Some opinions can really make one’s blood run cold. And they don’t have to be some horror-story-based ideas; at times saying something sexist enough or simply completely out of line can make people wary.

Women of Reddit have discussed what they find worrisome after the user ‘neonroli47’ started a thread about it. The redditor asked them what’s an opinion they’ve heard someone express that made them scared of that person, and quite a few women shared their experiences. Continue scrolling if you want to see their answers and feel free to share yours in the comments section below.

#1

A seemingly sweet and sensitive guy I was seeing suddenly became really glazed over in telling me how much he was angry at women and how they’re to blame to relationships failing. His face went red and his eyes were welling up. It went over him like a wave then he returned to being all sweet and nice. I never really trusted him after that.

Image credits: magical_bunny

#2

I went on a date with a guy and he was telling me that he loved going to sports bars like hooters and twin peaks. He was telling me that his favorite time to go was lingerie nights. Then he was telling me he enjoys going to the bars on Saturday nights so he can watch women in tiny skirts and shirts and dresses cat fight. He then said “they’re drunk enough to act like that in public, imagine what they’d do in private” then winked at me. The next day he called me and asked me out again, after out first date I felt so uncomfortable and grossed out, I blocked him.

Image credits: justanotherperson218

#3

“I won’t let you get fat.”

“Yeah maybe after kids, for a little while, but not forever.”

Image credits: SippinRealitea

#4

‘old people should be euthanised when over 75’ – some dude in my philosophy class. Not a weird joke, not playing devils advocate, his genuine opinion that he then continued to defend with passion. He also believes the world would be better if we were all brainwashed into believing the same thing and having the same goal. While I am not physically afraid of him, i am very afraid he is going to become a cult leader or other serious criminal in the future…like genuinely….bro is not ok

Image credits: rosefaer

#5

I had a ridiculous debate with a man who believed fat people should not be allowed to own clothes… That’s a scary level of fat phobia

Image credits: EBSD

#6

“A woman can say no and later say yes so when she says no, it’s a challenge to change her mind.”

I literally don’t care what context this is in. Anyone who has this mindset when it comes to women is scary and I don’t want to be in their vicinity.

Image credits: shockedpikachu123

#7

“Listen, I know you don’t want to believe it but basically men are biologically designed to hunt and that includes hunt women. It’s in our nature to SA and just take what we want”. He said that on our second date.

Image credits: SleepFlower80

#8

Terrifying. I literally had someone I used to work with back in college ask me if I would go out with him. I wasn’t interested in him romantically, so I said no – and then he said, and I quote, “I’ll make you change your mind. You’ll say yes. Also, I wouldn’t trust any food I give you in the future.” (Which was weird, since I don’t accept food from people and he’d never offered me anything up to that point but I digress). The outright suggestion that he’d drug me and/or coerce me was enough to get me the hell away from him. It also helped that some male friends of mine called him on it. Ughhh. Another similar scenario, I had no car in college so I asked a friend (I thought we were friends, anyway, up to this point) to drive me to the dentist for a dental emergency. Went fine. Afterward, he asked if I’d be his girlfriend. I said no because again, not interested. He then asked me if I’d just be his “facebook status” girlfriend (weird?????) and I said no again. THEN he drove me down a quiet backroad and parked and said he could “r**e me and no one would know”. I thank god every day I got out of that situation without any harm or any assault. People who can’t take no for an answer are immediately out of my life. No questions asked.

Image credits: Momoreau

#9

A few months ago on the news a man fought with his gf and pushed her off a cliff. My uncle said something along the lines of “she probably did something to trigger him”

Image credits: Choc_Muffin

#10

“If a woman ever hits me, I’ll knock her out.”

Without a need for self defense, I agree that women shouldn’t just feel free to hit men, or anyone, but this sort of statement is just overkill. There was also nothing to prompt him to say this. He just wanted to act tough.

Image credits: DeadNeedle

#11

“If it was that bad you would have said something at the time” and when I said I had said the day before I didn’t want to have sex like that “just because you said you didn’t want to have sex like that the day before, doesn’t mean you didn’t want to the next day”.

Said by my partner when I brought up to him that I felt like he had violated my consent during sex.

Image credits: Boring-Pirate

#12

One guy (on the first date) stated that age of consent laws were b*llshit because “those 15-year old girls want it”. I told him he was disgusting and he laughed at me. I walked out and didn’t look back.

Image credits: RoseBobtail

#13

Telling me in great detail on the ways they want to physically hurt someone

Image credits: Puzzleheaded_Fig6314

#14

I was talking to my now ex friends with benefits about Roe v. Wade and how if I were to get pregnant I would want an a******n. And he sat there in silence and told me after a minute or two that he would want me to keep the baby, I looked at him like he was crazy because we were just friends with benefits and he refused to commit to me so why would I ever have his baby when he won’t even be with me? I asked him why he would want me to keep it considering our circumstances and he said “ just because we’re two adults who are not ready for a relationship( he wasn’t ready I was very ready ) doesn’t mean that we would make bad parents” like wtf that’s exactly what it means??? It’s crazy how many men in this world are just OK with a girl having their baby even if they won’t commit to them. We are no longer speaking

Image credits: rosiegirl8903

#15

An older family member told me through a smile and matter-of-fact voice that “education should be segregated, that’s just the way it works best.”

Image credits: Responsible-Lie-4755

#16

I was working at a retail store for a major phone carrier. As I was helping this guy he paused our conversation and told me that if he knew that he wouldn’t go to jail or prison for it, he would r**e me right then and there. Immediately left the situation and got my manager involved. When my manager told him to leave, the customer acted truly shocked and didn’t know why I would have taken offense to that. His argument was “I was just making a point, I didn’t do anything. What ever happened to free speech?”

Image credits: DeferentDesperado

#17

That women deserve to get harassed for what they wear. He had the audacity to debate about this on facebook.

Image credits: peachyjung

#18

That people who choose to be child-free are selfish.

Image credits: emojicatcher997

#19

Anytime a man says that he wishes things would go back to the way they were in the 50’s. It’s been said to me so casually by co-workers. It’s an instant nope from me. Automatically tells me that I should be cautious because they don’t see me as an equal.

Image credits: VitaminS010

#20

Coworker on facebook posted a photo of the gun his wife gave him for Christmas with the comment “I can’t wait to use this to protect my family.”

Not “I can’t wait to go hunting/get in some target practice.”

Not “I hope it’s never necessary but I’m glad I have it to protect my family.”

That is a dude who legit hopes he gets to shoot someone.

Image credits: okokimup

#21

I was in a class about sexual harassment. The teacher told us a story about a baron and his wife. The baron was supposed to go on a trip and told his wife not to leave, and that if she did, something terrible would happen to her. The wife leaves to go see her lover. When she tries to get back into the castle, the gatekeeper won’t let her because he was ordered to k**l her if she left. She tries to get help from friends but no one will help her, so the gatekeeper k***s her. At the end the teacher asked us who was responsible. The majority of men in the room said it was her fault because she cheated and disobeyed her husband. This was before I was supposed to deploy with these men in the Army. It made me terrified to be stuck with them for the better part of a year. If anything happened to me, they would either be the perpetrators or they would blame me, because apparently infidelity is worse than m****r and women who cheat should be k****d. 

Image credits: felltheblackwolf

#22

“Nice guys finish last.” IMMEDIATELY NO

Image credits: navrupan

#23

I was dating someone who said he can’t take women in his workplace seriously when they give him instructions unless they are bigger than him (taller, heavier, etc). He would also often tell me he saw dreams of him k*****g women. He thought of himself being so progressive.. We didn’t date for long after that for obvious reasons.

Image credits: witch_hekate92

#24

“Hey, you’re Indian and I’m Pakistani. You know we’re enemies, right?” This was from an Uber driver I had years ago at 11 o’clock at night.

I also went on a date with a guy who said, “I like to look into people’s houses. I wish there wasn’t a law in trespassing.” I blocked his number since lol.

Image credits: diveintomysoul

#25

A colleague once told me that women weren’t meant for the workforce. I usually speak up when I don’t agree with something so I asked why and he said “Women were designed to stay home and breastfeed while men don’t have anything blocking them to go to work”

Image credits: rfactor1997

#26

How he did not allow his better educated wife to spend her own salary without his permission. Her salary was higher than his and he was dumb as f**k. He did this because he genuinly believes women cannot make *any* decision. He also decides his wives bedtime.

Image credits: Apotak

#27

“I feel sorry for them but honestly if they’re walking alone and in quiet places at night what do they expect to happen?” My ex regarding women who get r***d. He got dumped the next day.

Image credits: AnyoneButMee

#28

i remember when i was in uni and was talking about how the plot line in twilight where edward follows bella home and watches her sleep was essentially stalking, and utterly terrifying.

my friend at the time, eyes popping out, bewildered at my opinion, said “are you kidding? i’d *love* that! don’t you find that totally romantic? (friend’s then girlfriend’s name) would really love that.”

that moment should have been a foreboding sign of what kind of person he was, but i thought he was being facetious at the time, as much as i was creeped out. he turned out to be one of the worst people i’ve ever met, and i’ve met someone who has drove drunk with a classically autistic woman in the back of their car!

Image credits: ianhartless

#29

That my uterus counts more than me.

#30

That some people deserve to be beaten

This was the excuse my abuser used to justify domestic violence. “Well maybe if she wasn’t disrespectful, that wouldn’t have happened” is what he told my Mom

It’s always a red flag when ppl have that opinion

#31

It’s always the kid’s fault when the parent loses their s**t on them. You know, casually justifying child abuse. The idea also applies to women.

#32

I went on a date with a guy who said to me, unprompted, that he thinks women should all experience terrible pain during sex, so that women would be less promiscuous. He was about 3 long island iced teas down and had been asking me to come back to his place prior to this, which I kept dodging.

I excused myself to the bathroom shortly after and bailed when he wouldn’t notice. Hilarious side note, this happened on the same night that I first met my current partner.

#33

I was shopping at Costco (big box store) and had to pause my purchase while I transferred more funds to my bank account (they only take debit or cash).

This guy I didn’t know, probably a little older than me, offered to pay for my entire purchase of about $200+. I don’t know why, but I got really uncomfortable and nervous.

I had the money so I declined. But it was weird. A really generous, seemingly Good Samaritan, offer just freaked me out instead.

#34

Second date. Going through a really shady underground tunnel at midnight. Him: “Ooh! You know what movie this reminds me of?” Yes. Yes every woman knows what movie this reminds you of. You’re not supposed to voice it out loud to a woman you barely know when she’s alone with you you goblin.

#35

Some dude: “Women in america make such a big deal about r**e” Different dude: “You are very r**e-able” I know it’s not all men, but sheeesh it’s too many. The thing is, these aren’t some f****d up individuals with nothing going for them. They’re well-established, went to college, eloquent, groomed. The first guy has to be in his 30s. It’s just a lot to deal with that type of s**t.

#36

A guy I asked what he loves about horror movies, he said the look in their eye the moment they know they can’t escape and they will die! Should have stayed clear but i tried to make it make sense. This person proceeded to do weird and wrong stuff from cheating to stealing to scamming and gets angry when questioned and refuses to speak when he knows the one questioning him knows the facts. He also did this with cops a few times. The thing is his face always looks happy and he has a calm friendly voice so people fall for it when they dont know the facts. He also talks allot about staying positive , vibes, and no stress ect ect. Took me a while to realize he doenst want to change and thus never will.

#37

I don’t let any man scare or intimidate me, but one time my father-in-law said he would r**e every pretty woman he came across if he could get away with it. Then looked right at me. By the way, he is HIV positive, so it was extra disturbing. Said this to me in front of my hubby, teenage son and my son’s friend.

#38

I was once taking an Uber home after work, it was my first time staying alone without my boyfriend and I was around 22.

the Uber driver wanted to know where I was from, aka my enthnicity. once I told him I was Indian, he replied with ” yes, I always wanted to marry an Indian girl as they are so much loyal and submissive and less likely to cheat on you” then he proceed to ask me if I lived alone and I told him I live with my husband and son and I have been married for years.

I slept that night with a hammer under my pillow.

#39

Office seat mate was known as a really sweet, pretty fun person but on the quieter side. They’d been working on something quite stressful. We’d all been giving them space.

Then out of the blue, after hours of quiet, in a casual tone …

“You know when people go into offices with a gun and just go postal? I get why they do that”

Then she walked off.

Image credits: PersonalityLost5228

#40

That SA is understandable in a war, and that they would probably do it too

#41

That if there were no repercussions whatsoever, he would love to hunt a person. This was a guy I was in a super committed relationship with at the time – luckily I came to my senses soon after and left him and his self-absorbed toxicity behind within a month of him telling me that.

#42

If a girl gets r***d and it lasts more than 10 minutes, it’s not r**e because “why not just fight them off?? she’s definitely enjoying it”. have never spoken to them since. still sick to my stomach.

#43

My co worker in all seriousness told me how he warned his wife and her mother that if she ever cheats he will cut off her head with an ax and bring the head to her mothers porch.

#44

Went out on a date with this man I met on a dating app, handsome man, maybe a little shy. We went out for dinner and a walk, everything was running smoothly, and the topic of therapy came out and he very nonchalantly told me that he told his female therapist that some women were in active search of f*****e. I noped out of there really quick.

#45

when i was younger my close friend told me he genuinely believed he couldn’t die. i thought he was kidding at first but he’d bring it up time and time again as we grew up. he’d say “you could shoot me in the head and i dont think i would die” always kept my eye on him since then

#46

“A man can’t be expected to ignore a 16 year old girl when she’s in his lap” – a male relative when I was expressing absolute disgust at men who prey on teens. His response? “If she knows what’s she’s doing, it’s her fault and he shouldn’t get in trouble for it.” 

Image credits: mmkaytheniguess

#47

When my ex shared he had cheated to more than one of his ex-s and then claimed he’s a committing person and wouldn’t step outside. Guess what happened later…

#48

A male friend of mine explained that he only realizes he loves his girlfriends after he’s cheated on them. Pretty messed up if you ask me.

#49

I’ve heard men defending convicted sexual predators…apparently they’re all the victims of greedy women. Those guys I avoid like the plague.

#50

My ex roommate/friend when he said that he’s sick of going into town and seeing beautiful women with “troglodyte” men who treat them like s**t. I asked him if he’d actually seen this and he didn’t answer, just went off on one about how he should treat women like s**t because they clearly love being abused.

Or the time when he had a female friend who was having trouble with her boyfriend and she herself was very unhappy, had anxiety and was being treated poorly by her partner. My “friend” outright told me that he was going to tell this woman not to complain about her boyfriend to him anymore because he doesn’t care unless she’s going to suck his d**k.

#51

I was in the car with a very close family member. They always like to play these inflammatory radio shows at a high volume when they drive. The hosts of the radio show they were playing that day were mocking the anonymous woman who accused Aziz Ansari of assaulting her. That family member then turned to me and said women in Hollywood were hypocrites for supporting the Me Too movement because they wore revealing clothing to red carpet events. I hate to say it, but it was probably something so small and insignificant for them that they have probably already moved on and forgotten about ever saying it. But I have never been able to forget that. Maybe I’m not afraid of them, but I can’t say that I respect them.

#52

“If there is no religion then what’s stopping people from just r****g and m*******g others?” If someone holds that opinion I just hope they never leave their religion and I stay as far away from them as possible.

#53

Went out with a guy who was convinced that hurting animals (not talking about veganism) is completely understandable

#54

Not scared but I was explaining to my co-worker the row vs wade trial and how it would affect a******n laws across the US and his response was “Wait, isn’t that a good thing?” 0 respect for this individual after that.

#55

Interracial marriages should be banned because people involved in them bring shame to the society. A former friend of mine said this to me (a missed race boy) it felt like he questioned my very existence.

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