“[Am I The Jerk] If I Break Up With My Boyfriend For Ruining My Attorney Swearing In Moment?”

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There are many important milestones in life for which we want our loved ones to be present. Birthdays, weddings, promotion events, or graduations are a few of the big ones that come to mind. Having someone to support us during such momentous occasions can make all the difference. 

Unfortunately for the woman in this story, her boyfriend of over a year ruined her milestone swearing-in ceremony, instead of being there for her. His carelessness and disinterest really ruined her entire experience. 

More info: Reddit

When loved ones downplay your achievements or aren’t there for you during major events, it can feel extremely hurtful

Young woman with headscarf lying in bed, checking her phone during a boyfriend attorney swearing moment.

Image credits: Ivan Samkov / Pexels (not the actual photo)

The poster shared that she missed out on taking the bar exam when she wanted to, and then had to take it several times later as she was dealing with cancer

Woman recently sworn in as attorney looks upset reflecting on boyfriend swearing moment that spoiled the event.

Text on a white background reading the diagnoses threw me for a loop and ruined what I pictured my life after law school would be.

Text excerpt describing a boyfriend attorney swearing moment during bar exam and medical treatment challenges.

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Even attending her swearing-in ceremony became difficult due to her mom and dad’s difficult health situations, which is why she wanted her boyfriend to be present

Text excerpt discussing retaking the bar exam and completing cancer treatments, reflecting on a boyfriend-attorney swearing moment.

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Boyfriend attorney waiting patiently on a call during a ceremony while the judge begins swearing people in.

Text excerpt describing the boyfriend attorney swearing moment interrupted by a lost call during the oath-taking.

Man in a suit talking on phone while exiting car, capturing a boyfriend attorney swearing moment during a call.

Image credits: Ketut Subiyanto / Pexels (not the actual photo)

The poster’s boyfriend planned to FaceTime her during her event, as he couldn’t be there physically, but while on the call, he ended up going to the store

Text describing interrupted oath moment with boyfriend-attorney swearing in, showing distractions during legal proceedings.

Text description showing an upset boyfriend attorney swearing multiple times during an important moment on the oath.

Text post showing someone frustrated about their boyfriend repeatedly calling despite Do Not Disturb, relating to a boyfriend-attorney-swearing moment.

Woman taking notes during a virtual meeting with attorneys on laptop, focused on the boyfriend attorney swearing moment.

Image credits: Anna Shvets / Pexels (not the actual photo)

The FaceTime call got disconnected because the guy went to a store, so he called the poster back six times, which distracted her a lot during the eventText excerpt about a boyfriend attorney swearing moment and its impact on their breakup.

Text expressing frustration over family priorities, reflecting a boyfriend-attorney swearing moment about relationship conflicts.

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Text excerpt showing support during medical treatment and bar prep, reflecting a boyfriend attorney swearing moment context.

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Person swearing an oath during a serious moment, focusing on the boyfriend-attorney swearing moment without distractions.

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In an update, the poster mentioned that she decided to break up with her boyfriend partly due to the incident

The poster shared that she tried to take the bar exam in 2023, but got diagnosed with cancer a month before she had to take it. Even after postponing it, she wasn’t able to clear her other attempts as she was undergoing radiation treatment and dealing with the aftermath of all of that, which was obviously taxing.

Some people go through extremely difficult life situations, but still manage to move forward no matter what. This is because of something called resilience, which is a person’s ability to cope with loss, change, or adversity. Whenever someone goes through turbulent life events, if they can adapt, they’ll be able to keep growing.

The OP is clearly a strong and level-headed person because, apart from her cancer treatment, she has also had to cope with both of her parents getting immensely sick. Despite all of that, she wanted to attend her attorney swearing-in ceremony and bask in the fact that she had achieved so much.

The poster also wanted her boyfriend to be with her during the event as a source of support. A loved one’s presence is often extremely important during such milestones because it shows how much they care. It also shows that they want to celebrate you and care enough to make an effort to be by your side.

Young couple sitting on a bench outdoors, boyfriend comforting girlfriend during an emotional swearing moment.

Image credits: mladenmitrinovic / Freepik (not the actual photo)

The problem is that the OP’s boyfriend couldn’t be with her physically during her swearing-in ceremony. He said that he would FaceTime her and watch her give her oath. Unfortunately, right at the main part of the event, he went to buy bagels at a store, and his call got disconnected. He then tried calling the poster six times, which completely disturbed her and the other people on the call.

Even though the man offered to be on call with her during her ceremony, he didn’t show up for her in the way she wanted him to. A partner should show appreciation and support for their loved one in a way that actually makes them feel better. Doing the bare minimum might work a few times, but eventually it can lead to resentment in the relationship.

The woman did feel annoyed with her boyfriend because of how he kept calling her during such an important moment. In an update post, she also mentioned that he refused to go with her to visit her dad in the hospital as he wanted to be at a cookout. All of this showed her that he wasn’t right for her, and she decided to break up with him. 

It might feel extreme to end a relationship over a loved one missing an important event or not showing up for you the way you want. The thing is that it’s probably many similar situations that have led to those feelings of dissatisfaction, which is exactly what the OP felt about her long-term boyfriend.

Do you think she made the right decision by breaking up with him? What would you have done? Let us know in the comments below.

Most people sided with the poster and said that her boyfriend’s actions showed a clear lack of interest and support

Red-haired boyfriend attorney in a tense swearing moment, expressing strong emotion in a courtroom setting.

Commenters discuss a boyfriend’s disrespectful behavior during an attorney swearing moment, causing emotional pain.

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Comment expressing frustration over boyfriend attorney swearing moment at important ceremony supporting his girlfriend.

Commenter explaining the boyfriend’s attorney swearing moment shows disrespect and self-absorption during a key event.

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