There are very obvious red flags that show up right away and are a clear sign that the relationship isn’t worth developing. But most of the time, the red flags are more subtle and are easier to dismiss as a one-off thing or a not-so-serious character flaw that doesn’t mean anything. Those subtle signs are the most important to catch as they may indicate that the person is hiding something more serious.
People on Reddit discussed what are some red flags that are related to cooking that might mean that the person isn’t the right fit. Many of them not only shared what cooking habits they find alarming, but they also spoke about signs that, from their own experience, were red flags.
Would you add anything to this list? Which habit that people mentioned do you think is a solid sign to rethink the relationship? Let us know in the comments!
More info: Reddit
#1 Defending Mom’s Cooking Knowing She Has Poisoned It
There was a letter to an advice column years ago, from a woman convinced her mother in law was slightly poisoning her every time they went to her house for dinner.
After every meal she grew violently ill and threw up/had diarrhea.
When she told her husband her suspicion he said she was crazy. His mother was a saint who adored her and would die before hurting her.
The advice columnist urged the wife to swap her plate with her husband’s during the next dinner. The woman wrote back saying she followed the advice and it was her husband who became violently ill after the meal.
When she told him what she’d done she said he looked at her with such loathing she realized he’d suspected what his mom was doing all along but, instead of standing up for her, he decided to gaslight her about her suspicions to avoid upsetting his mom.
Talk about your red flags.
Image credits: Brewnonono
#2 When Someone Doesn’t Cook But Are Picky Eaters
When they don’t know how to cook, refuse to cook, but are super picky when you cook for them. Nope nope nope
Image credits: Joygernaut
#3 Making Just One Person Cook All The Time
Refusing to regularly take over the responsibility for providing meals.
God bless him, my late father could *not* cook. He could manage a few basics, would help by fixing sides dishes, but anything more complicated, well…. Nope.
That said both he and my Mom worked fairly long days at not-easy jobs. Still, Mom was usually the one who was responsible for dinner.
But there were evenings when Mom walked in the door, dropped her bad, and announced, ” I’m not cooking.”
Dad, while hopeless at cooking, was not stupid, and replied with, ” Where do you want to go?”
Yes, we were lucky to be able to eat out regularly. But that aside, that one exchange was a fantastic example of how they stayed married for nearly 40 years.
It didn’t matter that Dad couldn’t cook; what mattered was that it was no longer Mom’s problem.
We usually went out to a typical family restaurant. But sometimes it was McDonalds. Sometimes we ordered pizza. Sometimes it was declared an “every man for himself” night, and everybody, including us kids, just fixed ourselves something.
But the big thing was Dad was always willing to take over for Mom when needed. And *that* was why it worked.
Image credits: Unique_Football_8839
#4 Expecting A Cooked Meal
Being a full grown adult that waits to be cooked for. Knowing full well, his spouse might also be working full time. But they won’t lift a finger to grab dinner on the way home or if already home toss something in the microwave.
Image credits: LurkingAintEazy
#5 Not Clicking The Tongs Before Using Them
Not clicking the tongs before using them.
Image credits: ForswornPheonix
#6 Being Ungrateful For Having Dinner Cooked For You
I once decided to cook for a girl I was dating. It was pretty fresh at the time, third time I had seen her. I thought it might be nice to cook, have a wine and chat etc. as you do. While I was cooking she told me to stop talking so much and hurry up because she was hungry in a rude, annoyed tone. That turned me off to the point I didn’t see her again after that night!
Image credits: Big-Win6220
#7 Not Helping To Clean Up After You Cooked
You cook and they dont help clean
Image credits: Chrispeedoff
#8 Not Knowing How To Cook As An Adult
Being a full-grown adult who doesn’t know how to cook
Image credits: b3yondthegoblincity
#9 Not Washing Their Hands
No hand washing ?
Image credits: LongjumpingArm6916
#10 Forcing Vegetarians To Taste Meat
That a*****e on YouTube who is tricking his vegetarian wife into loving the taste of meat.
Sneaking animal products into things she believes is meat free.
Huge piece of s**t. Unless it’s all b******t for getting views, then mild piece of s**t.
Image credits: Tacos_117
#11 Not Having Spices
Not having any spices at all in your kitchen
Image credits: Wordhippo
#12 Lying About Being Allergic To Certain Foods When They Just Don’t Like The Texture
Saying they are allergic to some ingredients but later admit they “just don’t like the texture.”
I get the texture thing, I hate mushy slimy myself. But ffs don’t pull the “I am allergic to mushrooms/peas/onions/tomatoes” thing.
Image credits: danseckual
#13 Not Eating Leftovers
people who won’t eat leftovers
Image credits: missbethd
#14 Not Worrying About Glass Shards In Food
I knew a guy who dropped his $1 bottle of spaghetti sauce, jar broke in the bag. He goes and makes spaghetti…. With sauce. We ask if this is the same sauce…. Yup! He just pulled the chunks of glass out of it ?. I do not eat that spaghetti or anything he cooked after that
Image credits: Prestigious-Range-75
#15 Just Winging It
My ex wife wanted to make meatloaf when we were first married. I was like cool I love meatloaf. So she pulled this meatloaf out of the oven when I got home. It was a slightly charred sad looking meatball floating in grease. She was apologetic about it but I didn’t say s**t about it. I have never complained about her cooking anything. I made meatloaf a few weeks later and she loved it and wanted to know what I put in it. I told her and asked her how she makes meatloaf. She said you take some meat and put it in a pan. No egg, salt, pepper, ketchup. Just meat. I was like yep this is going to take some work. Turns out she was overconfident about everything and just winged it.
Image credits: UniqueFlavors
#16 Putting The Best Knives In The Dishwasher
When they put your best knives in the dishwasher
Image credits: ChimpyChompies
#17 Not Being Sanitary With The Food
Haven’t seen cleanliness yet.
I’m not talking about pots, pans and dishes after (that should be negotiated or depends on who invited who. But one should always offer to help).
I’m talking about during preparation and cooking. For example, if you handle raw meat, you should use soap and warm water before touching anything else. Any possible contamination on a counter top, …
Image credits: Stay-Thirsty
#18 Thinking ‘Browning’ Means Leaving In The Fridge To Turn Brown
My ex thought that “browning” ground meat meant leaving it in the fridge til it turned brown.
Image credits: thunder2132
#19 Medium Rare Chicken
Medium rare chicken
Image credits: dw87190
#20 Making Fun Of Your Diet Restrictions
Making fun of your diet restrictions.
#21 Preparing One Thing At A Time When Making A Meal
The last time I saw this question posted, a guy responded saying that his wife only makes one thing at a time when making a meal. Mashed potatoes until they’re done, then beginning the meat, etc. He hadn’t had a hot meal in years. That comment still haunts me.
#22 Making A Mess In The Kitchen Because It’s Your Turn To Cook And The Other Person’s Turn To Clean
Not being the one who’s chore it is to clean something doesn’t give you license to make more work than necessary for someone else. It’s a huge red flag when you and your partner have the alternating “one cooks, other cleans” chore cycle and your partner completely *trashes* the kitchen every time it’s their turn to cook. I’m talking leaving out ingredients, spilling and splashing stuff everywhere, dirtying way more cookware than needed, or cooking in a way that leaves burnt on residue so you have to deep clean.
When I was still married to my ex I always tried to keep things neat when I cooked and he always left a huge mess. Turns out its a big warning sign that they don’t value your time or have consideration for your feelings.
#23 When Someone Doesn’t Like Pizza
I am unable to trust anyone who doesn’t like pizza.
Image credits: piles_of_anger
#24 Saying That Msg Is Extremely Bad For Food
Saying that MSG is extremely bad for food.
#25 Avoiding Using Garlic Or Garlic Powder
If they never use garlic or garlic powder.
Image credits: pinktuliplover
#26 Changing Oven Settings Without Being Asked
Touching the oven when I’m cooking. Had a friend “fix” the oven while I was reverse searing ribeyes a few years back so they’d cook faster. You know what happens to a ribeye when you leave it in the oven at 375 for an hour?
She did the same to a rack of ribs on another occasion. Saw that the grill was set to low and thought “That can’t be right.” Jacked it up to high without telling anybody, and treated us to a nice rack of charcoal chips for dinner.
Image credits: Rhodie114
#27 Refusing To Eat Vegetables
Refuses to eat vegetables
#28 Purposefully Cooking Things Their Partner Doesn’t Like Or Is Allergic To
If they are purposefully cooking things that their partner does not like or worse, that they are allergic to.
Image credits: BlueRFR3100
#29 Seriously Judging Someone’s Taste
someone who judges my personal tastes so strongly that they allow it to threaten a (potential) relationship
#30 Washing The Dishes With Cold Water
Washes pans with ice cold water as “hot water hurts my hands”. Maybe try warm water and oh great, everything is coated in a thin film of f*****g GREASE.
Thanks for the feedback, but you’re all wrong, warm water is superior to cold.
Also don’t be under the illusion I haven’t always been using dish soap.
Image credits: aunoonute
#31 Ordering Food When Someone Cooks For You
I love to cook. My ex-boyfriend was a really picky eater. So i tried to make things without the ingredients he doesnt like. But several times after i cooked he said “im just gonna order something”. I know it sounds like im a bad cook, but thats not the case. I worked in a kitchen for years and my friends all love my food. I still get pissed when i think about the time i just wanted him to tast my soup, just a little spoon. He refused because he was gonna order shoarma and didnt wanna ruin the ‘before taste’.
#32 Buying Food And Then Throwing It Away
Not necessarily cooking but it’s a pet peeve of mine when people buy things and just, don’t eat them but throw them away… watched my ex purchase a wonderful looking ice cream, sit and let it melt for half an hour, then get up and throw it away.
#33 Complimenting Someone’s Water’s Taste
My brother told my friend she makes very nice ice water.
Image credits: brkh47
#34 Putting On The Pasta Before Preparing The Sauce
I once dated a women who the first (and last) time she ever cooked dinner for me, she put on the pasta before starting the sauce. I watched in horror as pasta boiled for 30ish minutes while she struggled to prep sauce from a jar gussied up with some onion that she chopped without taking the skin off first, and even that involved some flailing to the point where I am amazed she made it into her 30s with all of her fingers.
It remains one of the worst meals I’ve ever eaten, and the relationship ended a week or two later, but she was the first ‘serious’ relationship I was in on the far side of a multi-year relationship ending, and I really needed a win at the time as part of moving on. I wasn’t going to tell her how to prepare food in her own (clearly little used) kitchen.
Image credits: faceintheblue
#35 Ketchup On Everything
Ketchup on everything
Image credits: rtgurley
#36 Giving Advice On Cooking For A Professional Cook
I’m a professional cook and I’ve had so many guys give me (badly informed) “advice” on stuff I’m doing wrong while I’m in the middle of cooking them a meal. Ex: “you didn’t marinate the steak? It’s gonna turn out super dry”
Image credits: egrails
#37 Blaming Someone Else For Not Cleaning Up After Cooking
When she cooks and then “forgets” to throw away all her packaging and trash and rotting food in the trash can that’s 6 feet away from the stove.
Then she proceeds to try to make YOU out to be the bad guy when you confront her about the scraps of food left on the cutting board that have shriveled up after sitting out to collect flies for a solid 24hrs….
This is the same chick who **regularly** (I could overlook it if it was just once or twice) leaves her 2 year old son’s p****d diapers on the floor in the bathroom for MORE than 24hrs after she gives him a bath and then gets mad at you for bringing it up when you come home from work and thd bathroom smell like p**s diapers and **you** have to throw them away.
Image credits: TotallynottheCCP
#38 Screaming About Not Heating Up The Pan Properly
Screaming at your girlfriend for putting onions in a luke warm pan.
Image credits: yellowsm42
#39 Setting An Electric, Flameless Stove On Fire
My ex set the stove on fire. Making spaghetti. Our ELECTRIC, FLAMELESS, stove. Don’t ask me how it happened. I have no idea. I was just on my phone and she went “Uhh babe.” Looked up to see our stove on fire.
#40 Putting Applesauce On Everything
I have a roommate who puts applesauce on everything he eats. So yeah that’s probably it
Image credits: BADBOiSEBASTiAN
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