Friendship is sacred. You should feel safe being your authentic self around your friends, and you should never have to worry about being judged. Sure, they might tell you some hard truths that are painful to hear from time to time, but it should always come from a place of love and respect.

Unfortunately, not everyone understands how to be in a healthy, supportive relationship. And it can be incredibly painful to realize that one of your closest loved ones would take any opportunity to stab you in the back. Redditors have been recalling moments when they learned that a close “friend” didn’t actually care about them at all, so we’ve gathered their most heartbreaking stories below. These might not be easy to read through, but we hope that they’re reminders that you deserve so much more in your own friendships.

#1

When he complained and got a server at Texas Roadhouse “fired” over a $2 shortage… And was laughing and bragging about it. Like, it made him feel good / important that he cost someone their job.

As a side note, we are no longer friends and, about 2 weeks later, we (me, my wife, and daughter) had the same server at the same Texas Roadhouse.

crogers2009:

As a former restaurant manager, I can say that the majority of the time we’ll tell the customer that we will “reprimand” the employee, and we’ll just go in the back and laugh about it, if it wasn’t something too serious.

GPLeChuck00:

My old boss (construction supply delivery company) used to agree completely with the customers, “Oh yeah. He’s just dumb. I’ll fire him when he gets back.” Most of the time we never even heard about it unless he wanted to laugh about how stupid they were. Even if it was serious.

Image credits: Emcee_Such_N_Such

#2

When I finally realised that if she was b******g about other people to me, she was most likely b******g about me to them. It took me a surprisingly long time to figure this one out.

ian9921:

This is why I have anxiety. A lot of my friends bitch about their other friends to me.

dragonfly-1001 (OP):

Take note of how the other friends treat you. If they are cautious & look at you as though they are judging, then you can bet your bottom dollar that you are being spoken about.
Next time you are on the receiving end of a b**ch session, I would casually make a comment along the lines of “I hope you don’t b**ch about me like this” and take note of the response.
Or you can do what I did and tell the other friends what is being said about them. It started an avalanche of discussion about what she was telling everyone about everyone and it was at that point we realised that our middle friend was an outright [jerk].

ItsTtreasonThen:

It’s also good to note there is a difference between venting and trashing. Like, some friends can be great but you if had a friction point you might just need to vent and figure out how to address it. But if it’s never about fixing it, or growing your understandings… Then it’s probably more about trashing.

dragonfly-1001 (OP):

Absolutely there is a difference. Nobody is perfect & it is natural that your talking points are about common people you know. However, my so called friend was bitching on purpose to cause problems. She purposely wanted to keep us all seperate so she would be the central contact between us all. There was a constant feeling of unease when we were together as a group. We all had an edge of arrogance about us because we knew something nasty about the others. It was uncomfortable. She lost her s**t once she realised that we were talking to each other without her present to control the narrative.

Image credits: dragonfly-1001

#3

When he propositioned my girlfriend to have s*x with him under the guise of making sure she was being faithful to me.

Anon:

So if she accepts, he gets free s*x. If she rejects, he’s the “hero” for testing her virtue.
Brilliant plan. What could possibly go wrong?

Shixhat:

Punch.

Image credits: Mychalstevens

If you’ve had the same best friend since you were in kindergarten, you probably know that person better than their own family does. Favorite ice cream flavor? Strawberry cheesecake. Favorite holiday? Halloween. Biggest fear? Heights. At this point, your relationship feels so natural that you never have to think about what to say or worry about how to behave around them.

But have you ever stopped to consider what actually makes a good friend? According to BetterUp, there are some key characteristics that any great friend should have. First, they should be someone with integrity who stands up for their values. It’s also crucial for a good friend to be trustworthy and honest. 

#4

He tried to abduct a lost, drunk woman from a bar.

We were getting ready to leave a crowded bar one night and my friend went to use the restroom. When he came back he was supporting a woman who was so drunk she could barely walk. He said that she had lost her friends and we should take her back to our hotel room.

I told him that we should help her find her friends and asked her for her name. My friend looked pissed and said that we should just go. She managed to slur that her name was Amy. I then went to the DJ and asked him to announce to the bar that Amy had lost her friends, needed their help, and to come find her at the bar.

During this my friend tried to walk Amy out of the bar, but security stopped him at the door. Luckily Amy’s fiends immediately came to the bar to get her and got her away from my friend.

Afterwards my friend was pissed, because “I had ruined his good time.” I told him that he was disgusting, that taking that girl back to our hotel would have been abduction, and that what he had tried to do made him no better than a r*pist.

I stopped hanging out with him after that.

kazuwacky:

Power to you for getting that girl back to her friends.
I got drunk around a male friend and he took me back to his flat instead of mine. He tried stuff and got sulky when I drunkenly said no. I’m sure he thinks he’s a good guy for that… Somehow.
I never spent a second alone with him again, never went anywhere with him again. I viewed it as a frightening betrayal that I didn’t expect.

Image credits: dring157

#5

Everytime he broke up with a girl he would go on and on about how crazy she was. Everytime he got a new gf he would force every member of the friend group to be friends with her, which was really awkward because we knew how the story would end. Didn’t help that he had a history of cheating.

He also liked to talk about who ever wasn’t in the room. Once he started getting passive aggressive with my wife I blew up at him. Now he’s got a girl he barely knows pregnant and they’re both unemployed. F**k em.

EnsignMJS:

Did you remain friends with his ex-girlfriends?

Humanaut93 (OP):

My wife kept in touch with one, there were a few though. There was a really bad blow up with one girl, we’ll call her “A” who he was with for like 5 years.
A lived about 3 hours away and he wasn’t even a little subtle about his infidelity. My wife (gf at the time) always said if she asks I’m telling her, because he would bring multiple girls around when A was at home. After one of his mistresses spilled the beans my wife confirmed it to A when she broke down. They still didn’t break up but he wouldn’t talk to my wife for like 2 years after. In that time he moved in with A 3 hours away, then got ratted out by his neighbors and had to move back here.
The night he came back was so weird, he called me up to meet him at a gas station and a bunch of our friends were there and the girl he cheated with too. One day he said to my wife “I forgive you” and she was to polite to say “I’m not sorry” he put me in a lot of s**tty situations and I don’t regret one bit not talking to him, I just hate to think of the lies he’s spreading about me.

Image credits: Humanaut93

#6

I began to notice that he’d get really quiet whenever something good happened to me. He was pouting.

He pouted when I got a new girlfriend. When I got a good job. Even if I had a small pleasure like buying an album that I liked. He’d get a hurt look on his face and barely talk.

I never understood how he could think of me as a friend and absolutely hate for me to have any happiness at the same time.

Oberon_Swanson:

Try thinking of your friend’s success as your success. Being part of a more successful social circle has its benefits, right? If they get a promotion, your “I know a guy who might be able to help with this” factor becomes stronger. Your friend gets a cool girlfriend? Maybe she has some single friends with similar interests and values.
I know it’s still kind of a shallow way of looking at it but it helped me past the “jealous of friends’ success” tipping point into just being genuinely happy for them even for things that don’t help me. Learning to be happy with what you have is also important, and not being competitive with your friends. If you don’t see them as being on the “same team” as you, you don’t see them as friends, they’re really just The Joneses you’re trying to keep up with and have d**k measuring contests with.

Image credits: GrandUnhappy9211

A wonderful friend should be dependable as well. While it’s not always possible to drop everything for your best friend when they’re in a crisis, they should know that you’ll always be there to support them as much as you can.

If you want a friendship to be successful, both parties also need to be loyal. It’s perfectly normal to have a variety of friends, but you shouldn’t be dropping one for another. Stand by the people you care about, in good times and bad, and show them that you plan to stick around. 

#7

When I realized I was her last close friend left. Shortly thereafter I started to open my eyes and understand why that was the case.

seigneur101:

What was it?

whatnamedoyoulike (OP):

A lot of it was that she is a master at justifying her own bad decisions. Nothing is ever a big deal to her. When her electricity got shut off, it was because “stuff happens.” When she got fired from her fourth job in a year, it was “ok, I’m going to cruise on unemployment and give myself time to focus on art.” When she forgot someone’s birthday, it was because birthdays triggered her anxiety. And when she was served with divorce papers after refusing to attend marriage counseling, she insisted she had done everything in her power to save her marriage.
She is never wrong in her eyes and is the only adult I’ve seen consistently regress in life because of it. In the end, a 12 year friendship devolved into an absolute nightmare for me.

Image credits: whatnamedoyoulike

#8

In high school I had a male friend who was 2 years older than me and he was like a brother to me. I went to him for everything and we had a purely platonic friendship. He started dating a girl and she and I really hit it off. We became close friends and remained that way to this day. Eventually they broke up and I somehow stayed in touch with her than with him. Few years later after the breakup, we were having drinks one evening and she got a little tipsy, and told me how he was the one who broke up with her, but was still calling and talking to her like they’re dating, WHEN HE ALREADY HAD A NEW GIRLFRIEND. The more she told me, the more i realized how he was just dragging her along for a long time, almost like keeping her as a backup. What’s even worse was he got married 3 years ago, and still tried to put the moves on my friend! She now keeps her distance from him. I sometimes can’t believe how much I looked up to him in high school…

Drakmanka:

You matured, he didn’t. At one time he may well have been worth looking up to. Don’t feel bad about something younger you did, be glad that you outgrew both your young self and your old friend.

Image credits: cwt48

#9

Whenever I open up about my problems he talks about how good he is at everything, tells me I’m a broke p***y for working a regular job, tells me I won’t go anywhere without his financial support, gets mad at me if I don’t agree with him on everything, tried stealing from my friends, tried stabbing my cousin, constantly talks about how he wants to shoot someone, calls his mom a stupid b***h, punches his step dad, must I continue?

Anon:

This person sounds like they belong in a prison cell.

Image credits: jdhenschel

As we all know, a great friend is empathetic as well. They might need to deliver some bad news from time to time, but they should always consider your feelings when doing so. They should show compassion and sympathize with your situation, even if it’s different from their own, and you should never have to worry about them being intentionally unkind. 

#10

He was caught cheating in a regular poker game and instead of even apologizing, he blamed everyone else for being bad and said it was the only way he could keep himself entertained during the game.

This was a $50 buy-in game that had been going on regularly for several years, so not high stakes but not exactly playing for peanuts either.

ian9921:

$50 buy-in game? That’s even worse than if it had been high stakes! At least then he’d have a decent reason, this way he’s essentially just cheating for the sake of screwing you over.

Image credits: Hrekires

#11

When she ghosted me; then connected several years later. She gave me a sob story which I believed and gave her another chance. After two or three calls, she ghosted me again. Never again. Never.

Image credits: Rare-Philosopher-346

#12

When I found out that they were immediately dismissive of people’s interests and hobbies. It was a huge red-flag and I cut ties with that person shortly after.

Image credits: TonyStark39

Another trait that makes someone an excellent friend is being a good listener. Sometimes, you may need to vent about your relationship or your boss for 30 minutes, and they should let you get it out without interrupting or brushing you off. Now, it’s important that both friends are happy to listen to one another, as friendships can quickly deteriorate if they become one-sided. But if both friends care about what the other is saying, listening should come naturally.

#13

They made fun of me for not having a relationship with my dad. Their parents got divorced like a few months later so it’s kind of ironic.

shame_on_meStupid:

Classic projection.

Image credits: Broken_KitchenSink

#14

When he talked s**t about me behind my back – to my wife who doesn’t really know him. Does he think she’s going to keep this as their shared secret?

Snoo_26884:

He was testing the waters with her, seeing if she was happy in her marriage.

Image credits: xmodemlol

#15

I moved out of state and being away from him ended up being a relief. He’s just so negative and whiney and he always has something s****y to say about my life or my decisions. If I make a mistake its because I’m stupid, if something bad happens to me its always my fault. He just sucks as a friend. He’s married to one of my bffs so I still see him and its fine but its good that its only a once in a while thing.

Image credits: anon

At the end of the day, a great friend will make you feel good when you spend time with them. If any of the stories on this list are reminding you of your own friendships, you might want to seriously evaluate whether or not those relationships are serving you. Keep upvoting the stories that hit home for you, and if you’d like to check out another list from Bored Panda featuring similar experiences, look no further than right here.    

#16

I told him I liked a girl and he told me he liked her, too.

No big deal, except he then pretended to ask her if she liked me just so that he could lie and say ‘yeah bro she doesn’t like you.’

He also sabotaged someone guy’s relationship so that he could date his girlfriend, only to dump her a week later. A mutual friend casually said it was because the guy was a d**k, and so he deserved to have his relationship sabotaged.

He’s also been telling me that random people ‘really don’t like me’ even though I have literally never interacted with them, have hardly seen them, and mostly keep to myself. Even if it was true, how would he know? Why would these people who apparently hate me be talking about a guy that they’ve hardly ever met?

It’s interesting because when I first brought him to my house, my dog kept growling at him. I brushed it off at the time.

Image credits: aredri

#17

When they left town without telling me – and took everything they ever borrowed from me with them.

ian9921:

Moral of the story: never loan anything to anyone ever. My own less-than-ideal friends have taught me that.

remembertowelday525 (OP):

My take on this: do not loan anything you cannot afford not to ever get back. I try to still be a generous person, but if it matters and cannot be replaced, it stays with me.
I will loan my neighbor anything because we have keys to each others’ houses, and I can go get whatever back if I need it.

Image credits: remembertowelday525

#18

When she cheated on her boyfriend and also made comments about how good-looking she thought mine was.

Buh-bye 👋🏻.

Image credits: Cher_inator

#19

She told me that she’d been thinking about it and there was no way the baby I was carrying could be by my partner, I must be lying to cover up sleeping with another man.
She said she’d added up all the dates and it just didn’t work.
Then when I asked her to stop talking about it (because it wasn’t true!) She told me I didn’t have enough friends to cut contact with her.
Wrong.
See ya.

I_FP_TO_TURKEYS:

No friends is better than toxic friends, being able to be alone is awesome!

Image credits: Getonwithitplease

#20

When he belittled my hobbies and never supported my ideas, and only wanted to hang out of I could be of use to him. After a while of me being the only one driving and a few too many jokes targeting things that are important to me, I realized how I was giving so much and getting nothing in return. To this day I still dont return his calls or texts.

Image credits: Silas-Alec

#21

She got our entire friend group to believe I did something that in reality was her doing. They all believed her and I was depressed during the last 2 years of high school.

Image credits: Ravengirl1017

#22

She was going to get a tattoo in Toronto (2 hour drive one way) and didn’t want to go alone, so she asked me to come. Couple issues with this.

1 – it was during Covid, so I couldn’t go in the shop with her. I would’ve had to sit in the car in the parking lot for approximately 4 hours, alone.
2 – it was in a REALLY sketchy part of town. And again, waiting in the car, alone, for 4 hours.
3 – it was on my birthday. She asked me if I could reschedule my birthday plans and move them to the week after, because she couldn’t reschedule her tattoo appt. So again, 4 hours, alone, sketchy part of town, on MY birthday.

There had been small things before this, but I couldn’t believe she felt justified in asking all this of me. It was such a selfish request, I broke the friendship off a month later.

TheTrollys:

Did you go with her for the tattoo?

EconomySpot3018 (OP):

Nope. I initially said yes because I felt bad for her having to go alone, but changed my mind pretty quickly. Plus, to make it even more stupid, she was married and could’ve just brought her husband. He just didn’t feel like going either.

Image credits: EconomySpot3018

#23

She secretly f****d my ex. By the way, I wouldn’t have even cared about it at all if I had known about it – and didn’t really care when I did – the guy and I had been broken up for years. It’s just the fact that he casually mentioned it to me one day, which made me casually mention it to her. A few days later, he told me that she had said to him, “Why would you tell her?”

This girl was a compulsive liar, as it was. She was one of my best friends for six long years and we were attached at the hip, but it took the crippling anxiety that comes from ab*sing MDMA for me to start to “wake up” to her b******t. She had a great body, amazing tattoos all over, always had great hair, and she just radiated “cool”. She was a hardcore hipster. Loved to hold court any time we hung out with a group. I just overlooked her lies and insidious nature throughout our friendship because I loved her so much that I wanted to be her.

She did a lot of things that hurt me. Sadly, the whole “secretly f*****g my ex” thing was just the first of many things she got away with before I cut her out of my life in 2015. Somehow, I still miss her! That’s the dumbest part.

Edit: Before someone else comes along and misinterprets this as me being a baby about someone sleeping with my ex boyfriend, that isn’t what the issue was. I probably should have phrased it differently from the get-go. This ex – who is still a close friend- has slept with a lot of women I know and I never cared regardless of whether they told me directly or not. He and I dated in high school and this happened when we were in our early twenties. I wasn’t angry or upset about it even after the fact until I found out that she got mad at him for telling me about it. It was the principle, her doing something behind my back in secret that she thought would hurt me and never planning on telling me about it. It also isn’t the thing that ended our friendship – it’s just the first time she did something that made me question her honesty and loyalty. Trust is the bare minimum I require in any true relationship, romantic or platonic, and this girl had no problem manipulating and damaging my trust back in the day. This was just the first instance of it. I only felt comfortable leading my comment with “she secretly f****d my ex” because a lot of men and women adhere to the “code” of not f*****g their best friend’s exes without discussing it first, so I figured that would be more catchy than “she tried to hide something from me”.

Naughtyspider:

I had a toxic friend like this. If it makes you feel better, you don’t miss her, you probably only miss the friend and friendship you BELIEVED she was at the time and how it made you feel.
It helps me not to feel like a victim or a fool for believing the lies or putting up with the awful behaviour later.

Image credits: KayteeBlue

#24

Not friends with her anymore, but my friend Morgan and I had gossiped about this girl Corynne that we were no longer friends with (Corynne definitely did some things that deserved to be gossiped about). About a year later, Morgan decided to start talking to Corynne again, yet still gossiped about her to me. I told Morgan that I didn’t feel comfortable talking about Corynne since they were now friends again. And that I support her being friends with Corynne again even if I didn’t want to be. Morgan’s response- “I’m not actually her friend. I’m just pretending to be so that I can gain information from her about her life so that I can talk more s**t about her.” I was stunned. It was just such a b****y, mean girl, manipulative thing to do. Let alone say so casually. I told her how f****d up that was and she literally couldn’t grasp it. We didn’t stay friends for much longer after that.

Image credits: anon

#25

When he didnt bother to ever call or come and see me after my mothers death to see how I was doing but then turns up at my door the minute he wanted something from me. We are no longer friends.

Image credits: _Rick_O_Shea_

#26

When I waited for them to call me first.

I’m still waiting…

Dances_With_Demons:

This is why I no longer talk to my mother. I realized I was always the one reaching out to her. I made it a point to call and text every couple of weeks and would get a three word reply two days later, if that (and she rarely answered a call), so I decided to see how long it would take for her to reach out to me.
Six years and counting.

Image credits: JohnGilbonny

#27

Talks about herself all the time. It doesn’t make her an a*****e… but makes her boring to be around.

Image credits: MoonieNine

#28

He tried to convince me to not stay with my girlfriend because she’s Chinese and he said he doesn’t like Chinese people because of what the Chinese government did in the past to their land.

He has numerously asked if I were to stay with her before and always tell me that I should marry someone from my country instead.

Image credits: voanjobory

#29

Our friendship was just so superficial. He never truly asked how I was doing or took any interest in my life, family, interests. Every conversation was about some girl he liked, another one he made out with or bragging about himself. The true moment that he revealed just how much of an a*****e he was, was when he was dating a girl his parents didn’t like and so he tried to convince me to play along as if I liked her so he could break up with her and go for a girl his parents did approve of. I was shocked he’d expect me to play along and our friendship just fizzled out after that conversation. He never changed and we attended the same college where he sabotaged any potential friendships with people he knew so they wouldn’t get to know me by spreading rumors amongst his friend group. It’s okay though because karma eventually got him right in his butt.

Aragren:

May I ask how Karma payed him back?

pupp3tmaster (OP):

So the jerk friend considered himself God’s gift to women and could never help himself when it came to women. After graduation, he went on to have an internship at a newspaper back east in a small town. When he was close to finishing up his internship at 24, he decided it was a smart idea to mess around with a recently graduated 18-year-old woman and this was only a few months after she just graduated high school. Well, he got caught by the young lady’s father and it’s a small town so word got around. He lost his internship because of the scandal and had to get a job at the local target because surprise, surprise he ended up knocking her up and had himself an old-fashioned shotgun wedding. I always kind of knew he would end up knocking someone up eventually but his house of cards really fell in on him.

Image credits: pupp3tmaster

#30

She sent me a funny meme she posted on her Twitter (I didn’t have Twitter so I saw it thru the internet) and I decided to look at the other stuff she posted. Found a screenshot of a private convo between us where I misread a text of hers and got mad because of the misunderstanding. She only posted the parts that made me look bad and didn’t show that we resolved the whole thing.

Image credits: Mediocre_Newspaper31

#31

Had a friend in college who would occasionally lie to get off work or make up a reason to seem more interesting is and then. I didn’t think that much of it until I distinctly remember her bragging about how she lied to someone just because she could and how funny she found it that the person believed her and was making fun of them for it (when it was a “believable lie) and I was sort of baffled that she thought her lying made the other person dumb and didn’t just make her immoral or scheming. Due to this and other things we didn’t remain friends for very long.

#32

When she got involved with a married man for the 3rd time.

#33

I had a friend that was a very promiscuous girl, I had no issue with that, until I found out she was using me and my innocent personality then, to distract her mom and make her think she was like me, and when she used my house as a literal hotel once, with my family here and everything… I knew it was it.

#34

I won a free trip for two to a tropical island resort many years ago.

I was single at the time, so I brought a friend of mine. My friend managed to pick up some woman who was there ON HER HONEYMOON, and go and f**k her on the beach, and then took her back to the hotel room for more action.

#35

When she asked me to be a bridesmaid only to tell me nevermind a month later because she asked too many people to be in her bridal party and when I asked why I was the one cut out she said she didn’t see me staying in her life, whilst drunk, then revoked that statement a month after her wedding.

#36

We started out friends in high school. We were both bullied, but found safety in numbers. Eventually he moved to another high school but we stayed best friends. We were basically brothers, liking all the same stuff, hanging out every weekend and talking for hours.

After high school was when that all changed. He got a girlfriend, but that wasn’t what ended it. Eventually he broke up with her, and he was quite distraught. He came to me for support and I gave it to him. Our friendship had waned, but with her out of the picture it was renewed.

Eventually we began drifting apart again as he had found another girlfriend. I thought it might have been jealousy on my part so I pushed those thoughts to the back of my head. The contacts become less seldom understandably, but there came concerns about money which is a whole other story.

One day I got a call from him out of the blue asking if he wanted to go flatting. His parents were moving out of town, but he needed somewhere to stay to stay with his girlfriend. I thought , great, some time to spend with him again. Worst mistake.

In the 9 months we lived together, because I worked and I didn’t he agreed to do the grocery shopping and occasional cleaning. I still him enough to give him my bank card so we could go halves in food etc. That was my first mistake. He would take my card and would be gone for a week or two at a time. The food would be running short, and I would be strapped to buy anything without going to a bank to withdraw money which wasn’t easy to do. Next, as far as moving into the flat, in those 9 months, all of his junk remained in boxes, scattered all through the apartment. He had no issue using my stuff that I bought for the appartment for me, but was never there long enough to sort his own s**t out.

He was good friends with our neighbours, and whenever they were together they would treat me like s**t. I brought this up with them and him several times being adults and all, but nothing changed. He would promise to change and to speak with them, but it never happened. Just heading out to work would mean walking by their door to their f*****g antics. On one occasion my friend even asked whether I would be interested in moving in to a bigger place with them to share the rent, which was a f**k no from me, which he seemed to appreciate the reasons for.

During this time I decided to go back to study, of which he did not support me doing at all. His girlfriend started talking to me around this time as well, asking me whether my friend had talked to me about something yet. He hadn’t of course. A few weeks went by and she asked me a few times whether he had spoken to me, and of course he hadn’t. 2 days prior to the start of my study, he finally talked with me. He was moving out with the aformentioned plan of joining with the dickheads next door at another location. 2 days. I had quit my job to go back to study, and now he was basically dropping me with barely any notice. Judging my when his gf had first started hinting something was going on he had known for weeks but never told me.

Typing it all makes me realise how much s**t I put up with it before I dropped it. I have never really spoken to him much since that ordeal. I think I hung on for so long because before all that, we had been such great friends to begin with.

#37

When she sent me a series of scathing texts about how my depression was making it too hard to be my friend, and everyone else had problems too, and I needed to stop feeling sorry for myself. She sent them as I was sitting in the hospital with my dying dad. Two months after losing my mom as well. I haven’t spoken to her since.

#38

She would only talk about herself. And if I had the chance to speak, she would take what I said and somehow relate it to her, even if it had nothing to do with her in the first place. One time we were supposed to go out and instead she came over and talked my ear off for two hours straight about herself. I unfortunately still am “friends” with her but I distance myself as much as possible. I want to cut her off but have no idea how to do it.

#39

When he told my then current GF how much he wanted to sleep with her. That’s putting it nicely he was more crude about it.

#40

She’s always the victim, and never to blame for anything.

#41

His wife was pregnant, originally it was going to be a boy, when he got the phone call saying otherwise, he hung up on her.

This all happened while she was on loudspeaker an we were driving somewhere. Literally just straight up hung up the phone.

#42

He only wants to come do gig work with me to buy video games for himself. It isn’t about helping me fix our car, or anything else. I feel used so, so often. And I just… accept it… because I am too forgiving and gentle of heart to want to see him unhappy or disappointed. So even when he doesn’t do anything for me (or “us”) at all, I still end up blowing my saved funds on him. He doesn’t seem to properly grasp that I have to pay taxes on this income so every Steam card I buy him for $50 actually cost me more like $65 because it came out of income that hadn’t been taxed yet.

I don’t have the interest, time, or energy to “find someone else” or whatever. Every relationship I have ever had, I put all my proverbial eggs in that basket, because relationships aren’t perfect and all I’ve ever really wanted was to be loved.

But it sure as f**k hurts thinking I’m just a warm willing wet spot with a wallet and a car.

#43

This happened during middle school at a sleepover at my friends house. We had decided to go swimming outside in the pool in the backyard. Like 2 hours later we hear thunder and started to get everything inside the house or garage. Her dog ends up running out of the house and I’m the one to chase it across the block. When I get the dog back inside I go back to getting everything inside the house only to find out I’m locked out. At this point it started raining. She then proceeds to throw a pack of poptarts at my face, and dump one of those 2 liter bottles of Pepsi on my head while it’s starting to pour rain outside. When her brother finally lets me back inside, she ends up barging into the bathroom 2 or 3 times while in taking a shower. I haven’t been over to her house again and I haven’t talked to her much since then.

#44

When my ex gf told me about his role in our breakup.
He and his SO basically talked her into thinking I wasn’t good enough for her.

#45

Just after the January 6th insurrection, I posted something on the social media. He chimed in, and I responded that the people who assaulted the Capitol were a******s who needed to be rounded up and put into prison.

Haven’t heard from him since.

#46

When he knew I lost my job. He said he wanted a coffee and didn’t offer to get me one knowing I just lost my job and had no money. He then told me to f**k off as we were parting ways. He was kind of person who would go for the jugular when the chips are down. Got rid of him after 13 years of putting up with his abuse.

#47

8th grade. Became a loner because I realized I just didn’t like the people I was friends with.

#48

When they were nice at first but then cut me out of conversations, telling me not to “butt in”. A friend doesn’t dictate when you’re allowed to speak.

#49

They pretty much abandoned me in a time of pretty intense need. Solidified my decision to leave the area and go do something worthwhile.

#50

I’ve been posting on him recently, he was my former neighbor and friend. We didn’t immediately hit it off but after a while we became good friends. I tried helping him out (he’s an unemployed single dad of two special needs kids). He eventually saw my kindness as something to take advantage of so late last fall he either broke into my house (or enabled someone else to do it for him) and stole money from me. When I confronted him about this he physically attacked me.

I can’t say it doesn’t hurt.

#51

I would start a lot of activities, like game nights or tennis or just hanging out. Anything from goofing around with one or two people at a park, to 20 people playing Cards Against Humanity and making quesadillas. This grew over the course of about 3 years, mostly with people I worked with. I started noticing some things were a bit off, and then I couldn’t help but keep noticing.

Like at game nights, we would do stuff like have a marshmallow fight or toss nerf balls around, and at some point I realized I wasn’t really part of that. No one threw a marshmallow at me. I would be laughing and zinging them around, they would all be play-chasing each other with them, but no one ever threw one at me. I wasn’t sure what that meant. It was super weird once I noticed it.

Other things became obvious once I paid attention. I had couches and chairs in my place, but if I sat on a couch, people would all crowd onto the other couch while I had one to myself. I just sat in chairs instead, and suddenly the couch was fine once I wasn’t on it. I tried to figure out why. Didn’t think it was hygiene, I knew I wasn’t bothering anyone or being creepy. I don’t know, just a vibe I give off I guess.

Eventually I realized no one initiated anything with me. Lots of texting, lots of hanging out going on, but if I didn’t initiate it, it didn’t happen. I didn’t want to see any of this stuff but I couldn’t help knowing it once I knew it.

So I eventually stopped initiating. Figured I would give it a week or two, see what happened. It’s been a few years now, haven’t done anything with those people (or anyone else) since. I just went back to my accustomed isolation, changed jobs, and never heard a word. I still have the same phone and such.

I guess this isn’t a good answer because I don’t think they were a******s. The problem had to be me, I just don’t know what it was.

#52

I had a group that I was in from 2019-2021. They became a******s over time, and it took me longer to see that. It was when I failed my psych 101 class (I’m not the best with online classes and tried the best I could) and when they heard about that, they laughed to my face, called me stupid and a failure.

Early 2022 I met up with them again thinking it would just be “listen to this concert for someone we all know and go on our ways”. My one closer friend offered to drive me and I accepted, and then afterwards she joined the group, made eye contact after the concert was done and said “bye” and left with them to the doors. They doubled back and said “you can come with us to another town to a friends place or I can get my mom to drive you home.” I was so overwhelmed and embarrassed that I just went with them to the other town. I called my brother to come pick me up after an hour, and when he was on his way out, everyone else left. Haven’t been into contact with them again after that.

#53

I use to hang out with this guy every day(I hesitate to call him a friend because looking back we were just 2 terrible alcoholics who used “hanging out together” as an excuse to get wasted everyday) and he would constantly b*m cigarettes from not just me but everyone we hung out with and literally never buy his own. If somebody asked him for one he’d go “Oh I don’t smoke.” Well after like years of this I finally confronted him about it and said something like”dude if you really believe you don’t smoke you’re just lying to yourself.” And he replied with “No man, I’m lying to you.” For whatever reason after a frickin avalanche of s****y stuff he did to me and my friends that was the thing that flipped the switch lol. This was like 20 years ago. I really hope dude was able to turn his life around because he was a disaster when I finally gave up.

#54

When my friends and I were walking around an abandoned building, we ran into some j****e. We were in some kind of pit from which we could only get out with the help of the man who stayed on top. This “friend” helped everyone but me, leaving us in the pit. The j****e turned out to be harmless and helped me, we chatted, he asked me not to tell anyone that we had seen him, I am still grateful to this stranger.

#55

When he snorted c*****e in front of his 4 year old son.

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