#1

Getting upset with my father and slamming the door. This was the last moment I ever saw him alive before he passed away that night from a heart condition he had.

Edit: Thank you for all the kind words, this is really a learning factor for me.

Image credits: darkaztec01

#2

Lighting up that first cigarette.

But there is a happy ending, I haven’t had one in 5 weeks!

Image credits: Lt_Col_Anguss

#3

I really, really regret being a stay at home mom. I have a master’s degree in food chemistry but after having kids decided to stay at home. My husband’s career escalated and he got offered positions overseas. In the last twenty years, we have lived in many countries and I have traveled world wide. My kids can speak a handful of languages and are in university now. Despite all these seemingly great things, I haven’t ever done anything personally for myself and I really regret it. In my late forties, I feel like life has passed me by and I really, really regret not keeping a career.

Image credits: anon

#4

Law School. I’ll be paying back the loans for 20+ years. I don’t even want to be a lawyer anymore but I can’t afford not to be.

Image credits: catismycopilot

#5

Quitting college to take a management promotion at my fast food job.

Image credits: anon

#6

Trying h****n.

Currently on another attempt at sobriety though. 40 days clean currently. If anyone in your life struggles with a*******n, I can’t recommend a 12 step program enough.

Edit: I’m getting a lot of messages suggesting that I just smoke weed or take kratom instead. As an a****t, that just isn’t possible for me. Any mind or mood altering substance will just lead me back to dope. That’s just the program I work, and the program that’s successfully helped many others maintain long term sobriety.

Image credits: 61floor

#7

Drinking/allowing my alcoholism get as out of hand as it did. 263 days sober, though! So thats something.

Image credits: anon

#8

I’ll tell you a story about my nan. When conscription began in WWII, her husband was called up. He was getting ready to go to the train station, uniform and kit on, but she refused to say goodbye because she was angry with him and the situation. So he left. A few minutes later she realised her mistake and ran to the station after him. You can imagine how busy it was there, but she fought through the crowd. He was already on the train, looking out of the window for her. She saw him, but he never saw her.

That was the last time she saw him, he was tortured to death by the Japanese some time later. Even though she married again, to the man who became my grandfather, she kept a picture of him on her bedside table until she died.

EDIT: So in answer to your questions, I think they did manage to exchange at least one letter before he was captured, so I’m sure my nan apologised for putting him through that. I think he died working on the Burma Railway. They sent her a picture of his grave which she kept in her jewellery box. My grandpa was in a reserved occupation so was not called up, he had to work with bombed houses making them safe. He had to recover a lot of mangled bodies, including a lot of children which must have been horrible considering he was still a teenager. He was a great man, I wish I had an ounce of his moral fibre. Taught me to code on my C64 too.

Image credits: Messianiclegacy

#9

Getting fat. Easily.

Image credits: JetBrink

#10

Not breaking off my last relationship sooner.

It was 2.5 years long. I was hit, scratched, guilt tripped. She made me believe my friends didn’t like me, she would message them from my phone pretending to be me, and I lost my friends.

She blamed everything on me, ever her parents’ divorce. She would self harm with scissors, attempted to o******e on paracetamol twice and blamed it on me. I would be at work and receive a text saying “I’m not feeling good, I’m going to cut myself or do something bad, you need to come and stop me”. I’d freak out because I couldn’t leave work, but didn’t want her death to be my fault.

She’d drag me into the street at 3am to have an argument so all her neighbours could “hear what a terrible person I was”.

I became depressed because I couldn’t understand why I was such a bad person. I had panic attacks daily, I began losing weight, and so I took myself to therapy.

I sat down with her one night and broke up with her because I genuinely believed she deserved someone better than me. A few weeks later, I had a revelation of what had been happening. I deleted her number, changed my number, threw out everything of hers and my life instantly became colourful again.

Before this relationship, I would think “I don’t get why people in a*****e relationships don’t just leave”, but now I get it. You don’t know you’re in an a*****e relationship until you’re out of it.

EDIT: Also, she was playing with my cat once and he accidentally bit her, so she kicked him. She f*****g kicked my cat against the stairs.

Image credits: atworkorpooping

#11

I’m pretty sure I’m making it right now by wasting my life away, but I can’t think of anything better to do, so here we are.

Image credits: DarthLeon2

#12

Not marrying the love of my life. I’m only 26 but I had been with her for the better part of 7 years. I purposed after the first year because I knew she was the only girl for me. I even asked her father for permission. I got cold feet and we didn’t get married.. one thing happened after another and now I find myself 3000 miles away from her and single. I miss her everyday. I should’ve married that girl

Image credits: stripperjnasty

#13

I’ll honestly never know if it was a mistake, but I flipped a coin to decide whether to go to college or leave home and hike the Appalachian Trail.

Heads I went to college and spent the next four (ended up being five) years working on a degree. Tails I grabbed my already-packed gear and went on an adventure.

It landed on heads.

College led to job which led to responsibilities. I still camp on the Trail, but my hopes of doing a through-hike are mostly behind me. I’m not as young and spry as I used to be and those responsibilities require a constant paycheck.

I recognize anything could have happened if it landed on tails. I could have wimped out half-way through or less, then gone right back home to do the college thing. I could have finished, been proud of myself and then gotten a job. I could have also had a life-changing adventure. Or I could have been eaten by a bear.

I’ll never know, but I do wonder.

Image credits: followthepull

#14

In all seriousness investing in bitcoin. I had a buddy who quit a 100k year job right out of college to go make equipment to mine bitcoin, This was around 2012. He told me so many times to invest and i just never pulled the trigger.

Image credits: Alldawaytoswiffty

#15

I didn’t speak up after what my grandfather did to me. I couldve protected my cousin from him but I was just a scared 12 year old.

*Edit: Thank you everyone for your kind words, It really means a lot to me.

Image credits: anon

#16

When I was in middle school I didn’t walk my dog. She’d get walks from my parents in the mornings, and on the weekends…but every afternoon I got home from school first and I was supposed to take her. She loved walks. She’d scratch at the door and I’d pet her and tell her I’d take her soon, but I was lazy and selfish and always ended up sitting on the couch watching TV. Mom would come home and I’d lie and say I’d walked her hours ago, like I was supposed to. I’d feel a little bad but the next day I’d forget and it’d be the same.

I got my act together by sophomore year. Then college came, and I missed her so much I spent as much time with her as I could when I was home. We walked to the park and the beach and we’d run and play.
After college, when she got sick and started to lose her vision, I moved home for the summer to give her special eye drops four times a day. Her infection got better but her sight got worse. I had to help her see where the porch steps were, and later lifted her down them when it was just too hard. I tied a bell to her collar and slept on the couch next to her bed so I could hear when she got up at night and take her outside.

And every day, I walked her. We walked together every morning, twice in the afternoon, and again before dinner if it wasn’t too dark. I guided her around cars and through lawns. Sometimes she’d sniff the grass, tail wagging, and sometimes she’d walk so close to me she’d bump her nose into my shin on purpose, making sure I was still right there. When we got home I’d scoop her up and lift her over the stairs, kissing the top of her head and telling her what a good girl she was. And I’d think about all the times I let her down and tell her I was sorry. That I wished she understood me. That I was so sorry, that she was my darling and I loved her, and if I could go back in time to make the choices I should have I’d do it in a heartbeat.

The last time we walked together was on Labor Day. I’d come home again for the weekend, mostly to see her. My parents called the next Saturday to tell me.

I miss her. And I still wish I could’ve loved her as perfectly as she loved me.

Image credits: kaywinnet16

#17

Cheating on my ex girlfriend for stupid reasons. Don’t know how some people can be repeat cheaters. F****d me up for a solid three years. DON’T CHEAT IT’S NEVER WORTH IT.

Image credits: lychan6

#18

Listening to my teachers, family, and peers when they said I was naturally terrible at math and should focus on the humanities in high school and college.

I’ve always been fascinated by biology and human behavior, and I devour books and articles about genetics, neuroscience, and computer science. But I have this phobia (or used to, I’m realizing that I’m not as clueless as I thought) of very basic math, and am terrible at simple equations.

I wish I had really gone for a fresh start in college, away from all the negativity and preconceived ideas about what I could or couldn’t do.

Image credits: stange_loops

#19

I had a friend reach out to me to hang out and buy some pot, back in 2015. I was pretty f****d up, so I ignored that text and figured I’d chill with him the next day.

He hung himself that night. I’m not self-centered enough to think that I could have been a deciding factor, but d**n, I think about it a lot. What if I had just said okay and gone over that night? Maybe he’d still be alive.

Image credits: 40ozAwayFromFreedom

#20

Dropping out of college, because I didn’t know what I wanted to do for the rest of my life.

Image credits: anon

#21

Throwaway because this is the biggest shame of my life.

When I was in high school, I was in a relationship with a guy that was a straight up sociopath. I was crazy co-dependent on him, because he was older and I was just excited that a guy was paying attention to me because I was young and insecure. He would emotionally abuse and physically r**e me on a regular basis, berate me in front of his friends, and sometimes share me with his friends.

We were at a house party one night, everyone was underage and everyone was drinking. I had gone to sleep in the spare bedroom in the basement. The basement also had a living room area and the walls were thin.

I heard my then-boyfriend and one of his friends and a girl that went to my highschool through the wall, and she was clearly too drunk and s****d to know what was going on. I listened to them r**e her, I listened to her crying, and I just laid there and was glad it wasn’t me. I didn’t try to stop it, I didn’t tell anyone, and I never offered her help or support later on.

She k**led herself later that year. I don’t know if I could have helped her if I intervened, but I think about it almost every day.

Edit: I kept dating him for almost a year afterwards.

Image credits: throwawaycowardx

#22

Going to Bible College.

Initially I was going to go to University for Aerospace Engineering, but I wound up going to this tiny private bible college that charged 4x more, credits that wouldn’t transfer, and an administration that kicks people out for having s*x because it’s unholy.

That was a lovely waste of $50,000 and 4 years of my life.

Edit: Since this is getting more attention than I anticipated, I will take this opportunity to tell people to stay away from these types of religious colleges *regardless of your faith or beliefs.*

Leaving is a hugely traumatic and sudden process. It took me several years and being involuntarily committed for a week after multiple s*****e attempts to begin getting past it.

These places are dangerous in the social pressures they exert and the enormous amount of control they wield in robbing you of your entire support structure in family and friends in order to coerce you to stay.

I am being completely serious when I say barely survived the process. One of my closest friends didn’t.

Image credits: PM_ME_YOUR_BURDENS

#23

Ignoring depression for a couple decades and convincing myself that it wasn’t chemical, but that my life just sucked.

Image credits: cjdudley

#24

Easy, not living in the freshman dorms. Missed out on a big part of early college experience with that one.

Image credits: Personage1

#25

Not properly managing my money. It’s easy to dig yourself a hole but man is it hard to climb out.

Image credits: jsneakss

#26

Getting annoyed when my mom would call me a lot. She died when I was 22. Now I am lucky to get a call here and there from my dad…There isn’t much that I wouldn’t do to get one more phone call from her.

Image credits: anon

#27

Not going out and dating and doing sports while in my 20s.

I was reading books instead. It was still awesome. But now I am a bit pudgy and socially awkward and alone.

I am still not going out and still not doing sports. I do date. Now and then. Reading is still awesome. I just need to eat less chocolate.

Image credits: HumanSieve

#28

Probably not getting a sleep study done back in jr high/high school.

Found out last fall at the age of 23 that I have narcolepsy – I’ll never get restful sleep in my life.

Really makes me reflect on my years in jr high when I remember being so freaking exhausted all the way until last year – after I paused my college education to focus on health.

TLDR: have narcolepsy. It’s equivalent to someone with healthy sleeping staying up for 48 hours straight and then starting their day.

Image credits: MHE17

#29

Getting Married. Don’t regret my kids, but I regret my wife.

Image credits: anon

#30

Serving a mission for the Mormon church.

Was two years long, and my personality/social skills are pretty bad making it a terrible two years where I didn’t help whatsoever. I did it right after high school, so every girl I liked was married with kids by the time I got back (and I mean every girl), and a lot of my friends were now two years ahead of me in college. Its an awkward gap in my employment record that I’ve had to explain in job interviews (had a job in high school). I didn’t even stay in the Mormon church as of a couple years afterwords. So now I have these frustrating memories of trying to help that church grow. Even when I do have a story from the mission that I want to share, I always disguise the setting. I can hardly stand scrolling through my Facebook news feed, since half my friends are either missionaries I knew or Mormons from back in the day. I never did go to college because I felt too old. Oh and I suffer from anxiety and depression. It was the worst two years, and it won’t go away.

Image credits: SamsquatchOR

#31

Not flying to see my grandfather on his deathbed.

It haunts me.

When I was told to call him they said that he couldn’t speak anymore and to just say what I wanted and that he could understand for now.

I pulled some words out of my a*s and told him that I loved him and that as long as live I will honor him and keep his memory alive. He made some sounds. I heard my grandmother tell him not to try and speak. He forced himself to speak to me using what energy he had to tell me he loved me and was proud of me. That he did that for me when he wasn’t supposed to made my heart break.

I will never forget how hard it was for him to say those words. The strangled tears in his throat as he tried with all his heart to say goodbye to me one last time.

I should have been there. I was too afraid. Too ashamed. I know that he would have wanted me there. I know that I was his favorite. I was the only one that followed in his footsteps even remotely. I feel like I failed him when he really needed me, after everything he did for me.

#32

Developing an eating disorder. I’m 19 and half of my life has been in hospitals, avoiding food, and hating my body. The other half is holding it all together, or trying to.

#33

Wasting considerable money on short term love relationships

#34

When I finished college I had banked a good amount of cash from working my internship and had a sweet job offer right out of school.

A friend suggested that I take a month off between jobs and travel. Instead I gave my future employer a start date a few days after graduation.

I should have taken the time off and had some fun.

#35

I don’t need to think hard about this one at all. My biggest mistake is thinking a lump in my breast was just “nothing” and would go away on its own. Took me months before I went to the doctor and by that time it was too late. The resulting mental breakdown destroyed the people closest to me and I just can’t forgive myself for it.

I’m still alive only by the grace of modern cancer treatment progression. I was supposed to be dead a few years ago, but I’m still kicking a*s, in remission, and starting to rebuild my life. It’s been a journey I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemies.

#36

Trying to join the military. I shipped off to boot camp completely unprepared and they chewed me alive for 12 weeks straight. I was held back in training twice, covered in bruises from the training, and pulled every muscle in both legs and my left shoulder. One recruit looked at my bruises and told me I looked like a battered child. I was in constant pain and they didn’t care. I became so sick I had mucus coming out of my eye and I practically drowned every night on my own phlegm. They didn’t care. They told me I was in pain because I wasn’t drinking enough water then they got mad that I had to pee all the time. I was punished when I did things wrong and punished when I did things right and after a while I developed anxiety. I was terrified of anyone who held rank higher than E-2 and started having panic attacks. Even then they didn’t care until I gave my squadmates a preemptive apology. I wasn’t s******l and I don’t think I would’ve hurt anyone, but I was losing my grip on reality and I was terrified that I would lose control.

#37

Wasting so much time on video games and other forms of media and entertainment.

#38

Chasing that girl throughout all highschool when I probably had loads of attention from others. My emotionnal maturity is still lacking but it’s getting better! Also my life has been pretty short so far so not too much room for big mistakes

#39

I bought a condo with a high interest ARM loan right before the market crashed and the Great Recession kicked in. That one decision will have negative financial repercussions for me and my family the rest of my life.

#40

Not making a better effort to make and keep friends. Through a mix of depression and social anxiety, I ended up cutting some really great friends out of my life. For some reason I had convinced myself they didn’t like me anymore and would only talk and hang out with me because they felt sorry for me. So I stopped sending them messages and declined invites to hang out making up stupid excuses. Eventually they all stopped trying. Looking back at it I realize I was being ridiculous and letting the anxiety win. Yet this has caused me to now be afraid of making friends… Even though I desperately want to make friends.

#41

Heading home after a nice motorcycle ride on a sunday evening. Decide on a whim to take a small 10 minute detour because it was one of the last days of the year with nice weather.

Crashed into the side of a van with 80 km/h that didn’t give me the right of way. Spent 12 days in intensive care, ended up with persistent health problems and a reconstructed shoulder which left me partially disabled and unable to do sports, lift anything serious, etc.

It was a nice ride though!

#42

Not texting my boyfriend later that Thursday after an argument. I was mad and didn’t want to speak to him. When I finally texted him on Saturday, he had already been dead for 24 hours.

I wish I had told him I loved him. Everyone says it’s not my fault, but I will never know if I had reached out earlier whether that might’ve been enough to stop him. I’m never ignoring someone I love because of a petty argument, ever again.

#43

Not noticing my own behavior. Thinking I’ve become a better person and the realization of my mistakes has changed my life.

#44

Everything so far. I’m so unhappy with who I am and where I am. And I feel as though it may be too late to turn it around.

#45

My biggest mistake was to not believing in myself. Other people see us for how we behave and if we don’t believe in ourselves why should other people?

#46

Not dropping certain courses because I felt like I could do well despite my marks. Really f***s your cgpa over.

#47

Waiting so long before seeking help for my mental health issues. I silently struggled for well over a decade before deciding that enough was enough.

#48

Majoring in mechanical engineering. Should have just done computer science in the first place.

#49

I went on a second date with a guy I didn’t like because my on again off again highschool boyfriend blew me off to hang out with another girl. I wanted to make him jealous.

Instead I ended up spending two years being beaten and r***d and I dropped out of college. I had hopes and dreams and I destroyed all of them when I fell for the guy’s “nice guy” act.

#50

Turning down an academic scholarship to a nice four-year school to go stay closer to my controlling, uber-religious then-girlfriend. So instead I went to a smaller school to which I hadn’t even applied near her religious school, having no scholarship at all. Relationship ended about a year later.

#51

Not getting to know the hot girl who allegedly had a crush on me

#52

Being committed to a long distance relationship. It’s been four months since we broke up and I’ve made little to no progress in trying to find some sort of peace within myself.

#53

Chasing my (now ex) boyfriend across the country instead of finishing my first year of college. Just up and left in the middle of a semester and never went back. I think about it every single day and I don’t think I’ll ever stop. 18 year old me was very naive and stupid.

#54

Not keeping a journal.

#55

Not being more money savvy in my 20’s. Am still paying off credit card debt in my 30’s. Don’t get me wrong, I had a great time when I was younger but I do regret it massively.

#56

Getting out of the military instead of sticking it out, I would be in a much better spot now if I had stayed in.

#57

Having kids. I’m not cut out to be a mom, which I knew from the get go. Birth control failed and here I am. I do my absolute best by them every single day. This parenting stuff is tough. I love them fiercely, but I miss having freedom and money and space. I feel like an a*****e for saying this.

#58

Not coming out sooner.

#59

Basing decisions about my life on what other people think.

Always make sure you are making decisions based on what YOU want in life, it may be hard but it is so worth it. not only can it save you time in terms of years wasted doing something you don’t like, but also money and most importantly, your **own emotional health and well being.** Constantly worrying about what other people think of you is not only distracting for you’re career and personal development, but it can be discouraging and damaging.

Know what you want in life, and make decisions to help yourself get you there.

Have a great day!

#60

Quitting a great job with huge advancements when I was 19 because a girl, the job took me out on the road for 2-3 weeks at a time and I didn’t want to leave her for that long at the beginning of our relationship. F**k that was dumb. It took me 8 years to make that much money again, and that girl dumped me after 5 months of dating.

#61

Accepting the position I work in now. Biggest mistake I have ever made, I am more miserable than I have ever been in my entire life. In fact, f**k 2019 as a whole, this years can kiss my a*s, I am done.

#62

In the mid 2000s I used to work a call centre job while finishing up uni. It was a startup fintech type job. People got promoted quickly and they paid above minimum wage. But I was naive and didn’t realize how backstabby some people could be to get ahead.

I carpooled with who I thought was a friend until he started secretly recording our conversations in the car to curry favor with my managers. Thinking I was safe I was honest about my feelings about certain things at work and sure enough he played the recordings to my bosses and soon after I noticed a change In how I was being treated.

They let me go with severance when I caught on to the fact that I was being asked to train my replacement.

This led to about 10 months of unemployment with employment insurance and me finding a much better paying job. It was a blow but I learned from it and I’m glad I’m not stuck in what is ultimately a dead end call centre job, no matter how they spin job titles.

#63

Eating my feelings when depressed during most of college without also exercising.

#64

When I was saving to go to college, I was a painter.

One day on the job this woman at a house said her son was looking for someone exactly like me. Non grad, hard worker, nice.

She told me he was the CEO of x company, for reference, his latest contract involved a complete overhaul of the London Olympic stadium ready for the 2012 Olympics. Needless to say he’s not a small fry.

This guy came out of his way to talk to me, when I say out of his way, he f*****g flew in from Germany. I didn’t know that at the time, I also didn’t know he was coming to see me. I just got told to go up to this office room and there he was behind this 12 foot mahogany desk.

Had a lovely chat with him and he offered to take me on. Take me on working directly under him, to be trained to take over in the coming years because he wanted to retire before 40 and he had no kids.

What the f**k did I say? “I’m sorry but x line of work has no interest to me, I really want to go down the animal care route”. He respected that.

But years later, living on my own, just getting by juggling my paid work and undergrad I realised what a f*****g mistake that was.

#65

When my ex told me, “I’m not good for you and I’m going to ruin your life”, I should have believed him.

#66

When I was fresh out of school with a useless degree in creative writing and no experience, in the middle of the recession, I interviewed to be a Marketing Coordinator for a local fishing resort/marina that was also headquarters for a few dozen vacation resorts along the west coast. Pay was great, job perks included free travel and food/accomodation at any of these resorts and a fairly freeform job in creating print and web ads, blog material, doing some market research and interviews. It sounded super fun. I aced the interviews and felt like a shoe-in based on how they were talking to me. I prepared for my life of luxury.

They asked me to just throw together a quick ad concept. I was staying at my girlfriend’s house when the request came in and she didn’t have Adobe CS, so I threw something together quickly in Paint, yes Paint, kind of assuming it didn’t really matter since it was just a concept. It was terrible. They went silent, I didn’t get the job, and I faced a difficult few years of racking up credit card debt, digging up freelance work, and mass-applying to jobs that never contacted me back.

I’m doing okay now, but I always wonder what things would be like if that had worked out.

#67

Telling how I felt to my best friend…she didn’t feel the same way and from there it went badly mainly because of how I handled the situation… Lost one of the most important people in my life that day.

#68

A friend of mines owned a small business. His wife wanted a job so he made her the bookkeeper. He went on a business trip and when he came back, gave her a whole bunch of receipts to record as expenses. There was one receipt from the business she could not decifer so she looked it up on the internet… it was a brothel.

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