still together.
#13
Not speaking up
Not speaking up, when my parents asked what I wanted to do for life.
Not speaking up, when I learnt engineering is not my cup of tea.
Not speaking up, when I was asked if I wanted to do something else (career-wise).
Not speaking up, when my relationship was going down.
Not speaking up, when everyone was asking ‘what’s wrong’.
Not speaking up, when I was told to speak up.
Life would’ve been different, a lot different.
#14
My dad had called me up and he was asking me about my health as I was pregnant at that time. After a while he said he had to disconnect as he had to go for an emergency (he was a doctor ).
Before disconnecting my call, he asked me to take care of myself, my unborn child and my mom too. I asked him what made him say that I should take care of my mom too when she was with him.
He told me that he just felt like saying it. I told him that I am coming to him and mom in a couple of months and I expect a lot of pampering from him, mom and my siblings for myself and my unborn child.
He said that his love and blessings are always with me and disconnected the call.
My dad passed away the next day due to a sudden cardiac failure while he still was in hospital attending his patients.
I couldn’t see him for the last time. I couldn’t seek his blessings. Since I was pregnant at that time, I was mildly sedated and kept away from the information until his last rites were performed.
My biggest regret: Not seeing my dad for the last time .
Image credits: Anonymous
#15
Divorce.
I was 18 when I got married. It was 1989, I was in love. We got married. He was 19. We welcomed our first daughter in 1990, second in 1991. We felt complete. Life was beautiful. My husband’s business was doing great. We could afford a luxurious life with many amenities by God’s grace.
4 years later we decided to have another baby. I was pregnant again. This time I wanted to have a boy. I used to pray for a boy. In 1996, my prayers were answered. I gave birth to a gorgeous baby boy. He had my eyes, he had my smile, and he had his father’s finger shape.
I was happy.
One year later, my husband decided to expand his business. He moved his business from the capital of the country to the economic capital of the country.
Initially he would come home every Friday and leave on Monday. This stopped after 2 months. His visits reduced. He didn’t have any affair, he was very loyal but he made his business his priority. We started fighting. Every time we spoke we only had arguments. This continued till 1999 February, when we decided to separate. I regret it.
He bought us a house near our daughters’ school. We decided that the daughters will stay with me and he took the custody of our 30 months old baby. I fought for my son’s custody but lost. We never remained in touch.
4 years ago, my husband got in touch with my daughters. They started spending time together. He would often meet them and call them.
One day my daughters requested him to let them meet their brother. He agreed. I was happy I was finally going to meet my son after 15 years. I didn’t know him at all. I didn’t know how he looked, what he liked, nothing at all.
When I met him, I realised how horrible I am as a mother. Because of my stupid decision it was my son who suffered the most.
He was put into a boarding school right away. My husband never met him in all these years. He was busy with his business. My baby was left there all alone. When other children went back to their homes during vacation, my baby had nowhere to go. He stayed there at the hostel. He had to eat horrible hostel food. He never came home for holidays. He doesn’t know what a family is. He doesn’t know what love is. For 15 years he was left all alone like an orphan, but, my husband sent him money regularly. He was an orphan with money.
I never got married after the divorce. I spent my life taking care of my daughters. I wish I can go back in time. I could’ve stayed there with my husband and took care of my baby. My precious little baby lost his childhood because of me. He deserves a better mother. It wasn’t his fault.
Image credits: Anonymous
#16
4V6I met with a car accident on 22nd July 2015. At that time I was pursuing my first-year MBA. It was my friend’s birthday. He asked me to buy some food for everyone. I had my own car at that time so I went to buy the food along with two of my friends. It was around 11:30 pm. We searched for open restaurants everywhere but we were not able to find any, so we decided to go back. I was speeding my car at 120 Km/hr and there was a truck waiting to make a U-turn. I didn’t slow down the car. I thought I can cross the truck before it takes U-turn but instead I hit the truck. After that, I don’t remember anything. Next time I opened my eyes, I was inside an Operation Theatre. Both my legs were broken and I unwent two surgeries to fix my legs. As for what happened to my two friends who were with me, the one who sat beside me in the front seat had a fractured hip and the one in the rear seat had minor injuries. After the surgery on both of my legs, I got another shocking news that the toes on both my feet were severely damaged and crushed so they would have to be amputated, so that the infection won’t spread to my legs. Then I went for another six surgeries to amputate my toes.
It was the hardest time in my life, I was not even able to walk. I was just lying in the hospital bed for almost 6 months while my friends were promoted and going to the second year of the course. I was extremely depressed and sad for the mistake I had committed that day. I was not able to forgive myself for that. Then I and my friend (with the hip injury) got special permission from the college and were allowed to write the exam without attending any classes for six months. Finally we completed the MBA degree with 70% marks. Afterwards, we also got placed in a company through campus selection but I didn’t join the job as my parents didn’t want me to stay in that city anymore. So I came to my native place and after one year, I got a job and worked for a very less salary, but my parents were happy as I was with them. Now I’m 27 years old, physically fit, and now I run and jump again. I still own a car which I drive by myself everyday to my office. No one can find about my absent toes unless I walked barefeet. I always wear socks and shoes to hide this from everyone as I don’t want them to feel sympathy on me.
This was the biggest mistake in my life I should have avoided driving at late nights for unimportant things and also should have driven relatively slowly and more carefully. Because of that unfortunate incident, I feel my life’s growth slowed down.
My two friends who were involved in that car accident are well settled and happily married now.
I just wanted to share this with everyone so that they can understand that life is unpredictable and we should always fight back if things don’t go in our favour. Life is short, and we should enjoy every moment of it.
Image credits: Nawaz Khadar
#17
Falling in love all over again to a man I dated and trusted in high school after 25 years. I gave up a wonderful relationship, a beautiful home at the beach, a great job that I had for 21 years and moved to the southern desert to be and marry him. We were married for 20 years and I found out he was living 2 separate lives with another woman and for the last 5 years had been hiding thousands of dollars with his greedy, adult daughter to keep for themselves. Now fighting and going through a divorce and discovering just how evil a person can be. I never stopped loving him and still struggle with not hating him. Wake up every day wondering why without an answer from him. He is still lying about everything and it kills my heart that all those years were wasted and what little regard he had for me. Throughout our marriage, he was always kind to me and when I found out he turned on me and is full of hate. I will never understand the horrible betrayal from a man I adored and would have done anything for.
#18
I am 22, recently graduated Mechanical Engineer and UNEMPLOYED.
It’s 23:15, I am sitting on my rooftop, lost in the thoughts of getting rejected from an interview today. Well talking about regrets, there is only one:
‘I lack communication skills.’
And this is how it goes:
I completed my schooling from a government Hindi medium school. I got 100/100 in maths but 63/100 in English. But I topped my school so didn’t care about one subject.
I took admission in a government engineering college of Uttarakhand where I completely devoted myself in studies to get good marks and a job. Didn’t join any college society and never participated in any activities.
In final year, companies came for recruitment and here comes the CLIMAX:
M/S Escorts: GD out
Hero moto corp: written clear, GD out
Bajaj motors: written clear, Interview out
Applied off campus: 4 GDs out, 3 Interviews out.
See, I had points in my mind to speak in GD and interviews, even some very good points. But at that moment I was unable to plot them verbally. I wasn’t quick enough to think and speak at the same time because I never did it before.
And every time whole conversation converges to, “mmmm…. you know” “mmmm…. you know”.
So a little piece of advice to all newcomers who are going to build their careers in any field:
‘If you can’t explain it to someone, you don’t know it.’
So just learn how to present your thoughts the way you think them and try to be social.
Good luck.
P.S. I watch English TV series( Breaking Bad, GOT etc.) and English movies too, very often. But listening, thinking and speaking are all different.
Image credits: Sanjay Bhatt
#19
I dropped out of computer engineering as a major at George Washington.
This was around 2003, I ended up majoring in business which has worked out fine overall.
But at my core, I think I’m an engineer. I like being creative and have always been very analytical. My dad was an engineering major at the Naval Academy, so maybe it runs in me.
Also, tech has exploded…
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Image credits: Sean Kernan
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