Partners disagree about lots of things, and pets can be one of them. In fact, according to a survey by pet supply retailer Hepper, 15% of Americans have had serious disagreements about their pets with their partners. What’s more, 13% admitted that their pet had influence over the breakup with their partner.
For this woman, her pet also became the reason why she started considering separation from her boyfriend. After she accidentally found out he tried to put her dog down without her knowledge, she had to reconsider their entire relationship. But what he said in his defense certainly wasn’t on her bingo card.
A boyfriend planned to put down his girlfriend’s healthy dog without her knowing about it
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But she did find out and started questioning their whole relationship
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The woman tried to make sense of things while waiting for her workmate to come stay the night
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Commenters denounced the BF and couldn’t wait for the update after he comes back home
The woman planned to kick her BF out for his shenanigans
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During their confrontation, the BF said something that raised some serious red flags
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Image credits: explodeybrain
Image credits: GSR-PhotoStudio / Envato (not the actual photo)
Pet mistreatment can be directly correlated with intimate partner violence
At first, this story might seem like a simple “Oh, he just didn’t like dogs” situation. But after the update, it’s possible that the woman escaped a relationship that possibly could’ve gotten violent in the future.
At least that’s what research indicates. According to a 2008 Irish study, there is a correlation between domestic violence and violence against pets. 57% of the women respondents who escaped a violent partner admitted that they witnessed one or more forms of mistreatment against pets by their violent partners.
The most common types of violence against pets would involve kicking, swinging them by their tails/legs, throwing them around, causing blows to their bodies, and even taking their lives. When asked why they think their partners would do that, the majority would answer that it was because of either anger (36%), control (36%), or revenge (24%). Some women didn’t dare to leave a violent home in fears of their partner hurting their pet.
Authors of a 2021 study back up these speculations and note that the “underlying drivers towards violence” against pets and partners are “power, retaliation or a desire to upset.”
Trying to put down a partner’s dog is a common manipulative tactic used by emotionally exploitative partners. “By eliminating your pet, the narcissist has removed one more barrier in order to control you,” licensed counselor Stephanie Moulton Sarkis, Ph.D., writes for her blog on Psychology Today.
For violent and manipulative partners, this can be yet another way of exerting power. “Animals are controlled, they’re [exploited], violent things happen to them because the perpetrator has to be in control all the time,” Samantha Billingham with UK’s Survivors of Domestic [Violence] centre, explained to The Guardian.
Trying to put down someone else’s dog without their consent is often unlawful, too
As some commenters also noted, the boyfriend’s shenanigans can land him in seriously troubling legal waters. Depending on location and its laws, the consequences can differ, but it’s generally illegal to put down a dog without their owner’s consent. Some exceptions may include:
- The dog is severely injured or ill;
- Animal Control picked it up on the streets;
- The dog is aggressive and dangerous to people;
- The owner is neglecting and mistreating the dog to the point that the vet needs to alleviate its suffering.
In the U.S., it’s possible to sue a person for euthanizing your dog without your consent. According to the Northshore Animal League America, there have been cases where people got monetary compensations for the pet or even punitive damages “for egregious misconduct.”
The courts have admitted that such situations cause the pet owner emotional distress, loss of companionship, and the emotional value of the animal to the animal’s owner.
The best ways to ensure your dog doesn’t get into Sticksy’s situation is to microchip them, familiarize yourself with local laws (some neighborhoods might prohibit ‘dangerous’ breeds), and avoid losing them and letting them run away so that Animal Control is able to pick them up.
“It’s such a vicious, sociopathic thing to do,” people couldn’t believe the BF’s behavior
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