The word “psychosis” comes with a lot of stigma. Most people imagine that it involves a mental breakdown and happens only to people with mental illnesses. But, according to experts, psychosis can happen to anyone.
In fact, three out of 100 young people in the U.S. will likely experience a psychotic episode. Other studies show that between 15 and 100 people in 100,000 might develop psychosis each year.
To raise awareness about what psychosis is and what happens during an episode, one Redditor recently asked people to share their experiences. “Let’s try to eliminate stigma,” they wrote. “Redditors who experienced psychosis, what were your worst delusions/hallucinations?”
In the name of solidarity and education, some brave folks went on to share their strangest, most terrifying, and interesting psychosis experiences.
Bored Panda reached out to the Redditor who opened up this discussion, u/Long-Description1797. She kindly agreed to share her own experiences and why it’s important that we talk about mental health more openly. Read our conversation down below!
#1
Post partum psychosis and sleep deprivation. I saw spiders crawling all over the ceiling and was terrified they would fall on the baby.
Image credits: LonelyHarley
The author of this thread opened up to Bored Panda that she has experienced psychosis, too. “I’m a young professional who has had three episodes of serious psychosis throughout her adult life, each episode worse than the last.”
“I was inspired to post the thread because my third episode came out of nowhere, and afterwards I felt incredibly lost and didn’t feel like I could talk about my experiences with those I cared about without making myself and them feel alienated due to the unnecessary stigma of the condition. It was so isolating,” u/Long-Description1797 tells us.
#2
Funny story: my bf at the time had psychosis (still does) and a common visual+tactile hallucination that came on from stress was “there are bugs crawling on me”, and needed a camera, a second set of eyes, or a good few minutes to discern the truth. Poor thing stayed over my place in a farmhouses apartment in the spring, and wakes up from a dead sleep “b0rb there’s bugs on me”. I assure it’s a hallucination, everything is fine, “no b0rb i need you to turn on the light and check”
reader. it was ladybug season and apparently my room was the Love Bug Hotel that night. i felt SO bad and never doubted double checking a bug hallucination again.
Image credits: birbyb0rb
#3
I had a mental break years ago from family stress and trauma combined with insomnia.
I had become convinced that I was infact Dead.
I couldn’t process peoples faces, they looked blurry and out of focus. In that state I was in I believed that at any moment the grim reaper would appear to collect me and I had somehow been forgotten. I stopped eating entirely and only drank small amounts of water.
A week of believing i was dead passed and a thought occurred “I look sick but, I’m not rotting.”
I went to a hospital and started treatment after that. I’ll never forget how real it all felt to me.
Image credits: Obscurm1
Indeed, a psychotic episode can really happen to anyone, no matter their age, social status, or other circumstances. According to the Yale School of Medicine, only 25% of people who experience an episode will never have one again. 50% may have more than one episode, but, as experts stress, they will be able to live normal lives. So, it’s not surprising that u/Long-Description1797 had such an experience.
“I realised that a hub for anyone going through psychosis didn’t really exist, so I wanted to create one instead on Reddit to eliminate stigma, encourage others to talk openly about their experiences, educate the public about psychosis and its warning signs, and share my own personal experiences with the illness,” the Redditor tells us.
#4
I almost jumped off a fourth floor window saying I wanted to “experience true free fall”. I had 3 classmates trying to talk me down and I just couldn’t understand the concept of being dead or hurt. It was like I had no idea what pain feels like, and I couldn’t comprehend the mere idea that it could happen to me.
Then a fourth classmate saw, went to the school cafeteria, got my favorite candy and lured me off the windowsill with it. She told me if I got off the window, she would give me one, and of I waited until tomorrow to jump, she would give me a second one at the end of the day. I agreed. Somehow the promise of a kitkat was more compelling than the risk of death or lifelong disability or broken bones.
That day 3 of my classmates walked with me all the way home, making sure to not let me walk straight into traffic, and told my parents what happened. Nobody told any of the teachers or school admin, and I’m not sure why.
This was 12th grade and we were 16-18yo so we were left unsupervised at school frequently, which is why no staff noticed this going on. I don’t remember most of this, btw. My classmates told me later, once I was back to class.
Image credits: am_i_boy
#5
I still suffer from this I just live it wit but I always see this person standing in the corner of the room at times just watching me. Was a guy we lost when I was deployed VA thinks I’m making it up no brain tumors no rhyme or reason why just stands there staring at me doesn’t talk though life is otherwise normal.
Image credits: Clean-Highway4021
#6
When I get sick sometimes (flu/cold) I do experience psychosis, and its to the point that I tie myself to the bed when I feel it coming, just so I don’t get myself in trouble.
Its kinda hard to explain the experience. Its always the same. Its a hallucination where something mundane suddenly feels huge, and that its multiplying itself. It feels as if this thing will in an instant multiply so much that it will fill the whole universe, and everyone will die. And its somehow my fault.
When its hits, I feel like I’m having a panic attack, because of how dire this crisis is. I cannot think straight. There’s only fear. One time, it felt like toilet paper rolls were filling up the space in my room, So I ran to my balcony and began throwing out the rolls, but they never lessened.
I feel so afraid when it happens that I am willing to do anything to make the fear go away.
Image credits: Deadboy_Uli
As a person who experienced several psychotic episodes, u/Long-Description1797 agreed to share with us the most harmful misconceptions of psychosis she has observed.
That people with psychosis are strange, fundamentally defective and/or different from others. “People with psychosis are just people, often with amazingly perceptive or creative sensitivities I might add,” the Redditor points out.
“[They] have usually gone through an incredibly stressful or otherwise difficult time in life, and their brain has reasonably reacted to this by creating a different reality to escape and make sense of the suffering of their current one. It’s actually a very clever adaptive response to trauma and stress. It should really be seen that way.”
#7
Didn’t happen to me personally but an old friend went down deep to the point that he was convinced his neighbors had Obama tied up in their basement. So, naturally, he realized he had to go and save the president. Literally broke into the neighbor’s place, cops came and he went to jail. AND he got a lot of help and is waaaay better now.
Image credits: Engelgrafik
#8
I saw people standing in my room just watching me while I slept. I asked them who they were & why they were there but they would only smile & not answer me. I also saw little birds coming out of my bathtub drain one at a time. I called my mother to show her & ask her how that was even possible. Yea, I ended up 5150’d. I’m glad I didn’t see anything horrifying!
Image credits: Peanut2ur_Tostito
#9
When I gave up alcohol, there was a period where reality felt like overcooked noodles.
I swear I hear a violin playing in the background that fades off when I try to listen for it
And time flows weird. Like I felt like I have lived for months, not it’s only a literal couple of hours. Or I think, wow I did that in 2 minutes, and the clock actually said it’s 2+hours.
Image credits: beamerpook
People with psychosis can be dangerous or violent towards other people. This one, according to u/Long-Description1797, was probably born out of people’s fear of the unknown. She says it’s quite the opposite. “People who have or are experiencing psychosis are in a very vulnerable position and are much, much more likely to sadly be victims of horrific violence, discrimination, [mistreatment] and hate crimes,” the Redditor explains.
“This is unfortunately endemic in our culture from schools to hospitals to workplaces and needs to be changed. We dehumanise people the instant they develop signs of serious mental illness, and this needs to stop.”
#10
It’s been a while since I had a manic episode, and I’m not sure it’s exactly psychosis, but when I was an unmedicated teen I had more prolonged and consistent hallucinations.
I think the worst depends on how you interpret worst, I don’t remember ever being scared of what was in my head, it was the lack of control, lack of ability to articulate my thoughts or communicate clearly, the unpredictability of other people and the situation, all of the external things were what was scary, and even then it was more frustrating and disorienting than scary.
The vast majority my hallucinations were audio so that might also be a factor, but if I was ever freaking out or panicking it was usually because I couldn’t process information normally and was aware of that, like imagine your legs stopped working, whenever you moved the muscles or did the motions to move your legs they just floo around unexpectedly, but while you’re in the middle of running for your life, it feels like that but for your mind.
Image credits: Nomiknowsme
#11
I have bipolar and was diagnosed but not on a strong enough dose of meds. My most severe delusions were related to the devil, who I thought was stalking and following me. I was on a holiday visiting my mom. I wasn’t in full blown psychosis so I knew to hide it. I thought the devil was hiding in the furnace room. She took me out on a kayak and I saw the sky reveal itself to be another sky that was red and hellfire and the devil was enormous. We saw some bald eagles in their nest and I thought they were the devil’s minions. My family kept asking me why I was so agitated. That was fun. A few days later and a med increase, the delusions calmed down but I got really obsessed with the Bible for a bit. I’m not religious at all.
Image credits: dykedrama
#12
I was actively dying from a heart virus, was in so much pain i was on tramadol so i could get out of bed. The pain was so bad i accepted death and was waitingfor it to take me out, but i survived, and physically healthy today. The tramadol + stress + pain made me see shadow people when it was dark, i heard voices when it was quite but they were either whispers or when load it was not human. Its been a decade since i recovered but i still cant be left alone without audio stimuli or i fear the voices will return. I need complete darkness or im afraid i will see the shadows again. Still have some anxiety issues but funny enough, i have no problem sleeping in the woods by myself, its loud and completely dark so i dont get triggered. Haven’t seen or heard the shadows or voices in a decade but when your mind cracks like that, it doesnt really heal, it scars.
Also my bodies sense went out of wack, i do not feel my heartbeat anymore, like no matter how much cardio i do, i dont feel it. I have to use a tracker to make sure i dont get hurt. The only time i feel my heart is when i get stressed, then i have ptsd and feel the same chest pains i felt when i was dying. So thats not much fun
Overall 3/10 do not recommend, literally mentally scaring.
Image credits: Flat-Limit5595
That there’s no recovery from psychosis. Some people hold the belief that someone who experiences psychosis is “a lost cause” and can’t ever recover the way they were before. “This is also very untrue,” the Redditor tells Bored Panda. “I survived a psychotic episode at university and still managed to get my Bachelor’s degree.”
#13
Worst: a premonition that took over every aspect of my life and I thought would result in my death, leading me to an intensive outpatient program (one of a few reasons). I’ve crafted some of the way it “came true” and found ways to grow from it.
Funniest: when I was younger I was entirely convinced one night that all my socks were puppies that I had to take care of. I don’t remember how amused my mom was, ha.
Image credits: ComprehensiveFly2824
#14
I’ve had psychotic depression a few times where I have been convinced that my brain is rotting and full of maggots. I can smell an overwhelming disgusting stench of rotting flesh, and I can feel maggots wriggling around in my brain. The cognitive effects of the psychosis make it feel like my brain is shutting down because it’s being consumed. Freaky stuff.
Image credits: GideonGodwit
#15
I started thinking this guy — who was someone I knew from a professional context through a coworker slash friend — was a crowned prince of France. I thought, of course he has his own security detail, which has set up a stake out operation in my apartment. I was madly in love with him, and, one day he just ghosted me. To my added brain, he was protecting my by separating himself from me, and we could communicate through the police, anyway. This meant photographers in the bushes, cameras in and all around the apartment, and my every move being watched. Even through two hospitalizations, I still believe this because it was part of my job, as a princess, to say nothing about my secret mission. I have a lot more to tell, if people are interested.
Image credits: Quadrilaterally
“I survived another one and managed to land a great job. And, hopefully, I’ll be able to overcome my most recent period of severe illness. It’s highly possible for a person to fully recover and emerge stronger and more grounded than before. Having supportive family, found-family, friends or neighbours is really important and greatly influences the course of the illness and recovery.”
#16
Whoever’s reading this, you have permission to laugh:
When I was in high school, I often had rapid cycling with mania, depression, and a s**t ton of mixed episodes. One thing I’ve noticed is that when my manic episodes start, the *”theme”* of my episode would be the last thing I was interested in.
So in summer 2023, I gained a huge interest in the song “Teir Abhaile Riu” by Celtic Woman. It’s catchy, mesmerizing, and I played that song on repeat like it was no tomorrow. Cue the manic episode, I started increasingly obsessing over Irish culture and researching everything about Ireland for days and nights on end which soon turned into an obsession over if I’m Irish myself.
Now mind you, my mother is African American and my dad is Trinidadian. Any reasonable person would understand that there’s not a single drop of Irish in my blood (that I know of at least). But wait- it gets worse! So I started using ancestry.com and tried my HARDEST to find a spec of Irish somewhere in my family. Why? Because in my mind, I thought that if I were to find someone who’s Irish in my family, I would be able to live with them in Ireland, leaving my entire life behind me. I remember telling my mother a lot, “I’m going to move to Ireland and never come back”.
Long story short, I didn’t find anything- but that was when I had another idea to try and convince my mother to buy an AncestryDNA test to find out that way instead. My mom said no because it’s too expensive, so in return, I went on the internet and tried to sell myself for money for the DNA test. And well… I made the money! But I think this is when the spiral started happening and the depressive episode started to kick in because I genuinely don’t remember anything after this point.
Shoot, I didn’t even mention the parts of how many times I embarrassed myself publicly on my instagram story with spamming a s**t ton of different things about Ireland. I made a *lot* of people uncomfortable, and it sucks because not only did I not have a good support system to get me treatment—but also I didn’t understand the gravity of my actions *until* it was all over.
By the way, the money I got didn’t end up going to the DNA test, I spent it all on a huge platter of sushi.
Image credits: hellohoomansOoP
#17
I’ve had two breaks in my life. The first came a year after my daughter died. I feel like the guilt and grief took hold of me, and it was inevitable that, at some point, I would break. It started with hearing her. She was very ill so it didn’t sound like a normal baby’s cry. Then, I kept feeling like I was pregnant again. It even felt like my milk was coming back in. I’d start to see her in every baby I saw. Then the paranoid thoughts began, and I would panic that she was buried but not dead. I’d sleep at her grave. I ended up spending 3 days in a mental health facility. I didn’t follow up with any aftercare and was never offered any counselling or bereavement therapy. This was 22 years ago.
The second break came when I was pregnant 7 years after my daughter died. I can remember hearing whispers that she wasn’t going to survive and that I was never meant to be a mum. Then, I would see shadows moving towards me. I would run to work to stop them from getting me. Eventually, I couldn’t leave my room at all. I locked myself in my room for 5 days before my family got doctors and police to remove me. I was hospitalised in a mental health ward for 9 weeks. I can remember not even knowing how to speak or eat. It was like my mind had shattered entirely under the weight of my grief and guilt. I was too frightened to accept I was pregnant in case she would die, too. It took years of intense therapy to recover. I was given bereavement counselling as well. This was life-changing. It helped me realise I was a good mum and never left her side. I wasn’t to blame for her death.
I carried so much shame, guilt and grief. Never talk to anyone about it. It crushes a person in unimaginable ways. It’s changed my perception of grief and mental health.
Image credits: lalaprice2385
#18
Here’s my story – I remember everything. Every terrifying, confusing moment. Here goes. Have a history of complex trauma. My illness created something long and elaborate, so naturally this comment will be long and elaborate. This is difficult for me to share. I thought I could reduce my meds and was under extreme levels of several stressful life events, good and bad, lined up in quick succession. That’s the kicker. That’s what did it.
I truly believed I was on a special mission from God. I thought I was chosen and that my friends and family were possessed and persecuting me. Animals seemed kind because they sensed something holy in me. Colors around me exploded like bright mosaics. I believed movies were a prophecy about me, that I was destined for something extraordinary.
One day, while on a walk, I tripped and fell in front of a church. To me, it was a sign that I had to be baptized, or my life would be doomed.
When my dog was pregnant with a litter of puppies, I was convinced it was part of God’s plan — that I had to keep one of the litter to fulfill a divine purpose. But when I asked a lady to help rehome the puppies, I became terrified, thinking she was possessed by demons trying to ruin God’s plan. I believed I was the reincarnation of Jesus, carrying His spirit.
When my dog was spayed, I was terrified. My head said it was the right thing, but my illness screamed no. Afterward, I believed that procedure had “spayed” my own potential – that my spiritual and feminine energy had been corrupted beyond repair. I thought death and resurrection were the only ways to save me. At this point I should have gone to my doctor and told him everything but I was living solo and didn’t think I was ill, just spiritually attuned. I told a family member that I was scared and felt s******l. She told me that people that are really serious about killing themselves do it instead of telling others about it. I was profoundly wounded from this statement.
So I wandered into freezing wilderness, thinking I might die but also simultaneously that God would somehow protect me. I became dangerously cold and exhausted, then returned home and drank warm tea to survive. I feared the cold had caused irreversible brain damage.
I went weeks without food or water, convinced my salvation depended on following strict “holy rules” like a video game – where good and bad actions affected my spiritual health, taking or adding points. Objects, clothes, even people had sacred or dark energies. I believed my left hand was “bad,” my right hand “good.” I was severely starving and dehydrated which worsened my experience.
A demon spoke through me, promising salvation if I obeyed his strict commands. I tried to purge the demon with a very hot shower, but it didn’t work.
Eventually, I believed I had died and was trapped alone with no other living thing in this purgatory realm, punished for trying to end my life. I thought God and heaven no longer existed, and that Satan ruled everything.
I saw Satan watching me in my house. He had sharp teeth and the eyes of a predatory snake. He was salivating. He could read my thoughts. Satan told me my family had died because I hadn’t converted them to Christianity. He possessed my “dead” body in another timeline/plane of existence in the hospital I had “died” in. I believed paramedics had implanted a chip in my brain after I had died, condemning me to eternal, virtual, solitary suffering. There was the virtual world created by the chip, and the outside real world I could not access or sense. In a way, this elaborate delusion wasn’t wrong in the existential sense. My mind was indeed creating a world of its own, separate from real reality.
A friend helped get me to safety, but I thought the world was an artificial holographic prison created by Satan and others. I wouldn’t eat or drink, fearing poison or spiritual corruption, often both.
When my dad took me to the hospital, I thought it was Satan’s headquarters. I saw staff as demons. The hospital was a labyrinth of hell. I believed my cross necklace was the only protection.
I refused most food and water, terrified it was made from human remains or “demonic” ingredients. I felt putrefying disgust and horror every time I ate, convinced demons were forcing me into sins I couldn’t undo.
After months of aggressive treatment, the delusions faded. I began eating again and was eventually discharged.
I can’t fully explain the terror I experienced. It was beyond anything I imagined. This happened as I was making progress in my life and career, and it nearly destroyed me. A really s****y experience all round. I have to start all over again. This is the third time in my twenties I have had to start again and rebuild.
But I’m still here, somehow. Sharing this helps me feel a bit less alone and maybe it can help others feel this way too. It was pure hell; the horrors of a highly creative imagination brought to terrifying life. I don’t ever want to experience anything like that ever again.
Image credits: Long-Description1797
u/Long-Description1797 feels very passionate about eliminating the stigma of psychosis and mental illness in general. “Stigma makes us isolate, and others isolate from us. Isolation is a very strong catalyst for developing the illness,” the Redditor points out.
“And even if you don’t have a strong support network, having hope you will get better – and fully choosing to believe it every single day, choosing to fight with hope in your deepest core despite the suffering and pain of it all – that’s even more crucial to getting better.
“People who’ve endured such a thing are astoundingly brave, and we need to recognise that. We are survivors. Warriors of the psyche.”
#19
Adderall-induced psychosis. I had a psychotic break in middle school. I have religious trauma. I was having an episode where I literally climbing up the wall. My mom held me down and tried to perform an exorcism on me lol. I saw her face as a demon on a doorknob. I was like her face but every small wrinkle was deeper and black and her skin was white and c*****d kinda. I was convinced that the rapture was gonna happen at any moment so I would store food under my bed so that if my family didn’t go to heaven and we were stuck in my room, we would have food. I have struggled with thoughts like this a lot. I have OCD so it’s hard to decipher if some thoughts are intrusive or psychotic. An example was that on 4/20/Easter, I smoked pot and I didn’t pray that day. The Pope died and I was convinced that he died because of the “sinful” acts that I and the world committed that day. .
Image credits: ElectricalEconomy170
#20
I suffered from delusional disorder and psychosis. I had an imaginary relationship with a woman named Lvy. I thought she was sending me messages and emails. Unfortunately, the replies I sent to these imaginary emails and messages did exist. I was sending these replies to colleagues, friends, and even some of my students. One of my students responded pretending to be Lvy and we ended up having a year long relationship during which I alternated between thinking she was Lvy and understanding who she was.
Ultimately, someone complained about getting weird messages from me and the university did an investigation into my messages. I didn’t know Lvy wasn’t real until I was put on antipsychotics.
I lost my career and marriage.
Image credits: Bladeace
#21
The worst episodes for me tend to happen when I’m walking somewhere alone, I’ll see people peaking out from behind cars, bins, corners, whatever, watching me, and if I look away, they get closer, often times they’re horribly malformed, bordering inhuman, if I look away long enough, I can hear and feel them running towards me at full speed, I can almost see it from their perspective, it’s like I’m being hunted for sport, only, the hunter can teleport and enjoys scaring me.
Image credits: DiscardedRibs
In many ways, Reddit can be a great place for survivors to come and tell their stories. “I think Reddit is great for reducing stigma surrounding psychosis for several reasons,” u/Long-Description1797 agrees.
- “It’s accessed by a massive amount of knowledge-hungry people eager to have their existing views and biases challenged;
- “It’s anonymous, which allows people to not be so worried about their real-life identities being known;
- “And it’s really rather good at fostering a very strong sense of community spirit.”
#22
It went on for a solid year straight and was a gradual descent into full blown psychosis.
I was heavily abusing stimulants for a long time… well, any d**g really, but being who I am and how my brain is wired, stimulants gave me the best feeling comparatively.
I remember the first spark of the paranoia like it was yesterday. I was cleaning out my old apartment, having moved most of everything into the other one. By then I had graduated to smoking c*ke off of foil, then quickly went to cr*ck. Took a big hit like I had done so many times before, and suddenly something clicked in my head.
I stared out the window and thought, “Does that look like a cop?”
It was like someone else’s voice screamed it across some other dimension. Like an echo already bounced back a few times. Then it got louder and louder. Every time I took I hit I swore I could hear them. See them.
I started reading novels in my stucco-covered walls. I could see all of the awful things I’d done in my life written out in the patterns. Everything was critical, every word was harsh and packed with vitriol and disgust at my current state.
I could hear them tunneling through the walls. They were coming for me at all times. I would watch Apple Maps and truly SEE that it was a live feed of the police raid on my house. All of my neighbors were in on it. If they were outside, they had weapons and were ready to strike.
The trees spelled messages to me. All from the police. I would see helicopters flying above my apartment, ready to unleash hell. They were outside my studio’s door. They were waiting.
They had planted trackers in everything. I destroyed every book I owned, tore apart most of my clothes. Destroyed every electronic except my phone.
This isn’t even anywhere near all of it. And I remember it all.
I’d smoke a couple grams and be on the floor bawling, begging for my life from the nonexistent police that were about to break my door down.
All of this was about a year and a half before I even tried m**h. It got worse once I started shooting that s**t up. There’s so much more I can tell yall.
Image credits: sgtfunkadelic
#23
Sitting alone in my apartment with my dog of 14 (at the time) years. To me he looked like he was going to lunge and k**l me. It was a battle of who was going to k**l who first. The psychosis was so strong I literally almost killed my dog. Thankfully I am now medicated and my pupper is still with me, turning 16 this month.
Image credits: syncopation_fracture
#24
During psychosis I was often or usually aware I wasn’t well. Plus it wasn’t consistent. So many changes throughout a day or from one day to the next. Extreme mood swings. So much anxiety and paranoia. Sort of like psychosis was the result of too much prolonged stress. But ya know, recovery from psychosis is a different thing and also sucks. Can take a long time. Like a year or two.
Image credits: Sillybugger126
The author also wished to express her gratitude to everyone who showed interest in her thread. “I’m so thankful to Reddit as a platform, and to the hundreds of people who bravely shared their stories with me, and to the over half a million people curious enough to click on my post,” she tells us. “From the bottom of my heart, thank you.”
#25
It’s been a couple of years since I’ve really dealt with this but around like 2020 I saw something that really kinda f****d me up for a bit, this was also during a really low point in my life. Just seeing that and also already having a really stressful time in my life I just went into psychosis. Seeing what I saw every time I closed my eyes eventually turned into thinking that my head was going to suddenly explode or something was going to suddenly cause my head to be obliterated the same exact way I saw happen. I had moments where the fear was so real that I’d stop what I was doing, curl up, hold my head like it was somehow going to keep everything in if I did and I’d cry because I was so scared. Even when I was at a friends house I’d be perfectly fine and then out of nowhere I can’t focus on them because everything in my mind is screaming at me that my head would explode and my friends would be absolutely traumatized by seeing that and I was scared because I didn’t want them to see that too. I became really paranoid too. I started worrying that my family was purposefully trying to poison me and ruin my life and I became very distrustful of them during this time. I also stopped being able to recognize myself in the mirror, I was just looking at a complete stranger, so I would take a sheet and cover up the bathroom mirror. I stayed in the hospital as a result of this psychosis for a couple of weeks. The hospital stay didn’t really help tbh and neither did the therapy afterwards, but since then I’ve put a lot of work into myself to break out of it.
Image credits: I_Am-Kenough
#26
Alcohol induced psychosis: I was convinced a group of people were trying to break into my apartment and bedroom to murder me.
Image credits: chevroletchaser
#27
I was walking home from work in 2021 and smelled smoke. I was convinced, sure, positive than my house had burned down while I was at work. I rushed home and stood on the sidewalk crying, because I swear my house was charred.
I was able to snap out of it relatively quickly by going up to my porch and touching my house, but I’ll never forget the feeling of horror and the certainly that my house had completely burned.
Image credits: ActualLiteralHobbit
#28
I started thinking i was a clairvoyant and was able to hear thoughts. I was thinking people who were talking around only i was able to hear them because I had special powers.
I thought my computers were all hacked and someone is constantly watching me through hidden cameras even in my home.
I started thinking people were out to k**l me because I didn’t mind or talk to a girl who i was deluded into thinking she liked me. And i started hearing voices some of which i still hear. I thought everyone in my family was betraying me and i cut my veins i couldn’t cut vertically so i cut near wrists, lots of blood was gushing out, and was taken to hospital. Saw my mother crying. After a bit of talking i decided not to do something like this again. Even in the hospital i was feeling like there were people outside the hospital making noises and was there to k**l me.
After meds for some time , things subsided . After a year and half, in a new job i started feeling that they were plotting to kick me out of the job and i was a burden to the company, and started getting more and more anxious.
Six months or some later on corona lockdown i started thinking another girl working with me likes me. And i started having delusions about snakes like snakes were jumping at me trying to bite me, some dreams about snakes. I started overthinking, felt things like acid dropping down skin, one time my lungs were filled with smoke, i started feeling that the owner of my company was doing black magic to k**l me because I once c*****d a joke about them. Tried proposing to the girl, there was nothing from her side, started freezing during job hours literally would spend hours in thought s incapable of completing even smallest of tasks. Did few spiritual courses lost my sleep near completely after that
Started staying up to combat the voices, the voices started talking to me instead of two people talking. Some things changed after. Started feeling too sensitive to sexual content, after awhile felt too many sensations feelings like someone coming in me, whenever i think about something sexual it felt like people gathering around talking sexual innuendos all started feeling horrible, to this day I feel like some spiritual entity is harassing me, there were a lots of things happening in between I’m sorry I sped up at last so many things were going on in mind I can’t even put them in right order or state all of the delusions or hallucinations.
Some good things too . One i was looking at my hands and I could see light on all sides with a rainbow coating. I would sometimes get the feeling some guru is showing me things, like the nervous system, healing techniques and other things. In a way i was lucky that I did not have full blown psychosis, that just by deciding or affirming most of what’s happening is just delusions i was able to mow through it. Worst happened when I was alone at corona quarantine, but I’m now hopeful and I can manage most of the voices by calling cusswords. And doctor has confirmed that with 5 years of medication hallucinations will go away.
Image credits: zymeth34212
#29
Only experienced it once after withdrawing from DNRIs (buproprion).
I kept begging to be hospitalized because I was afraid I’d hurt somebody, and I even bolted out of the car at one point. I do not remember this incident. It was relayed to me after the fact.
I only remember the emotions I felt. I don’t think I hallucinated but I was definitely out of it/delusional. I kept thinking I was gonna get better if I detransitioned and I remember considering myself filthy at the time. That’s about it.
Ironically after quitting psych meds altogether I’ve not experienced anything remotely similar since. I feel normal-ish, despite the severe depression. I can at least accurately tell which of my thoughts are legitimate and which are hogwash, and my impulse control is a million times better.
Image credits: _Moho_braccatus_
#30
I had a d**g induced psychosis around 10 years ago ( recovered since then, yay)
I think the worst ones for me were the sometimes very dark and violent thoughts. I had “visions” of brutally torturing my pets for example, and felt absolutely horrified and disgusted by even thinking anything like that.
The worst delusions were somewhat tame. For around a week I was convinced everyone around me could read my mind, so I got very paranoid about anyone noticing what I was going through.
Luckily it only lasted 2 weeks ish total. Left me with a nice panic disorder afterwards ( fully worked that one out too, yay).
Image credits: Trottel11
#31
Well as someone who is quite reasonable, and is put into unreasonable situations quite a lot.
I thought I was Hades, the god of the dead. I kinda just remember dressing in all black, and being super amped up. I came too in a psych ward with a busted up leg.
#32
It started when i was home playing some minecraft, just chilling, when i saw a spider on my hand. naturally i swiped it off as quickly as i could, but realized i didn’t even feel it on my skin, though it was gone already. i went to the bathroom to wash my face and sat on the bed to calm down. i noticed in my peripheral vision a humanoid just staring at me, but when i focused on it it disappeared. several have appeared in the same way, just going through the average day. it would happen when i’m walking, in school, at home, anywhere. when i’d go to sleep i’d hear some unintelligible whispering coming from behind me, which would come from just behind me.
after i started losing my mind over it, i told my mom, who said that i should talk to my psychologist about it, who later prescribed me some antidepressants (i forgot the name) and the hallucinations went away after a while, yippie! got off of the meds later (which i now realize was a big mistake) and they never came back.
#33
Parasites were by far my worst delusion. hallucinating worm shapes under my skin, “feeling” worms wriggling around in my brain, meticulously checking all my food. shook me up and made me feel violated + helpless medically in a way that makes other delusions pale by comparison. it’s what pushed me finally start taking antipsychotics.
#34
I actually have a ‘delusion’ where I feel like people are making fun of me or lying to me. It has SOME basis in past relationships, but it’s made me suspicious and afraid to open up to people. I guard my heart with everything I have, well, normally.
#35
Every single night, auditory hallucinations keep waking me.
Just various voices constantly saying “hello? Hello, is anyone there? Hello? >my name< can you hear me? I need your help. Hello? Could you please help me? Come outside and help me! Hello? Are you there, >my name
#36
When I was around 12 I started dealing with a lot of mental health issues. I dealt with psychosis for about a year. I would see what appeared to be a mostly faceless man in the shadows across the room when I went to bed many nights, it wasn’t sleep paralysis, I could still move, but I often would be petrified and cry myself to sleep. This was over a decade ago but definitely is a core part of my current sleep issues. There was other stuff, but nothing as interesting. I also no longer trust my own perception 100% on anything even though I’m much healthier now.
#37
I took adderall for a long time. That should explain enough.
I started ‘astral projecting’ into my own imagination and experiencing everything that happened as if I was actually there. That combined with the side effect of paranoia from the adderall basically made it so I would be literally living in my own nightmares sometimes.
Dont get me wrong, there was a LOT of cool s**t that I got to do and experience and feel, but the nightmares were BAD BAD BAD.
Imagine your imaginary friend calling you worthless, having giant maggots live inside of you while youre still alive, having rats burst out of you from inside, demons watching you staring into your eyes from an inch away just waiting.
S**t got hardcore.
#38
My worst one was that I was a prophet from God. I wrote “prophesies” and tried to spread them. All ends of the earth type stuff. I got out of it on my own though, thankfully. Didn’t really need help, just time to get over it.
#39
Since none of my hallucinations are scary, let me answer the question with the **worst** in irritation instead:
Envision this; it’s 2 am or so, you’re trying to sleep, and you hear **snoring**. I don’t live alone, my mom snores, so that makes it even worse since getting up to check if I’m now ‘**actually** hearing something’ even though I was not 5 minutes ago. Safe to say I didn’t sleep.
#40
I don’t think I’ve ever told anyone about this because I feel so much shame when I think about it. At that time I was in an extreme depression due to a burnout caused by untreated ADHD and Prolonged Grief Disorder (PGD). I was staying with acquaintances in a squat because I had to move out of my previous house due to a fight. I had my own company that was on the verge of bankruptcy. I had pushed most of my friends away. I was on a waiting list for mental health care. When I had to go out I noticed that everyone I saw had monstrous and sickly features. Faces were wrinkled with big noses and big mouths. People were dirty and ugly and breathed hard, coughed and spluttered. I stopped looking at people and only looked at the ground, but then I could still hear them. At one point I looked in the mirror and didn’t see my own face but my father’s face. My father died of a brain tumor when I was 13. My face was his pale sick face with sunken cheeks and hollow eyes. It was the most terrifying thing I have ever experienced because I thought I was now completely crazy. I became convinced that my brain was rotting away inside my head and I was beyond help. That whole period is rather hazy and I do not remember exactly how I got out of it but I eventually got help. I can also look in a mirror again but that took a while and that image is burned into my retina.
#41
When my mental health is really bad i hallucinate corpses and detached limbs in my peripheral vision. like ill think i see a hand on the floor in the subway and have to do a double take and then i see that nothings there. sometimes when im walking down the sidewalk ill see bodies up in the trees. it’s really f*****g horrible because even though i can usually double take and realize im hallucinating, it still elicits the same primal immediate panic and can take some time for me to calm down.
#42
When I moved out on my own at 17, due to an a*****e family, I heard dogs chewing on bones. In my house. I never saw the dogs, or the bones, and I wasn’t sure exactly why I knew the sound was made by dogs chewing bones, I just Knew.
I heard them in the living room & spare room. They’d always be in those two rooms, never the kitchen or my room, or the bathroom. At first they only chewed at night, and for some reason, that didn’t scare me much. It made me uneasy for sure, but I wasn’t scared.
Then I heard them during the day. They were outside during the day, and inside during the night. That was f*****g terrifying, for some reason.
I remember hearing them in the middle of the day, and looking out all the windows and not seeing them. I heard them, and there were so many, more than ever, and they were grunting and huffing and gnawing and crunching and slobbering all over these massive bones. Idk how I knew the bones were huge, I just Knew. I hid under my blankets and shook for what felt like hours, until they stopped chewing. Then, they came inside that night, and they chewed and chewed all night.
I didn’t think much of the dogs until that incident. When I couldn’t find them outside, I thought I should mention it to my doctor. He wanted me on antipsychotics, but I knew the dogs PROBABLY weren’t real, and if they were real, I’d deal with that myself, cz if they were real, then I didn’t need medication.
Somehow he let me walk out of there and go home that day, without giving me medication or putting me on a hold. I think it was because I don’t ever lie to him, he knew me for 17 years, and I knew the dogs most likely didn’t actually exist. It was weird, when the dogs were chewing I was utterly convinced they were real, to the point of texting the property manager about it, several times, but when I wasn’t hearing them, I was pretty sure they were not real. He told me to come back IMMEDIATELY if the dogs started making other noises, like barking or growling, or if I heard people instead of dogs, or if I saw them, or felt them or anything more than “just” hearing dogs chewing on bones, and I promised him I would.
Two years prior, when I was brought in for making and nearly following through with a plan to k**l myself, I was WAYYYYYY too honest with him and he sent me to an inpatient psychiatric hospital, so I think it was my crippling honesty that kept me out of the hospital when I told him about the dogs.
#43
I get auditory hallucinations a lot where I hear a dog collar jingling or people whispering at me, sometimes with peripheral shadow hallucinating.
The worst is when I’m trying to sleep and it sounds like people mumbling, as if a tv is on too loud in the next room. Once it sounded like their was a whole gala happening in my living room.
#44
Post Partum Psychosis rocked me.
Didn’t know it existed.
It dragged up some childhood trauma and flipped it so good I didn’t understand the links til years later. Was raised in a cult that had big end of the world propaganda, violent and confronting s**t that no child should be taught is a literal thing that IS going to happen. Anyway, had my son and went balls out nuts thinking the world was ending and the zombies were coming and the only way to save my kid was to ride it out on the roof or put him in foster care so the government was obliged to keep him alive.
Horrified to remember it. He was fine, he wasn’t hurt at all but I was almost dead due to not eating and having a haemorrhage too.
To this day I have to be mindful of certain things that herald a psychosis, but I never got post Partum Psychosis again. Enabled me to flag post Partum depression in a few people before anyone else realised tho.
#45
A few months after graduating HS I had not slept for a week using lots of c*nnabis plus i took over the counter cold medicine which made me delusional. I thought the tv was all a conspiracy to make me feel like a failure. Like in football all I saw was players fumbling the ball. The newspaper was all lies geared toward manipulating my feelings. Ended up in a detox facility for a week.
#46
I have schizophrenia and i experience psychotic symptoms daily. the worst delusion, fear AND annoyance wise, is probably believing im constantly being hunted down by some secret group idk of. worst hallucination fear wise is seeing figures in the hall, but the worst hallucination annoyance wise is seeing cats and dogs in areas there isnt. i live with 3 cats and 1 dog, so it becomes a real mf inconvenience even tho it doesn’t scare me 😭.
#47
This was d**g and antidepressant induced psychosis:
The scariest thing was not being able to tell if something actually happened, if I dreamed it, I hallucinated it or just imagined it. Everything just melded together until I no longer had a grip on reality.
#48
A very many years ago, I was arrogant and tried delta 8 for the first time. I took a dumb amount. Felt nothing for 3 hours and tried to go to bed.
Suddenly, it kicked in.
I went from entirely sober to fully body paralyzed, believing that my inner mind was a cell phone and I was scrolling through apps. Then it occurred to me that since I figured out the universe’s secret, THEY were after me. They were aliens, like the head person from Lilo and Stich. My husband was in on it and was not a real person. A car door slammed outside and I knew it was them. I couldn’t talk, I couldn’t move. If I made a sound, my husband would wake up and it would be over.
Then, I began throwing up while in the supine position. I started choking on my vomit and this thankfully woke my husband up. I passed out.
At some point, my husband got me into the shower, managed to clear my airway enough for me to breathe, and cleaned me up. I was unconscious but still throwing up.
He did not know what to do and was high as hell so he did what he thought he should do. Brought our TV and Xbox in the bathroom, left me in the bathtub, and played video games until I woke up at 4 pm the next day. Could not see, was fully incontinent, and needed to be carried for 2 days. Didn’t have health insurance so didn’t want to go to the ER and be shamed.
But hey, I survived.
I still cannot smoke or lay in bed with my eyes open for too long without having a moment where I’m in fear that it’ll happen again.
#49
I dealt with this through my father. He’s doing good work now and seems very healthy but he would leave my teen brother at home for a week and refuse to return home, bouncing around hotels up and down the state. Anyone with tinted windows was suspect and wanted to hurt him, he could hear angels and banish demons, etc. I love him immensely, but there have been a few episodes to deal with and when it’s psychological it can get really difficult to navigate.
Every day is a new day and a new opportunity for growth.
#50
It started because of a 2 week course of steroids and severe insomnia from about 3 or 4 days into it. I was also going through an insane amount of stressors at the time including bankruptcy, losing our house, losing my job, my husband just getting out of the ICU and being brain damaged and caring for him on my own for a year on my own 24/7. It was extremely traumatic finding him near death and what he went through in the hospital almost dying every day for 21 days.
Anyway, it started with me having a handful of pseudo seizures and I was sure I was going to die. I now know this was from PTSD. So because of the seizures I was sent for an EEG which showed focal slowing so they wanted me for a long term hospital stay to diagnose what is wrong with my brain. I was prescribed a medication for seizures that can also cause hallucinations, mania, paranoia. Didn’t know that. I was already freaking out about so many things.
I got more scared when they told me I could be treated for radiation exposure, toxic chemicals, or brain cancer. I spiraled and thought there was industrial waste in our yard and in our drinking water. It escalated to thinking we were being crop dusted with nuclear material from heavy train traffic across from our house. I started having physical symptoms where my skin was turning the brightest red and I thought we were having nuclear exposure. There had been a couple of earthquakes with an epicenter 1/4 mi from our house in the last month and I thought there could be testing underground.
The last straw was I thought my husband had been contaminated during his time in the army and was possibly transferring radiation to me through our contact. I was terrified and woke him up at 4am and I had already packed a go bag. I wanted to go to the VA hospital and have him checked out because then I’d know about me. On the way there I actually texted a friend how long she thought the government would divulge a nuclear attack on the US.
We ended up in the hospital and my husband was really pissed and uncooperative, he was also nonverbal at that point from his brain injury and there was nothing I could do to ask him to get tested. I ended up taking us to a hospital for myself and they admitted me and had a psych consult. He said all the things I went through with the insomnia, seizures, and medication were a perfect storm for what transpired in my mind. It was terrifying feeling paranoid that everything around me was poisoning me or toxic. It felt like Chernobyl was happening in my brain. I wouldn’t wish what I went through on my worst enemy.
#51
Not me personally, but I had a client for a few sessions who was having trouble sleeping at night because the moon was purple. .
#52
I developed Post partum psychosis after a traumatic birth and the nurses giving me a lot of lectures about how I had to push through problems and not think of myself. I became convinced that I was evil and ruined everyone’s lives. I heard constant crying and screaming from the baby regardless of if we were in the same room (and it was asleep) or not. I felt that I had ruined the baby’s life and there was zero possibility of anything but horrific suffering for it.
I felt a bit better if I went outside, but the sky was bright yellow and made of thin plastic. Sometimes I could be pushing the pram for hours and just staring at it. I knew cars were going to mount the footpath and k**l me. I was worried a bit for the baby in case it survived in pain, but not for me. I wasn’t upset at the idea of us _both_ dying as I knew it would be better for the child.
I knew that if I told anyone it would be me ruining their lives by being selfish and demanding more attention. And that if I told anyone they would be trapped with me, so I had to keep it all a secret to protect them until I could work out the easiest way to stop the constant screaming and remove my dangerous self. I didn’t want everyone in the world to die because of me. So I had to be quiet and plan quietly.
It turned out that Dysphoric milk ejection reflex, severe birthing injuries, PTSD and lack of sleep resulted in PPP. I had no ability to assess or get myself out of the situation, but once I switched to bottlefed and medication under medical guidance I was able to recover. Cheers to my partner and the maternal Child health nurse who worked out something was wrong, a big f**k you to multiple ‘experts’ who gave me all their opinions on my failures in ‘being a mother’.
#53
Not psychosis, but at least once or twice a month for the last 16 or so years now I’ve had spirit paralysis that has me hallucinating stuff.
It started off scary as f**k, the first time it happened I was on holiday in Africa when I was 14, I woke up in the middle of the night, couldn’t move and saw the biggest spider on the wall next to me. I thought I had been bitten but I managed to break free and the spider vanished.
Another time I hallucinated a person walking in my room, just walking about in the dark.
Another time I fell asleep with a packet of cookies next to me and I woke up in the night, couldn’t move and my hand was touching the foil of the cookies packet and burning my hand. When I woke up the burning stopped.
These days I barely hallucinate anymore as it’s become less scary and more routine. It seems you only hallucinate in a panicked state I guess. Now it’s just “oh, looks like I’m stuck, time to wiggle my finger til I can break out of it”.
#54
I spent from my early teens to early 20’s hearing malevolent voices. A combination of living in a highly verbally-a*****e environment, coupled with a total personal social-collapse away from all the friends I had at the time triggered it. Constant inspmnia, and manically being awake for 24 to 36 hours at a shot REAALLLY did not help at all.
I had the voices of family and former friends constantly howling degrading insults and personal opinions of me and my work loudly looping constantly in my head. I also had a screamer in there that showed up just at the edge of sleep.
One thing of note was that I never felt like they were real forces, I always knew my brain was playing tricks on me, but it was intensely distracting and unpleasant. People could see me arguing with my voices, watch my animated body language and occasionally hear me talking to them out loud, which is never a good look when you’re a big 6’3″. I was essentially running a*****e simulated conversations in my head and loudly jouska-jousting with imaginary versions of family and former friends.
I was very worried that it could have been schizophrenia, because it does run in my family, but I was too terrified of judgement & being incarcerated in a mental health facility to bring it up with parents because there was a running threat to have me or my brothers institutionalized if we ever showed signs of schizophrenia. It felt unsafe to show vulnerability or weakness.
I currently do not hear voices, and I attribute that to dating my wife. She made them go away.
One consequence of the experience is that I am hypersenitive to untraced voices. If I am in a room and I start hearing conversations, I have to track down what the source is. I’m OK if I can figure out that it’s a radio or TV in a different room or appartment.
#55
Type 2 bipolar disorder here, went into a mixed episode (hypomania + depression, triggered by a hangover) and I started hearing my own thoughts. There were like two voices, the one I was controlling (my actual thoughts) and another one I couldn’t stop from thinking, “jump out of the balcony! What do you think could happen? Come on, go jump! Don’t you want to?” in a hystrionic way, like a fast-talking cartoon chipmunk.
Took two Diazepam pills and went to sleep. Woke up like s**t but no extra voice.
#56
Not really the “worst” per say but the most all-consuming for sure. For the longest time I’ve had this delusion of being able to quite literally manifest things. Like, I’d think about something, and it would happen. So many “coincidences” that I convinced myself it just couldn’t be false and that I had mind powers lol. I mean like, I’d spend all my time trying to do things with said mind powers and always end up convinced that someone or something was stopping me, that the manifestation was something I “unlocked” without the someone/something knowing. It’s been slipping away the further I get from my last episode of psychosis but sometimes it’s still hard to convince myself it’s totally wrong.
Things like this still happen, I just throw out a little “ope, accidentally manifested something again” afterwards and it helps me not fixate on it like I used to. Kinda the same logic as telling my intrusive thoughts to f**k off instead of dwelling on them except it’s passive dismissal lmao. People around me always tell me I’m a good luck charm though!
#57
My worst was my kids would be better off dead than alive. Through the power of the internet I managed to talk to some woman on the opposite side of the world . She told me to take the kids to a grandparent that was safe and leave them there. So I did. I told her if I kept them nobody would be alive because my brain was telling me lies.. after that I’m not 100% sure. Prior to this I had begged for help from literally every person I knew. Including the grandmother. Nobody could help. I quote ” it was too inconvenient” . It’s been 6 years. Everyone is safe now. But I don’t speak to anyone who was too involved in their own lives, to even bother handing out a helping hand when I was drowning. F**k them . I had lost half my weight in 6 months. I was obviously sick sick. And nobody gave a d**n.
#58
I’ve been living with psychosis for awhile. When I was a teenager it was mostly giant spiders attacking me and dangerous people with glowing eyes/faces breaking into my dad’s house.
I got better for a bit and had way less episodes but after I gave birth to my first son it came back in full force. I was holding my 4 month old while going up an escalator in a big shopping center and suddenly had a hallucination that I dropped him over the side. I fully believed that I was seeing my sons bloody and crumpled up body on the floor. Apparently I was screaming so much and clutching my son who I definitely hadn’t dropped so tight that he was starting to cry. My partner had to pry him out of my arms.
Things calmed down a lot again until the other day. I was out with my family and I suddenly looked at my youngest son and kept thinking that he was something that looked like my son but wasn’t my son. I spent ages trying to tell my partner that our son has been replaced. I then saw a giant spider chasing us in my review mirror the whole time I was driving home.
My partner thinks it gets bad in times of big stress.
#59
I would say the most delusional I got certainly wasn’t the “worst” experience. It was magical, mystical even, and I suppose that was the issue. I woke up one day and thought the trees were people. It wasn’t a hallucination – I didn’t see a human person when looking at a tree. I saw a tree. But I could also sense its body, clothes, and personality. I liked elms the best, they were like regal ladies dressed in flowing leaf ball gowns. Whatever in your brain classifies things in the world as “people” vs “objects” had shifted to include trees as people. It felt like an ancient earthly secret and tbh even though I am not in active psychosis anymore I don’t quite look at trees the same some days. There will always be something more within them.
#60
I was emotionally abused by my mother for years and i guess that gave me temporary psychosis until I finally got away. I had auditory and visual hallucinations since i was 13.
I would constantly hear many feminine voices whispering at the same time and i would see figures with no features standing near me that would go away when i blinked.
When i got older (still living with my mother at that point) the figures would start looking more like people but with long limbs and a crooked smile with sharp teeth. They would stay in my line of vision and wouldn’t go away until i blinked.
The figures eventually would start moving or even posing near me, if i was preparing to go to sleep they would hang around my bed . eventually i would even see them crawling from under my bed or moving towards me but they would go away when i blinked.
I got away from my mother at 17 years old and my hallucinations completely stopped when i was 18, ive never went to a doctor to see why they stopped but i think being away from her and finally living in a place i felt safe in made them go away. I’m 23 now and do not have any hallucinations at all.
#61
I’m not giving my full medical history out like some users have but I have experienced bouts of psychotic depression w/other comorbidities. I frequently saw blurry shadow people rushing around my apartment (sort of like viewing people stood on a train platform when you’re on an express train going past), numerous auditory hallucinations inc whispering from walls and vents.
The worst was a dissociative experience that included visual effects (I felt as though I had lost my sight but could determine jagged shards of colour like stained glass in my brain) but more notably the auditory hallucination of speaking directly to Satan for approx 35 mins, which manifested as a deafeningly loud, impossibly low (near-infrasound) grinding voice which sounded like two mountains rubbing together and vibrated through my whole body. Almost indescribably frightening.
I haven’t had these experiences for more than 20 years, for which I am extremely grateful.
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