By the time I was 16, I was itching to get out of my parents’ house. I wanted freedom, independence and the opportunity to stay out past 10 p.m. without my mother threatening to call the police. I was counting down the days until my 18th birthday. And I did end up moving out shortly after, as I relocated to a completely new city for university. But I realize now that I was extremely lucky to have parents who would have never forced me out of the house if I wasn’t ready. Not everyone can say the same…

Netizens have been sharing stories of how their mothers and fathers pushed them out of the nest as soon as they became adults, so we’ve gathered some of their stories below. Many of these tales aren’t exactly uplifting reads, but they’re important reminders that having loving, supportive parents is a massive privilege.

#1

My dad married a woman who wasn’t fond of him having kids. Gold digger type. I was 16 years old at the time. They told my sister and I that they were going to move away and it was time for us to grow up. They disappeared and I didn’t talk to them for years. Recently started talking again and all is forgiven. Also, I turned out pretty well for a kid alone at 16 and I owe every bit of what I have to the teachers in highschool that took me in, paid for field trips, and never let me quit.

Edit: This has gotten a lot of attention, I appreciate all the kind words. If you grew up with great parents, please take a moment out of your day and tell them that you love them and you appreciate them.

Image credits: Donny-Thornberry

#2

I left at 19 and my parents told all 4 of us girls that once we leave, we can never come back. And they’ve stuck to it. About 12 years ago my husband and I went through a rough patch and separated. I asked if me and our two children (they were 3 mo and 3 y/o at the time) could come stay and they told me no. I ended up staying with my aunt and uncle. My husband and I eventually mended things and i went back home but yeah, my kids know they will ALWAYS have a home to come to. I don’t care if they’re 15 or 50. Our door is always open to them ❤️.

Image credits: Sweaty_Wash6550

#3

My mother had been regularly beating me up ever since I could remember. And I don’t mean a spanking. I mean with doorknobs, telephones and broken chairs. I was very close to my dad, even though he moved overseas, despite her efforts in trying to turn me against him and she didn’t appreciate it.

She kicked me out because I didn’t want to go to church. I was about 14 years old. She dragged me by my hair, threw me to the ground, put her knees on my ribs, forced her weight down on me and tried to suffocate me because I told her I wasn’t going to church because I didn’t believe in God.

Then after she convinced me to go because she beat the f**k out of me and I couldn’t win, when I got in the car and she started driving, she began taking off her rings and bracelets and I realized she wasn’t done beating me up. So I jumped out of the car, f****d myself up on the pavement, she backed up to tell me to get in the car again. I told her if she hit me one more time I would leave and she said “then leave” and drove off.

The thing is it was -32 outside. She expected me to be on her front lawn by the time she got back, but I wasn’t. Mostly because she was delusional to think that I would when I was finally free from her and obviously because even if I was that type of kid to do that, it was -32 outside. I walked to my school because it was the only place I knew to go to, but it was closed. A young couple saw me in front of the school, beat up and crying and took me to a Youth Shelter. There I found out she broke two of my ribs and my wrist was broken from throwing myself off the car. She was a court judge, so a couple of weeks later I was randomly picked up on the street coming back from school by off duty police officers. They cuffed me, put me in the back of the car and drove me to a psychiatric ward. There I found out she told people I was lying about what happened to me and I did those things to myself. She wanted to intimidate me showing that “she was the boss” and no one would believe me because she was a “good christian” and a judge.

Thankfully though, I was discharged within within 5 days, because the psychiatrists didn’t think I fit the diagnostic criteria for anything other than post traumatic stress disorder and agreed I should stay away from her. However, the social workers forced me to go to therapy because of the symptoms I was experiencing.

After that I spent most of my days afraid of walking the streets by myself because I thought she’d show up out of nowhere to beat me up. She even tried to have me arrested alleging that I tried to break into her house, when I couldn’t even take the train that was headed towards her neighborhood without having a panic attack.

Anyway, that’s what happened when she kicked me out. I haven’t spoken to her in over 10 years and don’t plan to and most importantly, do not miss her at all.

Image credits: anon

#4

Got kicked out at 19 for coming home drunk all the time. My dad said he wouldn’t support me while I destroyed myself. I hated him at the time but looking back I see how f*****g stupid I was.

Image credits: FlowSoSlow

#5

I have major depression that requires me to take medications to manage it. At the time though I was still undiagnosed and it was causing a strain on my dad’s relationship with his new girlfriend (both thought that I was just trying to get attention or something). Eventually he told me that he didn’t like me anymore and packed my belongings into a bag. The next couple years were pretty rough, in and out of the hospital because of the depression and an attempted s*****e. Tried to support myself but I couldn’t work. Ended up house sitting a Hell’s Angels grow op as a last resort to keep myself off the streets. Took a long time but eventually I managed to get enough stability that I could start building a life for myself.

Things are good now though. I put myself through university, got three degrees and now I have a career doing what I love.

Image credits: LordJac

#6

I came out of the closet to my mom(Divorced parents, had already told my dad, moved in with my mom for a few weeks to keep her company when her mother died), she didn’t like having an abomination under her roof. Suits me well, I already had an apartment waiting for me to just say yes.

Image credits: Aedrian87

#7

My mom was a hardcore alkie from the time I was…Maybe 9? To the time I was 16. She got herself shipped off to mega-rehab when I was 16 (full six months!), and during that period I bullied her sister (my then legal-guardian) to support me in emancipation proceedings. I had a feeling this was a thing I needed.

So, my mom comes back, and miracle of miracles, she stays sober. Yaaaay!

But then she starts trying to be my *mother*. Starts trying to tell me what to *do*.

Now, at this point in my life, I had been taking care of her for a long time. I had been working to mitigate her s****y life decisions, and working to keep those same decisions from ruining my f*****g life.

Having her…This f*****g alcoholic b***h that had basically made my life a living HELL for 7 years…Having her tell me I couldn’t do what I wanted…Was unacceptable.

She’s like, “You can’t stay out late on a school night!”

And I’m like, “It’s called a ‘job’. Deal. With. It.”

Yea. It didn’t take long for her to throw me out. She couldn’t handle me being independent, and though I tried to avoid playing my aces, every time she tried to throw down a maternal ultimatum, I’d come back with chapter and verse on s**t that I’d pulled her through, and she could. Not. Stand. That.

We were much better friends when we were not roomies.

Image credits: anon

#8

I secretly got my belly button pierced at 14, apparently it makes me a pr**titute..? Toxic place to live anyway.

Image credits: Demitramiky

#9

I was bi, they were Catholic.

I was also adopted, so they didn’t want my demons to infect their ‘real’ daughter.

They tried to send me back after they had her.

A week after my 17th birthday, they kicked me out when I wanted to study sciences and maths instead of the ‘proper’ things for girls, like nursery nurse etc.

Image credits: Lil-Lanata

#10

They gave me a curfew. I couldn’t be restricted. They told me “if you don’t come home by 10, then we don’t want you here” so I didn’t go home. They called me 3 days later like, “wya?” Just a stupid rebellious 16 year old.

Image credits: alexTACOpal

#11

For running away, sort of anyway, I used to live in a really small town so I had an hour bus ride to high school in a bigger town. Well, I missed a lot of school as my parents refused to drive me to school if I missed the bus. Yeah I could have gotten up earlier but I needed as much sleep as I could get, I basically raised my 5 younger siblings with a lot of help from my younger brother. That plus school and the process of having to deal with my adopted parents just sort of compounded into me grabbing my school stuff, looking my little brother in the eye and saying goodbye. I spent the next 3 hours walking to school, luckily I got picked up by an amazing lady from a nearby reserve. I got to school and everything was normal until the end of the day, my adoptive mother picked me up and dropped me off at the local police station. Told the officers I abused her and took advantage of the relationship and some other b******t. The cop was heartbroken by this situation, I could tell. He dropped me off an hour away in a much bigger cities drop-in center for homeless teenagers and such. I hate telling this story because it sounds so incredibly sad, and it was, but fear not anyone who actually read this far. Lucky for me a teacher who taught at the high school i went to was a foster parent and offered to take me in temporarily until I got back on my feet. Well, that’s my mom now and I can’t imagine life with out her guidance and wisdom. Life is fricken weird, yo.

Image credits: HaramBe4any1else

#12

Well I wasn’t quite a kid. But a couple months after I graduated high school, despite having epilepsy, I thought it was a good idea to try shrooms. Long story short, ended up in the hospital having seizures. I was then kicked out and lived in my car for a couple months before some friends took me in. Took me 6 months and 5 different people letting me couch hop or stay with them to get on my feet and get my life going. In hindsight I guess getting kicked out forced me to grow up.

Image credits: BEND_OVER_NO_LUBE

#13

I was kicked out at 16 for getting a girl pregnant. Way to go mom. Leave me high and dry in the most needy moment of my life.

But I overcame and emerged a better person for it.

Image credits: anon

#14

I was kicked out of home so many times from the ages of about 14 onwards. My mother was a narcissist and I believe she honestly enjoyed seeing me in pain. She also enjoyed playing the whole “oh no my daughter has run away again” card even though I never ran away.
I was crashing at a friend’s house while in the middle of my high school certificate and she went to our principal and cried saying that I ran away and she felt helpless! But in reality, she kicked me out for no reason and I still have no idea why.
I wasn’t a bad kid. I had depression etc, but that was due to the abuse I went through. I was always terrified of what she would do next.
When I had my son at 19, she also kicked us out in the middle of winter with no where to go and I was stuck at a bus stop freezing with a baby. We hadn’t even had a fight or anything. She just randomly decided I need to get out.
She was just a cruel person and doesn’t deserve to be called my “mum”.
She did tonnes of cruel things over the years…I could go on and on but I won’t. She is no longer in my life now though…it’s better that way.

Image credits: InternalNinja

#15

My mother was a narcissist; I had a lot of health problems that were taking attention off of her. She told me one day that I was causing more problems than I was solving and I had a week to get out of her house or k**l myself.

She made sure to tell me that she would prefer it if I left because if I killed myself she couldn’t collect on my life insurance policies.

Image credits: alchemicals

#16

Right before I turned fifteen I started dating this boy, we’ll call him Dale. Of course I thought Dale was my soulmate. I spent all of my time with him, wanted to marry him, made plans with him. Of all things, Mom decided that our relationship had become toxic when I announced, about 1.5 years into my relationship with Dale, that I didn’t want to go to college and be an artist anymore, I wanted to go to a community college instead and become a nurse, like Dale’s mom… Mom forbid me from seeing him any more. So what did I do? What any teenager would do, I started sneaking out of the house to see Dale in the middle of the night. I’d tell her I was going out with friends but I was really just seeing Dale. She knew. I came home one day and there were trashbags on the coffee table and she told me to pack up my things and go be with Dale, since I was picking him over her. It felt silly to me that she’d made it a “Her vs. Dale” thing, when it really was just young love.
My relationship with her suffered indefinitely for that. The interesting thing is, I did what pleased her eventually and went to a four-year college to get a fine arts degree… And a few years after obtaining that I didn’t want to die poor so I went to a community college to get my nursing degree. I really just wasted time and money. Thanks Mom. Dale is happily married with four kids. I’m divorced with one. I don’t think Dale was my soul mate anymore, but I wonder what might have happened if Mom didn’t get a stick up her a*s.

Image credits: noopibean

#17

Didn’t get on with my Dad. Left with a black eye and went to catch bus to my boyfriend’s. I was 16. Mum came to bus stop and gave me alift to the restaurant my (then) bf worked at. She said their marriage would end if I stayed so I said ‘Then I’ll leave’ and I did.

Get on very well with my Mum now, always have. Dad has taken time and is still not quite how we’d all want it BUT a lot better than I ever thought and a lot better experience than many have.

Image credits: sunglower

#18

Lol I lied about something like a test score or something, then my mom made me write and sign a contract that went along the lines of “I promise I won’t lie to my mom or I will have to leave the house.” She caught me in a lie, pulled out the contract, so I went to my friends house. I was like 9, contracts you sign at that age aren’t valid smh.

Image credits: GummyBearFighter

#19

It happened quite a few times. My mother cared more about her relationship with her second husband and their daughter that it was always my fault when anything happened in the house. The one that really sticks out to me is when I was already doing my own thing, about to wash my laundry, and thr laundry equipment was in the basement. My stepdad tried to push me down the stairs. So I dropped.my laundry basket in the kitchen and watched it go down the stairs. He tried to.push me again when I didn’t fall. I was 14, 5’5″ and 200 pounds of anger and hate for this man who’s spent 7 of my 14 years abusing me I’m every way he could. So I let the rage out and grabbed a 10″ Wusthof.chef’s knife off the fridge and was about 10 seconds away from a self defensive.murder when my mother walks into the kitchen, just getting home from work. She then screams at me and tell me to get out. So I went to stay with my dad, who just didn’t really want to spend time with his kids, especially the one from the failed first marriage. So I stayed with his parents for a few weeks.

Same stepdad, at 16, made.me wash all the dishes from the week. Then rewash them again because they didn’t suit him. So I did. At this point I’ve been washing dishes for 3 hours, it’s an hour past my “bed time” and he then throws them on the floor and says they still don’t suit him. Tells me to wash them again, I said, “if you don’t like the way they’re done do it yourself.” That got me a 12 inch Calphalon non-stick skillet smacked into my head. That’s when my mom finally arrived home from her college classes to hear.me screaming about how I should have killed myself years ago because obviously no one wants me around. That didn’t exactly get.me kicked out. It got me 3 times a week anger management for a few months. The psychologists never thought I had an anger problem or anything of the sort. I was pretty obviously dealing with depression.

F**k “family.” The ties that bind us are love and respect, not blood and genetics.

Image credits: Abadatha

#20

My mother was on d***s, and we’d either move from man to man as she slept with them for room and board and d***s, or they’d come in and sleep with her for money and d***s.

I did not like one of them, or how he looked at my sister.

We butted heads and it was clear that she liked him more than she did us. So I swung at him one day and got booted on my a*s with the clothes on my back and nothing else. I was 13. Luckily I could move in with my dad, and I was there until 18, joined the Navy, broke my ankle and separated, met a Navy vet who helped me get into college and turn my life around. I’m 28 now and still in college, but I couldn’t get aid until 25 outside of him spotting me for a semester if I did paperwork for him on my weekends when I wasn’t working while he was building his business.

Image credits: QaraKha

#21

I’ve been kicked out multiple times from my house. First time I was 15, my mom was angry as I was like every other teenager “lazy” and not doing anything with my life other than school. She kicked me out and told me not to come back until I found a job. Literally had nothing but the clothes I had on that day walked almost 6 miles to my friends house crashed there for about two weeks. Until she called me telling me to come back home, fast forward to 17 she started making me pay bills after having a job, and then complain that I was always out and never home. My days were 7-2:45 in school mon-Friday and Thursday-Sunday 1:30-10-11:30 depending working at a restaurant. And my days off when I wasn’t working I was at my now wife house or relaxing in my bed . Got kicked out for a week stayed with my dad, she called my dad and convinced him to get me to go back. About a month later got kicked out again for the same thing. Fast forward to a year later now 18 we got into this big argument about her wanting me to pay 1,000 in rent as I got a “decent” sales job after graduating high school was making 550 every two weeks I told her with my paying the cellphone bill electricity and my insurance and my gas and my food that leaves me with roughly 400 for me to save or spend on myself she slapped me saying I was being disrespectful, got fed up packed my car with all my s**t, stayed with my friend for three months and pulled the trigger and moved 7 states away for a job opportunity. I’ve been on my own ever since now 23. Looking back I think it had to do a lot with the divorce of my father and what he had done to her and me looking exactly like him didn’t help. But it’s made me into a adult real quick and I haven’t been able to live a normal “careless” teenager life it sucks but I guess it is what it is.

#22

Didn’t get kicked “out” of the house, my father moved out. Tldr at the end

I was about 19 or 20 years old when it happened, 2 or 4 semesters into college. Dad was having a lot of trouble keeping a job. Around that time he had a major career shift, went to culinary school, and hated every restaurant position he found. With no income coming in I luckily found a job at a small diner nearby the campus (I had to walk everywhere since I had no vehicle or drivers license). He refused to allow me to help pay bills, too proud. My mother lived in the next state over about 350 miles away, living almost equally as broke. So she couldn’t help even if he’d allow it. His turn-around between jobs grew shorter and shorter. He became more depressed, barely left the apartment, we barely had anything to eat. Twas bad, mkay.

A little after Christmas his sister-in-law, my aunt, found him a small job in the town they live in, in another state, with his parents, my grandparents. He would be moving there and start his new job in 4 months time. 550 miles away. Never once ran it by me before making his decision. Didn’t ask if I could move with him (which was going to be a “no” anyway because I was still in college on state scholarships). Didn’t help in the slightest with preparing me for living on my own. Didn’t help find a better job to afford living on my own. No one in the family asked for my opinion, or offered to help me financially or emotionally at all during the process. Our family did everything they could to make sure he could get back on his feet. While I got a check for 25$ which each Catholic Christmas card they sent.

It’s been 5 years and I thank my lucky stars I made it out alive. Got a good job, a decent apartment, a college degree, and a bamboo plant.

Tldr; Father couldn’t keep a job due to mid-life crisis, family helped find him a job 550 miles away leaving me stranded.

#23

I had dirty laundry in my room. Not even old dirty laundry, it was “new.” My dad called me screaming and told me “if you want to be dirty then go and live with your boyfriend” so I did. Then he got mad at me because I left.

#24

I was an absolute nightmare to raise. I fought my parents on everything, and broke every rule they gave me. When I turned 16 they emancipated me and told me to leave.

I found a couple other’s my age that were emancipated and stayed with one of them for about a month. Eventually I moved in with my girlfriend, who I married when I turned 18. We got divorced 5 years later.

I get along decently with both my parents (who divorced shortly after tossing me out) and am now remarried. I made a c**p-load of mistakes, and brought it all on myself. But I do think I’m a better person now because of those lessons than I would have been staying with them. Eventually I would have done something big and ended up behind bars.

#25

My dad was convinced all of my teachers / school officials were out to get me and ruin my life in particular so he signed me out of school after my junior year. Told me I was either going to take my GED test and go to the college he wanted, take the classes he wanted for the major he wanted, or I was, quote unquote, dead to him. I decided I wanted to go to school and graduate with my friends, so I ratted him out to my mom (who’d also kicked me out previously for being unhappy with her constantly misgendering me, but that’s a diff long story) and she enrolled me back in. When he found out he cut me off and took me off my antidepressants. Suddenly, getting up in the morning and going to school was a lot f*****g harder, so he took that as him being right and kept ranting at me about what an idiot I was and how I was a lazy failure who’d never get anywhere. Once I finished high school I told him to f**k himself and out the door I went c:.

#26

All of my sisters were “kicked out or decided to leave before the age of 18”. Physical fighting that was provoked and started by my drunken step mom. I left at 16 due to her.

Reasons that caused one of my sisters to get kicked out: Smoking weed, drinking, fighting, and throwing parties. (Even though my stepmothers son definitely did worse).

Do they regret it? Well they are alone now and don’t have family to come visit them. They are still self centered drunks. I think in their old age they will realize what amazing opportunity they had to build a close knit family and absolutely failed due to their alcohol issues and inability to bond with others due to consistently working on themselves rather than the family as a whole. It’s kind of sad when you have 5 children and no one wants to come visit you.

As for me, I cut them off. They are the toxic ones. (Example: Not even calling or coming to see me on my Nursing graduation day and when I brought it up they said “Well its just a milestone not a Bachelors degree”

#27

I asked to stay at my best friend’s house. I was 25 years old….. We ended up going back to my parents house to get my overnight stuff (meds, extend bar, clothes) & my mom blew up at us to the point that my friend excused herself, called her mom, who then called the cops, & by the time the cops got to my parents house, my mom had stopped screaming at us & we left. The next day I got a snotty text from my stepdad that I “chose to leave & made a big mistake”. Fast forward to the next day, & my mom wanted my i.d. card, house key & cell phone back & was telling my bf that if I ever came back there’d be even more rules, to which he replied with “how can there be more rules? You already don’t allow her to do anything?”.

#28

My mom hit me, like she’d done before when extremely frustrated with me, she is very tiny especially at that point I had probably 60 pounds on her than, I used to just let her hit me & ignore it because this pissed her off more knowing she couldn’t hurt me. I got really angry & finally hit her back, I spit in her face first, I was an awful teenager so she kicked me out. It lasted about two weeks, the only time I ever hit her. I did apologize but she still to this day either doesn’t want to admit or can’t remember hitting me first when your emotions are high like that sometimes you can’t remember I don’t blame her, I still wished I’d shown more restraint but she never hit me again after that.

Funny story I remember her charging me unexpected and rather fast with a rubber boots & hitting me with it in the face on the shoulder all over. Once I realized what was happening I laughed in her face, still makes me laugh.

She didn’t beat me, because she didn’t have enough strength to, often I’d be being a sassy teenager in the car she’d slap me in the lips and go right back to driving like it didn’t happen. She busted my lips open quite a few times, & I remember her hitting me with a broom taking it from her while she tried, and I remember the time she just kept slapping and slapping me, never hit me with a closed fist, & it wasn’t an all the time thing just when I was unbearable.

#29

I lied about graduating high school, walked with my class, missed a voicemail about summer school and my mom found out. She gave me 10 days to get out. Was the best thing that ever happened to me. Pushed me to survive and I’m so much better for it! We have an amazing relationship now!

#30

I tried to come out as gay at a very early age, I think around 13. My parents were Catholics, my mom an alcoholic and my dad had a problem abusing painkillers. The emotional and physical abuse lasted until they kicked me out at around 16.
I couch surfed at friends while I could, ultimately ended up putting me in a situation where I was hitch-hiking and living with strangers to stay off the streets. It was bad. It still is. Kicking me out didn’t make me less gay.

#31

(Almost) straight A student. Lots of friends. Always did my chores. Dad was (is) and alcoholic, not so much that he would drink all the time, but when he would drink he got drunk. Well I was taking a couple ap classes. In one of them I had a 72 (still an A because of the curve, of which I was on the higher end). Got a 69 on a test, which brought my grade down do a 69 (still an A at this point). However the problem is that it doesn’t show that curve until the end of the semester, so according to the online grading message service my dad had, I had an f in the class. Tried explaining the curve to him over dinner, when he was drunk, and it ended up with him kicking me out.

I’m doing great now, but that’s because I worked hard and made smart decisions afterwards. Moral of the story is, don’t jump to conclusions and listen to your kids.

#32

I got kicked out because I was engaged to marry this girl. I managed to find a job, rent a house and get everything almost sorted. The only issue was I was due my dad £1200 or so.

My fiancé was living with her parents (we were all very religious back then) and her parents were going to move house. To save her moving twice she was going to move in first and she had this idea of getting it all ready etc.

I went to talk to my dad about repaying the money he lent me. I had worked out my budget and how much each month I could repay him.

He refused and demanded the money in full upfront, said I already had another house. Why should I stay and use up the food he buys etc and then proceeded to kick me out. (I forgot that week he had been getting more and more strict where I hadn’t even had my first wage slip and I had to make my own bread and stuff just to eat because he would refuse to feed me. I’ve gone to bed without food many times but I think that hit the worst)

We made up now and I’ve repaid him the money. All it took was just some compassion and realistic view of how we did things. (Religious views were such a nightmare to live up to which didn’t help matters. My fiancé had to move twice and she had to wait till the wedding night before she could stay).

#33

I had an ex who would steal from my parents behind my back. My parents finally called her out on it and i defended her to no end. My parents thought i was lying to them and kicked me out and i havent seen them since. Me and her broke up a month after when i caught her stealing from me.

#34

My parents divorced when I was 8 and my ‘mother’ made my life hell from about the age of 11 onwards. She would put me down and insult my appearance, my looks and my weight, I ended up with an eating disorder for a couple of years and still now, I’m really particular about what I eat and train regularly. My dad moved about 80 miles away for work after she wrecked him in the divorce and she’d taunt about how he doesn’t care and he upped and left me, but she’d make it really difficult for him to see me and wouldn’t let him take me on holiday or stay over his. She was incredibly manipulative and would force me to do things, i.e. go to the shop at night to get something she wanted, or she’d have a tantrum and tell me to leave. It got to the point where I started working nights at 18 to avoid her and slept most of the day, but she’d still pick fights when I got up for work. I can’t even remember what the last fight started over, but she screamed at me about how she wished I’d never been born, how much of a loser I was etc etc and to get the hell out of her house. So I did. I slept in my car for a few weeks, showered at the gym and worked lots while waiting for my flat to be ready and I moved out. We didn’t speak for 3 years after.

#35

My kids are always welcome in my home, no matter how old they become!!

#36

My parents were a******s, that’s really about all there was too it.

#37

Most of us don’t 🤷🏼‍♀️. My 20 and 18 year old sons live at home still, and likely will through college, and potentially longer based on the job and housing market. The same was true for both myself and my partner when we were younger. I didn’t move out of my childhood house until I moved in with my husband actually.

#38

My family is from Argentina, I was born in the United States. I lived CA and FL and both places I had friends growing up that were charged rent or kicked out because they didn’t want to pay rent. I’ll get downvoted for this but I’m talking strictly from observational experience, it was only my white friends whose parents were charging them rent.

When I moved out because I wanted to my mom cried, in Argentina it’s common to only move out when you are ready to have a family of your own.

I don’t understand how parents can charge their kids rent. It’s one thing if it’s a small amount to teach them financial responsibility but I’m not talking about that. In my theory I think it’s financially motivated because mom and dad got too comfortable with the credit card, racked up debt and want to justify shaking their kid down for money.

#39

Most people don’t. There is the expectation that kids start working on becoming independant at 18/get a job but most people don’t literally say “well you’re 18, get out!”

In fact most people turn 18 while still in high school.

EDIT: And something just occured to me. What’s actually funny is that when parents do keep helping out/supporting their kids other people s**t on them for generational wealth lol.

#40

I served with two guys who were kicked out at 18. One turned 18 3 months before graduating high school and was kicked out. He lived with his aunt till he left for the military. Another left to the military at 17 and turned 18 while serving. Both never returned home turning their time in the military. They have only gone back 2 and 3 times since, and this was 24 years ago. They hate their parents and don’t let their kids anywhere near them.

#41

62% of recent high school kids are enrolled in college, so their version of being ‘kicked out’ is really just going to school but coming back home for summers. This % varies by state a lot. 2% head off the military. It may be that the rest of the parent see this as kids leaving the house and if the kid has chosen not to go to college or the military, they too should plan on leaving the house. Some kids can’t wait to get out of the house. In the end, the % actually kicked out of the house may be very small.

#42

Recently saw something that said the origin of this stems from forcing people to make money and spend money as soon as possible (rent, get a job, bills, have kids) and that made me think a little differently about it.

#43

The vast majority of American parents don’t kick their kids out when they turn 18. The ones who do are either bad parents, or they have bad kids. Most parents help their kids to become independent. Most kids move out when they think they’re ready.

#44

The same culture that does this sends their parents to nursing homes.

#45

My 33yo son is still at home. WFH and is saving up to buy a van to travel. He pays us nothing, but when I got out of the hospital, he waited on me like a champ.

#46

It’s actually not very common. My daughter is 21 and all her friends who aren’t still in college live at home. She is the only one with her own place. In my experience the vast majority of kids who get kicked out at 18 are the ones that are out of control or disrespect their parents. And in those cases I agree to show them the door.

#47

Birthgiver was a narcissistic c**t

16 years old, decided to buy a house 2 hours out of the city, basically said we’re moving out in 2 weeks and there’s no room for you.

#48

Had severe anorexia that my proud parents were too embarrassed to get me treatment for. When it looked like I might die, my mom told me to leave. I was like 30kg at 166cm, 18 years old.

I’m better now and we actually have a good relationship.

#49

I had a rebellious streak and didn’t want to finish high school.

#50

I was 19 studying at the uni with a schollarship, my dad is an abussive rich man that likes to tell me whenever he can how much money he is spending on me, he was never home and worked from about 8am to 9 pm every day so i didnt really see him that much. i started smoking weed regularly at like 17 he knew about that and even took me to a bong shop in SF and let me buy a really expensive bong that he took in his suitcase all the way back to chile where we live (he never saw me smoking weed but we had talked about it). A year goes by and all of the sudden he gets fired for staff reduction and looses his 100k+ anual job and begins to spend all day in the house b******g about every single thing he tought was wrong, you left some crumbles on the kitchet table f**k you im going to yell at you till 2 am for not cleaning every single spec of dust. So my life in that house became hell i didnt want to be there and sunk in a deep depression, i was out all week to avoid seeing him and getting high all day with my friends because i didnt kwon what else to do with my life. One day i invited a friend to stay over at my house wich my dad hated because why where they sleeping in his house if they had their own, and stupidly we sparked a joint at like 3 am, and in the first couple of hits he gets up to i assume get a glass of water when he smells it and enters my room yelling kicks my friend out of the house (cars are not common on teenagers here and he was about 2 hours on bus from his house) and proceeds to yell every kind of insult to me for wasting his money on weed and how bad of a son i was when in reality the half of the money he gave me i spent on transportation and the rest on food every other day because i couldnt afford to buy lunch for myself every day of the week (had good friends that always gifted me weed) he told me to get out of his house that exact moment and i had to figh with him to get my stuff.

I lived on some friends houses for a couple of months until my brother (who was kicked out of the house a couple years earlier) and i were able to afford a place to live. Half a year later thing start to go bad with my brother and i start to see tons of behaviors that my dad had like talking as they knew every single thing in the world and i was a piece of s**t. He ended up throwing me out of my own place kept half of my belongings and made me fail the finals because of that.
I ended up moving with my gf who i met when i was kicked out and we got a place toguether, i am now finishing my studies and feel better than ever and i finally can be relaxed at my house.

#51

When I was 15 my best friend at the time was “trouble” as my mother put it. She turned up at our door in tears one night, her a*****e step dad had kicked her out and she had nowhere to go, she had walked about 5 miles in the freezing cold and pitch black to get to my house. My mother said no. I was absolutely shocked! I couldn’t believe she would leave a young girl out on the street like that. I couldn’t face leaving her alone so I said I would go with her and find her somewhere to stay. My Mum said “if you walk out now don’t bother coming back”. I went, she took my key and my bags were packed and on the doorstep the next morning. We were homeless together, sofa surfing and staying in hostels for over a month, I was still attending school as much as I could but it was really f*****g hard. We’re on better terms now but I still haven’t really gotten over it. I have a child now and I can’t imagine ever doing that.
Obviously my side is a little biased, may I add for context that I was an absolute little s**t!

#52

At 14 my mother accused me of being a Satanist, to which I told her I was not, but rather an Atheist, and had been for 2 years. She responded by telling me to get out of her house. I was couch surfing for about 2 months at friends houses before my dad got in touch with me and told me he was going to call the cops if I didn’t come home.

Weird times, man. I’m about to be 27, so she’s at least accepting of it now. I guess when she realized it wasn’t a rebellious teenager thing but a legitimate change in my beliefs I guess she let it go.

#53

My parents are Jehovah’s Witnesses and found out I had a girlfriend that wasn’t in the cult and that’s a huge deal to them. I got kicked out at the very beginning of my senior year of high school at 17 years old. It all happened at the perfect time actually because they weren’t going to let me go to college, but now I am. I’m an engineering student at Penn State these days!

#54

My mother has severe mental illness and PTSD from her time in the military. Living with her was excruciatingly hard on me as a child/teen. My parents had divorced early on and I still had a relationship with my father who had remarried and had another child.
My father moved back into the area where me and my mother were living and offered me a chance of escape. He had bought a house and said to come live with him and I jumped at the chance.
Unfortunately my father was still in the military and he was often gone into the green zone in Baghdad, which left me alone with my stepmother and 10yrs younger than me sister.

My stepmother has severe mental illness (probably bipolar and severe OCD but was never diagnosed) she thought because I had grown up so leniently with my mother that I should have more structure. Structure to her was pretty much me being on house arrest 24/7. I was constantly in trouble for ridiculous things, I was never allowed to go out and my social life was destroyed which is devastating to a teenager, my computer time was severely limited (this was 2007-2009) to her I could never do anything right and was constantly berated. Since my father was gone all the time I was at the mercy of my two maternal figures who were both ill and hated each other. My life was a living hell for so long that I had a breakdown in Oct 2009. I was 17 and I called my mother in hysterics saying that I couldn’t take living with my stepmother anymore and I didn’t know why to do and I was losing my mind.
My mother was understandably upset and she said she was going to write my father an email (he is sill in Baghdad at this point)
I told my mother “if you send that email, something bad is going to happen to me”

She sent it anyway. The next day at school I went to my guidance counselor and told her that I was afraid to go home. She told me that since I felt like I wasn’t in any physical danger there was nothing she could do for me.
In disbelief and absolutely terrified, I went home.
Sitting at the kitchen table was my stepmother and the printed out email that my mother had sent to my father. She demanded that I read it and I said no.
She told me to pack my s**t and get out.

I took a bunch of garbage bags and threw as much of my possessions into them as I possibly could and waited for my mother on the curbside. It was already dark and I was shaking with cold and adrenaline.

#55

I almost got kicked out so idk if this counts. It was summer time and the night ended up being pretty cool. I had opened my window because it was stuffy in the house. My parents kept the AC on 72 and it must have been like 68 outside so if anything I thought it would help.

My older sister who I constantly fought with noticed it was open and called my parents who were on a week long vacation in Mexico. Long story short it ended in a huge emotional screaming mess where they told me over and over to leave the house. I never had a good relationship with them, I knew they ment it. But they weren’t here so what were they gonna do? Throw me out? The fight lasted a few hours, ruined their vacation, but I refused to leave. Knew if I did I would probably never see or talk to them again bc I would never come back. But I didn’t want to leave my cat.

They came back from vacation and didn’t bring it up. They actually didn’t talk to me for like a month. It was like I was invisible which is what I wanted.

We have a better relationship now however. I ended up just moving out like two months after that happened so I think it honestly helped a lot.

#56

Was getting into fights every single day at school, I mean every single day. Was just SUPER angry. I never had a real problem until the Vice Principle decided he didn’t like my hair cut and decided to come after me for literally anything every single day for about 3 years (no exaggeration). I got suspended A LOT, and my grades started slipping because of it. I ended up hating authority, which gradually turned into me hating everybody, that’s when the fighting started.

The situation with the VP got physical once, him not me. Probably the only reason I didn’t get expelled is because he assaulted me, I screamed at him very publicly in the hall where everyone’s lockers were “touch me again and I’ll f**k you up old man”. Found out years later that freaked a lot of kids out. The actual principle started letting me get away with murder after that though, probably so they didn’t get sued.

The anger from all this started bleeding into my home life. I kept seeing my parents as these authority figures that I had so much disdain for. Mum and Dad began fighting and it felt like like they were blaming their problems on me (honestly probably was my fault). One time my dad straight told me it was my fault that him and my mum were going to get divorced. I hit him, he hit me, I flipped a table and smashed everything, they called the cops and then got kicked out when I was 16.

Was gone about a year and a half before we made up, came back kinda intermittently for a few days every few months.

I have the BEST relationship with my parents now though, they never split up, I think we all just needed a break from each other, I also got expelled around that time and as soon as I was out of that f*****g concentration camp of a school (literally after I left, the VP got his official title changed to “Head Of Discipline”, not a joke) and went to a new one I started doing really well again. I ended up getting accepted into university a year before I finished high school somehow. My mum has spoken to me about hearing stories off other parents of what was happening to me at school getting bullied by the VP and has become very understanding of why I was the way I was, I never told anyone at the time. I still have huuuuge problems with authority, mainly when I don’t think people have earned it. I work by my self now and plan on opening up a business with my partner soon so I never have to deal with s**t like that ever again, hopefully.

Anyway, Life’s good now.

#57

My mom said I’m welcome home anytime or free to leave. Whatever i do, she’ll support me. She’s an immigrant as well and thinks americans are a*s backward for kicking kids out at 18. Says, “That’s why they end up dying alone in retirement homes.”.

#58

They don’t, it’s very uncommon. I moved out at 20 just because I could but I could have moved back home anytime I wanted. Hell I’m 40 and I could call my mom and move back in with my wife and kids tonight if I asked. It’s not the way it used to be where you were married with 3 kids and 5 years into your career by 25. More people live with their parents at 30 than move out at 18.

#59

Capitalism doesn’t like mutual aid. The destruction of extended multi-generational families/clans was by design. Just like the suburbs.

#60

I think it was more common when the economy was better and the housing vs. earnings imbalance wasn’t so bad. Also, I think it’s more common in White European households than POC and immigrant families who tend to be more closely knit. In my WASP family, after high school you were expected to either go to college or else get a full-time job and support yourself–either way, you were out. That isn’t affordable anymore however.

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