Working with kids can be incredibly challenging but also very rewarding. But your job as a daycare worker doesn’t just come down to education, games, and naptime. Sometimes, you have to deal with bizarre issues that pop up out of nowhere.

In a very honest thread on AskReddit, daycare workers revealed the biggest family secrets that children have ever told them. They range from the lighthearted and witty to the serious and concerning. Though, not every secret spilled by kids turns out to be true. Scroll down to read these childcare employees’ tales from work.

#1

So I worked in a day nursery for about 4 or so years, and I will never forget the day they a 3 year old outted her mum and dad for having a swing in their bedroom by drawing a pretty graphic picture of the swing and her “mummy” laying back in it and daddy kneeling down in front of her. We reported it to management because of policies and procedures but my lord……I had to leave the room and laugh before I imploded.

The same child maybe 3 or 4 days later pipes up during a conversation about religion (it was around Christmas time so we were covering what religions have what festival/gods etc) she announces that her mummy loves god very much and prays to him a lot at night. Without even thinking we asked how does she pray…she responded with making moans and saying “oh my god, oh god oh god oh god, yes I am so close” and that she thought it was sweet she felt so close to god.

I miss this kid.

Image credits: MissFuzzums

#2

Bit late to the party, but I once had a boy tell me about how “mommy keeps kissing godfather in the mouth when daddy isn’t home”. I got really awkward when she came to pick him up.

Image credits: SSVNormandySR1

#3

When my son was 3 I bought my wife ‘Titanic’ on video – yes, it was a long time ago – for her birthday. He asked if he could watch it after nursery school. We said that it wasn’t really a film for children, it was a film for grown ups, like mummy and daddy. When I picked him up later his nursery teacher was stifling her laughter as he had been telling everyone all day that it was his mummy’s birthday that day and that daddy had bought mummy a special video that only mummies and daddies could watch….

Image credits: RicoDredd

As ChildCareEd points out, childcare workers have a big impact on kids’ formative years as they learn and grow. They give the little munchkins a safe, nurturing, engaging, stimulating environment for their physical, cognitive, and emotional development.

Not only that, but daycare staff also act as mentors and role models for kids, sharing some of their values.

One of the most fundamental skills for childcare employees to have is the ability to communicate well. It’s vital if you want to build a strong relationship based on trust with the kids you’re looking after, as well as their parents.

This means being an active listener, communicating clearly, and also understanding non-verbal cues. What’s more, you should be able to adapt how you communicate depending on who you’re speaking with.

#4

They tell me everything! If you lie to your daycare worker your child will spill the beans.

I have lots of 3 year olds struggling with potty training. Every single parent will tell me they’re working with the child at home. Your kid will tell me if that’s true or if you’re just putting them in diaper as soon as you get home.

Biggest thing I’ve been told. One little girl mentioned how her grandma tries to breastfeed her. Her grandma picked her up everyday from daycare and had her just about all afternoon with her, alone. We called parents and cps. An investigation was done and grandma admitted to holding her like she was nursing but claimed they were just cuddling.

From my conversation with the little one it sounded like it was definitely going on. She was really really detailed for an almost 3 year old. Grandma walked away unscathed and still picked little girl up from daycare regularly.

Image credits: anon

#5

Not a daycare worker but I’ve done a lot of babysitting.

When I was 15 I watched a 7 year old whose mother worked with mine. Mom was a secretary and the little girl’s mom was an APRN. I liked the kid, she was a smart girl, and I liked her mom.

Anyway one day the girl tells me that her mom’s name isn’t her real name. That she made it up “for work” and it was like having a new mommy. I had no idea what that meant so I tried to ask more questions but didn’t get very far as I don’t think the little girl really had any idea what was actually going on. She did tell me her mom’s “real” name though, so I asked my mom about it. She didn’t know either. She was curious so she asked a couple people at work.

Turns out the woman I was babysitting for had somehow faked EVERYTHING — her name, identification, degree, work history. She was not an APRN. She had no degree. Her real name was not the name she had given. It was crazy. Nobody has any idea how she did it, how she managed to fake her way through that job with no training. The office they worked at was a fairly large and well respected office in CT. She was obviously fired and I no longer had my babysitting job.

Image credits: Chupacabraonfire

#6

Teaching community helpers and showed the kids handcuffs. Little girl from a really strict muslim family says “mommy put those on Daddy last night and then Daddy took off his pants”.

Image credits: lcook116

“When working with children, clear and concise communication helps them understand instructions, express their needs and feelings, and develop their language skills. It also enables you to establish boundaries, set expectations, and resolve conflicts,” ChildCareEd explains.

What’s more, you should maintain open lines of communication with the parents, too. You ought to regularly update them about their kids’ progress and any challenges they might be facing. And you should also be open to their feedback. All of this requires a lot of patience and emotional intelligence.

Meanwhile, Indeed stresses the fact that childcare workers must be good at planning out educational activities, as well as instructing kids in different subjects.

What’s more, they should also strive to be creative thinkers, have good decision-making and analytical skills, and be able to solve problems as they arise.

#7

I worked a year at a day-care center. TECHNICALLY I was an unpaid volunteer, but I got paid under the table. Anyway. I had a kid explain that he had two daddies and two mommies. I’m… naturally confused. But he was explaining that sometimes he’d have one dad and his mom, then the other dad and his mom, then the other mom and his dad, then his ‘real’ mom and his real dad.

Came out later that it wasn’t the crazy love-rhrombus I was expecting, they were just swingers.

#8

I teach two year olds, and we were asking the kids what their parents’ names were, just to see if they knew. I asked a little boy, “What’s mommy’s name?” He says, “Michelle.” Then I asked “What’s daddy’s name?” And he looks confused, as if he’s trying to figure out the answer, but can’t. So I ask, “What does Mommy call Daddy?” Assuming he would say John, instead he looked up at me and says, “Big Papa.” I couldn’t help but bust out laughing.

Image credits: obsolete16

#9

With a group of 3 year olds we were coloring paper ties for Father’s Day and talking about what their dads liked to do. As the kids were calling out their dads’ hobbies, one little girl had an epiphany. She gasped and shouted in excitement, “I have a dad!”

She had recently been adopted by her foster parents.

But, of course, the core of the job revolves around empathy and compassion. “Many child care workers serve as sole caretakers throughout the day, mentors, guidance counselors and teachers all in one,” Indeed stresses.

“The ability to relate to and interact with the children and families that you work with will depend on your ability to find understanding in others’ ideas, thoughts, and feelings. Additionally, when children get hurt or have a bad day, you’ll need to rely on your patience and compassion to provide the best support and care you can to your students.”

#10

I once had CPS called on my parents because I told my daycare worker “there was nothing to eat and I was starving”. True story was my mom hadn’t had time to get groceries and asked my dad to go before I left for daycare saying something like “could you pick up the groceries, I don’t want her to starve for another day tomorrow”. I actually had breakfast that morning but not the usual and refused to eat it all.
I never saw my mom so embarrassed ever again.

Image credits: lulastark

#11

I had a 3 year old come to class with little red circles on his arms, legs, and back after spending the week with his dad. He told me that daddy burns him with his hot smelly sticks when he was mad…dad was burning the kid with cigarettes, definitely got CPS involved.

#12

2 year old girl to my mother, her nursery teacher: “My mother says you’re black.”
My mother: “Yes, I am.”
2YO: “My mother says she doesn’t like black people.”

My mother is (obviously) Black and a nursery teacher in a country where most other Black (African/American/Europeans) people are temporary residents only, so most locals have never really interacted directly with Black people.

Bonus: this little girl is (light brown-skinned) Arab and apparently was also told by her mother that she is white.

ETA: deets about little girl’s physical appearance.

Also I won’t go into a debate about the whole ‘Arabs classified as Caucasian or White on censuses in the US’ thing, but essentially my point was that regardless of if we believe that girl was white or not, her conversation with MY mother reflects that she absorbed what her mother told race. That’s her introduction to race relations, that her mother doesn’t like Black people. It was shady on her mother’s part at best and irresponsible and potentially damaging at worst.

Have you ever worked in a daycare before? What are the biggest secrets that kids have ever shared with you?

On the flip side, if you’re a parent, have your children ever spilled any (mildly embarrassing) secrets to their daycare workers? If you feel like sharing, you can do so in the comments below.

#13

The daycare people knew we were trying for baby number two because an ovulation test sticker got stuck on (soon to be) older brothers shoe.

Image credits: DONT_PM_ME_B

#14

My kindergarten class had parent volunteers come in sometimes to help with projects. My mom signed up and came one day, but the other mother who was supposed to also come in called out sick. At recess my mom saw the mother’s son and said something like “Hi [kid name] I heard your mommy was sick and I hope she feels better. Is she okay?” The boy said “Yeah, she’s okay but the balloon in her [chest] popped and she had to go to the doctor to get it fixed.” Basically, she called out because her breast implant leaked or had some issue. Not really shocking, just kind of funny.

Image credits: anon

#15

It was a two year old, but I knew that mommy was having a baby before daddy did.

It wasn’t daddy’s baby.

Image credits: anon

#16

When I was a preschool teacher, we got a new student who would describe her home life to us often. One time she told a story that basically translated to her mom clogging the toilet and her dad struggling to unclog it.

She would tell us so much about her home life, we even warned her mom be careful because she would repeat EVERYTHING she sees.

Image credits: SmootherThanAStorm

#17

I asked this question to my son’s preschool teacher one day. She said one day it was story time and all the kids were sitting in a circle on the reading rug. She was reading them a book about animals and the sounds each one makes. An owl comes up and none of them know it, so she says “It’s an owl and it makes the sound Whooo! Whoooo!”
A kid decided to share “Oh! My mom makes that noise when Mom and Dad are having private time in their room!”.

Image credits: SheWhoComesFirst

#18

This literally happened today and the boy didn’t reveal all of it to us but it was still interesting to find out.

My coworkers and I found out that one of our students is a love child. Turns out his dad lied to his mom about his entire identity – name, job, where he lived, etc. He had a wife and kids that he hid from her! When the mom revealed she was pregnant to dad he disappeared and she hired a private investigator to find him. It’s insane.

Image credits: anon

#19

I was about to read a book about a mouse looking for his bed. Before reading I always ask a few warm up questions. I said,” when you go to sleep at night what do you sleep on?” Most kids said a bed or something similar, but then the little girl next to me said,”my daddy sleeps on the couch.”

Image credits: SS_from_1990s

#20

Pretty mild, but a surprising and cute slip up! I was working in a four year old classroom. We’re drawing pictures, having a great time, and a little girl is showing off her art. There’s a stick figure for mommy, daddy, little sister, herself…. and one more. They’re a family of four. I inquire about the fifth stick figure, and the artist casually says “oh that’s the baby in mommy’s belly”. Dad came to pick up that afternoon, and we delicately asked if his wife was expecting (not everyone like to share that info, especially early on). His response? “We forgot to tell (daughter) she couldn’t tell anyone yet!”. Busted via preschool art.

Image credits: lizlemocoolj

#21

I used to do ABA therapy with little kids who have ASD. With one kid, we were doing some pretend play. We were playing restaurant, and I was the waiter while the kid was the customer. I asked her what she wanted to order, and she ordered the pasta. I asked her if she wanted to have a drink with that, maybe some water or a juice? She said “oh I’m the mummy so I’ll have the white wine, please!”

Terribly cute and got a little blush out of the girl’s mum when I told her later on.

Image credits: dahaoab

#22

I work with kids a bit older than that (K-2, so 5-8-ish), but sometimes you hear things.

A 7-year-old once told me he was afraid to go in his parents bedroom because ‘Foxy lives there’. This kid was huge into the whole ‘5 nights at freddie’s’ so I figured it was his imagination going wild. I talked to mom about it, and no. The kid’s dad was a furry and had a fox fursuit in the closet and the kid had found it one day when he went into the closet looking for a place to hide during hide and seek.

Image credits: partofbreakfast

#23

My husband teaches a church class on Sundays for 6 and 7 year olds. I don’t remember what the lesson was on, but he started it by asking if any of the kids knew was geography was. One little kid instantly raised his hand and said “Oh I know what that is! My uncle went to jail for geography!”

Obviously, it wasn’t really geography that was the issue.

Image credits: anon

#24

My brother went to school the day after my parents told my siblings they were pregnant with me and asked the school to pray that our mom wasn’t actually pregnant.

#25

I had a very eloquent four year old tell me that her mom didn’t like white people, only black ones. She was black. I am white.

Image credits: why___me

#26

I’ve worked as a sports coach for kids aged 5-11ish for years.

One summer I was working at holiday club/camp we ran during the school holidays, walking around the field refereeing a game of football (soccer), and this girl and her mate come running up to me (they weren’t interested in playing football, or any sport for that matter really, just wanted a chat)..

Little girl: “my daddy wears earrings” (while looking at my pierced ears)
“Oh does he?”
Little girl: “yeah and sometimes he wears mummy’s dresses too”
“Oh right”
Little girl: “and her shoes!”
“Does he?”
Little girl: “yeah! My daddy’s a pretty girl!”

then skipped off to follow the football around a little more.

#27

Not super shocking, but one of my 4-year-olds’ parents recently divorced. Mom married a new guy and just had a baby with him, and Dad is dating a new lady that the little girl doesn’t like very much. It’s amazing the things kids pick up on, and will tell anyone who listens. She has told me that Daddy and Mommy aren’t together anymore, because “Daddy used to give Mommy bruises and push her.” It’s incredibly sad to hear this sweet little girl say these things, because I can tell she doesn’t fully understand everything.

#28

Finally, something I can answer! First off, kids say a LOT more than parents would probably like to know.
Ive had kids who were playing barbies and one of the” mom” barbies started yelling at the “child” barbies [stuff] like “I wish you were never born! I hate you! I wish i had never carried you” etc. Kids who talk about their parents fights, what they said, where they went and how many doors they slammed. Nothing is off limits at (a good) daycare, because children can’t go through these things alone, and often the parents don’t want to talk about it or they’re the ones causing the problem. It’s heartbreaking really.

#29

From 4 yr olds:

1. Kid-Do you know what my parents are getting?”
Me-“No, what.
Kid-a divorce.
This was said in the most excited voice I’ve heard from a 4 yr old. Had to make a phone call to dad s one.

2. Kid-You want to see my mom when she drinks wine?
Me- Uhhhhh, ok. (Wary about what’s coming)
Kid-pretends to drink wine, yell at everybody then pass out.
I will admit that this was one of the funniest thing I’ve heard/seen while working in childcare. I had to have someone relieve me so I could run to the bathroom to laugh.

I also know the favorite beer of way too many parents and how that beer tastes.

#30

My preschool teacher carefully approached my mom after school one day to talk about adult education. My mother, confused, didn’t know what she was referring to. The teacher persisted that there were many programs available for my father to learn how to read. My dad is a well educated finance manager, but above all, a lazy one.

Apparently the day before we were assigned to ask our fathers to read a story to us. My dad, nicknamed “Roger the Dodger”, sincerely told his first born son he couldn’t read. When I was asked at school what story my dad read me I declared my father was illiterate. Unfortunately this plan obviously backfired for my dear father.

#31

Always remember when my little sister was in reception (about 3/4 yrs old), It was her first parents evening and the teacher said to my dad ‘ah lovely to meet you, We’ve learnt a lot about You.’ She then showed my mum and dad a picture my sister had drew of him with the writing ‘My dad and his big tail.’ Dad was mortified, and we never let my sister live it down.

#32

“The baby went away.”

Her mother had just had a miscarriage and hearing those words out of this cutie’s mouth was like…oh…ouch…my heart.

#33

I’m only a babysitter, but this conversation happened a few weeks ago with a 4 year old:
Child: “Are you pregnant?”
Me: “Nope, I’m not pregnant.”
C: “Are you still a girl?”
M: “Yes, I’m still a girl.”
C: “But how?”
M: “How what?”
C: “How are you a girl if you aren’t pregnant? Mommy’s a girl and she’s ALWAYS pregnant! Daddy’s never pregnant and he’s a boy. So aren’t you a boy?”

And that’s how I found out I would soon be watching 4 kids instead of just 3. I also suggested that the parents have a talk about the differences between boys and girls.

#34

I had a 3 year old rat his dad out for domestic violence. He said his dad broke glass when he threw it at his mommy. There were other red flags with this child so this story was alarming. When I approached the mom she confessed it all and we were able to help her get the help she needed.

#35

I’m so glad this topic has finally been broached. For the age that I work with, pre-VPK, they’re just getting to that brink of starting to understand what’s considered rude to share and what’s just popping into their brain at the moment. Last year we had a little girl whose parents were separated and possibly getting divorced and she told us a few times that her father was sleeping on the couch and that the mother was always angry with him, but one day she came in and dropped a BOMB in front of both mom and dad. The conversation went:

Me: Good morning!!

4 year old girl: Hello! Guess what?!

Me: Oh my gosh. What? (I know, the fake enthusiasm is annoying. Imagine how we feel)

4 year old girl: My daddy’s girlfriend took me to chick-fil-a last night!

At this point the parents were separated and going to couples therapy, as the mom tended to overshare and wanted us to know that their pick up times would be changing depending on the time their appointment was. Mom stormed out and their divorce went on full steam ahead. I felt horrible for her, but I found the outburst slightly funny at the time. Kids, man. Always watching. Always listening.

#36

Late to the party, but I had a 5 year old girl tell me how she went to the mall with her mom over the weekend. They had gone to MAC or Sephora and “mommy took a lipstick and put it in my pocket and we walked out”. It seems like she uses her daughter as a shoplifting mule.

Another young girl talked about how mommy was always mad at daddy for not having a job and going to his friend’s house all the time.

#37

I dated a girl with 2 kids. I was watching them while she went to the doctor. She had a serious medical problem and she wanted the kids to not be there and see her all stressed out. Was watching toy story with her 3 year old daughter. I guess the daughter started understanding that her mom and i are more than friends. She said “would you hit momma?” I was shocked and i said “of course not! What put that idea in your head?” And she teared up and said “my daddy used to hit her.” And she started crying. I just did my best. I explained to her that i would never hurt any of them and how people who love each other should behave and that her dad had a sickness that caused him to act strangely (he was an a****t.) i got her a popsicle and she calmed down as buzz lightyear and woody were flying into the car. I was aware that their dad hit their mom, but i didnt know the daughter witnessed it or would even remember.

#38

Little kid, just kind of babbling age, she couldn’t talk properly but could say a few words. She was playing in the little play house and I heard her yell very clearly “get out of my house, rat [jerk]!” I wonder where she picked that up.

#39

I once had a little girl tell me she saw “daddy licking mommy like a doggy.” That was hilarious and awkward.

There were a handful of really sad cases where children would disclose neglect or “mistreatment”. One girl in particular had a meltdown one day when she had an accident in her underwear. Turned out that her mom would slap her around just gently enough to not leave a mark and lock her in a closet when she “misbehaved,” which included accidents. Needless to say we reported the mother to CPS and did a rush job washing the girls clothing so she could go home in the same clothes she wore to school, without her mom knowing about the accident.

Lots of kids spilling the beans on new pregnancies or divorces, arguments between parents, or infidelity. Kids see and hear a lot and they tend to have incredibly good memory for that kind of stuff.

#40

When my daughter was 2, I had her little brother. Sometime when he was around 9 months old, she got pretty sick of him, and she was also in her DADDY IS KING phase. So she would go around saying, “Daddy is my Daddy, but he’s not Little Brother’s daddy.” I always wondered if she spread that rumor at daycare as well.

#41

My son once told his class – and teacher- that “daddy drinks beer every morning “. It was Pepsi; he did not know the difference.

#42

Not super shocking, but I worked at a daycare for a couple of years and the two stories I remember the most was when a little girl said to me when daddy takes a bath mommy shaves his back, and another little girl that admitted when her dad watches her in the tub, sometimes he would drop a [poop] in the toilet.

That latter one, her dad came to pick her up that day and I could *not* look him in the eye.

#43

Wife runs one.

Had a day off from work and a six year old sits at the table next to me and we start talking about different fish in the world. His parents were divorced and they have split custody, he and his sister only come part time. So I grab my phone and we look up different tropical fish and whatnot.

After a bit he tells me he only likes his mom and sister, hates his dad, step mom, and step brother. Talks about how he is going to light his dad’s house on fire with the people he hates still in it.

I told his step mom about it when she came to pick him up. He went to therapy for a while.

His real mom gets a new live in boyfriend every month or so. Apparently one has given him swirlies a few times and another was a convicted child m**ester. The dad reports this s**t to CPS but they never do anything about it.

#44

This wasn’t so much as a direct confession, but it was definitely not something his momma would want getting out.

While playing a tablet game, the little guy started talking smack to it. Saying things like:

“Imma eat yo butt!” and “Here comes daddy!”

It took everything I had not to [laugh]. I texted my (now) husband about it, so he promptly makes and sends this. I had to excuse myself.

#45

A car accident she was involved in. Cars got totaled, family members in the hospital. She was ok. Didn’t even mention it to anyone until 3 weeks after it happened, either. Didn’t seem phased.

#46

Had a very troubled little girl who was already taken away from her parents and living with the dubious grandparents. She came in one day with a sizeable wound on her head, nearly hidden under a hair band. I was doing one to one work with her in the garden when I notice it and ask what happened. She tells me off-hand that granny got angry and threw a toy car. Followed protocol, reported it, and then it was out of my hands. I wish it was the only thing that I needed to report with her, poor kid.

#47

I was a nanny and one time the 3 year old asked me, out of the blue, “why do daddy and mommy always go ‘uuuhhhhh’ (clearly sexual noises) after bedtime?” I just burst out laughing and said that maybe they are working out.

#48

Taught pre-K for about 12 years. Had this kid that was crouching behind a bookcase. Upon closer inspection he had a gum wrapper and the contents of our pencil sharpener and was rolling a joint.

Had a kid tell me that his mom had a secret and he wanted to share it with me. He the told me about their roach problem and how he’s not supposed to talk about it at school. That one made me laugh.

Kids tell everything. I know that your marriage isn’t working out, your finances. Kids will tell it all.

#49

I’m putting together a book for my kiddo for when she graduates high school called “Texts from Daycare.” I have taken screenshots of all the texts I would get throughout the five years she was there.

Once I was giving her a bath – I think she was about three – and she wanted to use my body wash, and I must not have rinsed the washcloth well enough when I cleaned her privates. It burned and I felt so bad. I texted daycare (her daycare provider is a friend of mine whom I’ve known since kindergarten) that night to let her know what happened because I *knew* she’d say “Mommy burnt my hoo-ha.” The texts I got the next day could only be described as “epic.” She said something like “Mommy used her soap on my hoo-ha and it burned and I cried. But I told mommy I know she didn’t mean it but don’t ever use that burn soap again. I watched tv and I stopped crying but then I cried again because I had hot pee and mommy felt really bad so I said no more burn soap.”

If I weren’t so close with my daycare provider that could’ve ended very badly, possibly with a visit from DCF.

#50

I’m a nanny and one day the four-year-old girl that I take care of told me that she got out of her bed in the middle of the night to go to her parent’s room and saw “Daddy helping mommy stretch” in bed. Not shocking but I got a nice chuckle out of that one.

#51

Not daycare, but interning at a school. I was in one class a lot and there was that one boy who took to me right away. He seemed a bit lonely and socially awkward and sought out adults rather than other kids.
The second day he told me his mom left him and his dad about a year ago because she “didn’t want him anymore”and he had just lost his grandma last month and now he was sad all the time.
Another time he and another kid were lingering around after school out and I jokingly asked them if they could not get enough of school.
He said no, he’d rather always be in school because at home he was always alone and that he hated the weekends. Also all his dad did was work and complain. If he could he would want to sleep in school. I really didn’t know what to say to that.
The kid was super bright and on top of his class but so sad. I talked to the teachers about him and they confirmed he had a pretty sad and [messed up] up home life.

#52

Once caught a little boy trying to put a broom handle up another boys bum and when we asked why he said “that’s what mommy and daddy do at home”. Super awkward since his mom was actually the owner of the daycare!

#53

A little late to the party, but I feel like sharing anyway.

My mom is a daycare provider, and a 3 year old once told her that the police came to his house and his dad’s girlfriend made everyone hide under the bed. At first she thought maybe it was a game they were playing, but he continued to tell her how scared he was when it happened. His dad and dad’s girlfriend were arrested not long after.

#54

One of my children told me “Mummy says I can’t play on Daddy’s phone because that’s where he keeps his girls”.

#55

A 3 year old told me he had belly aches everyday because mommy gave him to much sleepy juice. I said what’s what? He didn’t know. I brought it up to her and she said like it was all normal and fine, even with a little laugh “ah, yeah sometimes I give him a little bit to much NyQuil because the little [one] doesn’t sleep” and I was like Uhm no child that age should have any NyQuil! She laughed it off and said “oh he’s been getting it since he was a year old, nothing bad has happened.” And on top of that the kids always came in smelling like strong weed. CPS was called.

#56

Not a day care worker, but….

I used to have a tax practice. A client came into my office to drop off his tax paperwork with his five kids (ages 3-10) in tow. He said he needed to go run an errand and left, leaving the kids in my office. For me to babysit while I worked on his taxes.

The kids were shy, quiet and well behaved, but the youngest finally started a conversation with me:

“My daddy hits my mommy.”.

#57

Not a daycare worker, but something rather similar. I helped with foster children for a long time.
She also told me that when she was a little tiny her mom put her in a crib and a scary man came into the room and grabbed mommy and jumped all over her while mommy screamed ‘no my baby is watching stop stop!’.

#58

Used to work at a daycare and the cutest little red headed boy said I have to go drain my snake. He told us that’s how his uncle announces he has to go to the washroom. That was 25 years ago and I’ll never forget it!

#59

I worked at a gym childcare center in high school and a pair of four year old twins (one who appeared to be menrally disabled) with an older sister came in. Not 3 year olds but not very old. The little boy had these weird scars all over his arms and legs like old cut marks healed over. The older girl, maybe 5 or 6, noticed me looking and calmly explained that it was from when his twin sister had gone after him with a knife and rolled up her sleeves to show me the same marks all over her arms. Apparently the younger girl had serious issues and her parents apologized for not warning me when they came to pick her up. Never saw them again. Creepiest little girl I’ve ever seen.

#60

My nephew outed my brother in law for cheating one morning at breakfast. He and my sister were separated but ‘working it out’ until little Cam said ‘Mistress was over for breakfast this morning!’.

#61

Not a family secret but on more than one occasion I was the first to witness a kid take their first steps.

The first time I mentioned “ohh he was walking around like such a big boy!” The mom almost fell down in shock so I realized my mistake and said “while I held his hands!” The next week she let us know “he took his first steps!!!” After that I never mentioned it when a kid walked for the first time.

There was also the frequent outing that mommy has a baby in her belly or that mommy and daddy get real mad at each other and say loud words.

#62

Speech pathologist who has mainly worked with kids here. My job is literally to get your kid to talk. They will 100% tell us whatever is going on with your family from financial troubles, to finding our they’re pregnant, or the crucial detail that their visiting grandmother has allergies. Whatever really seems important to them at the time. Luckily my clients have had pretty stable home lives so nothing too dramatic, but I know probably too much about the families.

#63

I had a student in my class, age 3, who was constantly dropped off by his barefoot mom without any underwear. Granted, he was completely potty-trained so it wasn’t a huge deal and I just figured out they were hippies. So one day, we’re coloring and talking about superheroes and punching comes up. “My mommy punches me,” to which I responded, “you mean like this?” and I gave him a light friendly nudge like “hey you!” and he shook his head. “No like this.” and he SLAMMED his fist down on the table. So I told him that it was a good thing he told me, asked for a subsitute to take a “potty time” (which was our code for “I need help from a senior employee” – if you actually needed to pee, you used the term “potty break.”) My manager met me in the front office and we filed a complain with the CPS. Unfortunately, I gave birth about a week later and never returned, so I don’t know what became of him :(.

#64

In college, I did work study in the campus daycare. One of the little boys, probably about 3, told us that his mom fed him shark with blood last night. It was shark steaks with ketchup. Still funny.

#65

Not a daycare worker, but this is pretty relevant. When I was in elementary school, we had this program where some of the older kids would read to the younger kids. I was in 6th grade and we were all paired up with a kindergartener. The mother of the kindergartener that I got was friends with my mom, and she told me one day that her mom told her I was adopted. I didn’t know this at the time but she was right, I am in fact adopted. So in a way, I learned my own family’s secret from a young kid lol.

#66

Not a daycare worker, but once when I was babysitting a three-year-old she told me “Daddy sleeps on the couch” as she was drifting off to sleep. Her parents divorced within the year. This wasn’t a shocking secret I guess… just sad.

#67

Not a daycare worker, but my kid likes to tell everyone, including complete strangers, what goes on in our family. Quick background… I work for local government. My car was in the shop so my wife needed to pick me up after work. I guess the kid was going around telling everyone about how he needed “to go pick up my daddy at the police station” after preschool. Good times!

#68

Not me but my girlfriend teaches 2 year olds. “Aunt Sarah and her new boyfriend made the camper rock and were making all kinds of weird noises but I can’t tell anybody”

#69

My mom ran a daycare and there was this little boy ill call JJ.
JJs parents split up during his moms pregnancy with him. Soon after she had JJ,she started dating and became serious with this guy named Artie. She became pregnant w Arties child when JJ was 3. One day,Artie was dropping JJ off and picking him up. Soon as Artie left, JJ told my mom
“Hartie (Artie) gave his numba to a white girl!!”
(JJ,his mom and Artie are black)

My mom hurried to change the subject and gave “Hartie” the heads up later when he came to pick JJ up.
Don’t think JJs mom ever found out.

#70

My son told his first grade teacher that my wife and I were separated. The teacher tried to sympathize with my wife where she got the surprise that we were not separating or even had an argument. Someone had a long talk.

#71

was at a small wedding recently and an attending child announced in front of all of the guests that her father (present) had attacked his mother (not present) with a chair. Surprisingly, he took it rather calmly.

#72

My darling bundle of joy really wanted (still wants) a sibling at the age of 3-4. I told him daddy and I are trying. That there might be a baby in my belly soon enough. This of course leads him to telling his carers that I’m already pregnant just about every week.

After a year of trying we figured out we can’t have any more kids. So then he goes around taking everyone we can’t have any kids…

Kids really know how to make things awkward.

#73

Had a 3 yo kid tell me that he wanted to go home because his Dad was coming back from jail again & he wanted to see him. My heart broke.

#74

I was sitting with a child who was playing and out of no where she says, ‘Sometimes mommy yells at daddy, I don’t like that.’

#75

3 yr olds dont really tend to tell family secrets. Most of the funny or memorable things they have to say are more misunderstandings than anything else.

But one of the things I remember most is going around the class talking about families. We talked about who was in their family, where they lived, how much we love our family, etc. When we got to one littlw boy, he explained, “I live with my mommy and my daddy… my daddy lives at work!” He wasnt at all bothered by his statement, it was just fact to him but it broke my heart a little.

#76

Not a secret (and not a daycare worker, but I do work with young children at a private tutoring company) but a little girl (just turned 6) at my workplace once turned to another girl who was being disruptive and calmly said “go and see a therapist darling, you sound like you need one.” It was hilarious at the time but also kinda sad that the girl had heard that phrase often enough to be able to parrot it during an argument.

#77

Old girlfriend’s mom used to travel for work often and would leave her with her father for days on end. She says that her daughter would say that she was “Warm Belly” when mom came back from her trips, and “Cold belly” when she was gone. Girlfriend’s mom figured her daughter just missed her. Come to find out that the dad wasn’t feeding her when the mom went on these trips.

#78

Not a teacher but I had my daughters kindergarten teacher inform me that my daughter yelled at her classmates because someone brought in jello for a class party. Everyone knows that there is booze in jello and she made sure everyone knew it. I didn’t realize I have never given my kids jello but I have sure made a lot of shooters out of it.

The teacher laughed and asked for my recipes.

#79

Not a daycare worker, but a lawyer who volunteers at a homeless shelter for women and kids.

I went in with a group to discuss some needs that we could meet for the shelter (specifically, trying to get permission to bring in a bookshelf and donate books, because they had NO BOOKS for kids, FFS). This little guy, maybe 2.5 years old, ran over to us and yelled YO, ARE YOU COPS?!?

#80

“Mommy cooks food and yells a lot. Daddy plays video games and speaks Japanese”. Not really a family secret, but a pretty hilarious response to the question: what does mommy and daddy do for work?

#81

One of my 3 year old kids told me that she had another sister. I knew she only had an older brother so I asked if mommy was having another baby. She shook her head and said that daddy put her little sister in a cold lake and never got her. I felt my heart drop and asked her to repeat what she said to the teachers. She did and we ended up having to get the managers and call someone. They did an investigation into her parents and home life and they found nothing, parents claimed she had seen something similar on a horror movie her big brother let her watch.

Even though she moved out of my classroom, I still can’t look at her the same.

#82

Basically that mommy and daddy fight a lot, and sometimes she has to take her brother and hide because they get too loud when they’re yelling.

She only had a sister. I was really confused by that part. The rest was sad though.

#83

A new girl was in class during a DARE presentation. It was early spring and I had banks of grow light on for a class project.

DARE officer asks if there on any questions. The new girl asks, “What are those lights for? My mom has those set up in s closet and she won’t tell me what they’re for.”.

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